1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask... 2 ************************* INSTALLED: 14 JUN 85 ********************** 3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System) Mike Day System operator 4 ************************************************************ 5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION 6 PLACED ON THIS SYSTEM. 7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privately owned 8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public. 9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. As the system is 10 privately owned, I retain the right to remove any and all messages which 11 I may find offensive. Because of the limited size of the system, it will be 12 periodically purged of messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved) 13 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out of the 14 ENTER mode. The message is automatically stored. If after entering the 15 message you find you made a mistake, use the replace command to replace 16 the line. To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up. 17 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system. 18 ************************************************************ 19 20 You're the tops, you're the Colliseum, you're the tops, you're the Louvre 21 museum... What's more appropriate than Gershwin for the top? Isis has never 22 been at the top before. Isis likes the top. Why did I have to go all the 23 way to the hospital before I got here, though??????????? 24 Piper: Sorry to give you the impression I am a professional proofreader. 25 No, I just did it for all of my buddies in college in exchange for beer 26 (those were my younger days) and victuals of other sorts. Still do it for 27 a graphic artist friend of mine. I also do translation from French, 28 Spanish, Russian or German in exchange for reasonable bribes. The closest 29 I ever got to the pro circuit was knowing John (Transmaniacon) Shirley 30 who proofed for Ursala LeGuinn for a while. (namedropper!). Did I ever 31 tell you how much I enjoy your writing? I do, and I don't think it's 32 unreadable at all. Some people accuse me of using too big of words, too. 33 But using the right word at the right time makes for an economy of 34 language as well as a harmony and rhythm too often missing in our lives. 35 Here I am, being uneconomical, on my soap box running at the mouth..... 36 Come to the nerd-o-fest this weekend and talk to me on remote, please. 37 I would love to meet you, even vicariously as my circumstances demand. 38 {*}{*}!!!(bored)isis!!!{*}{*}still left handed AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!! 39 sorry, Ursula, that is. Blame it on the overworked synapses. 40 {*}{*}hi Tinny! you're not the only one sans brain!{*}{*} 41 ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 42 Milch: Ok, but can you DRIVE it?? 43 ??????????????? The Doctor ???????????????????????? June 14, 1985 at 12:05 ???? 44 /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ 45 Ahh, so close and yet so far... 46 Friar Tuck: I resemble that remark!! Some of the twits that are only on 47 for the summer aren't all that bad! (Or are you referring only to high school 48 twits, and not us twits from college??) 49 Sox: While we are discussing plots and infiltrations, I have one for you: 50 I am of the firm opinion that Nutra Sweet is a non-silicon-based alien life- 51 form that is trying to form a very unhealthy symbiotic relationship with us 52 Terrans. It's gotten itselves into our food in a dormant state, and once eaten 53 takes over its unsuspecting host. You'll never catch me eating the stuff!! 54 To All: In case you haven't noticed, you're now stuck with me full-time 55 for the next three months. The stuff on these two drives is TERRIFIC, and I 56 hope my contributions won't upset the Quality Factor. So here's to Good 57 Writing, and all that ! 58 /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/Luingil/\/\/\/\/\/\(When'sthenextSCAevent?)/\/\/\/\/\ 59 60 Luingil: Are you an *official* SCA'er (dues & all that)? If so, what did you 61 think of the filler item in the latest TI? ("No, I'm in a play".. indeed!) 62 __________________________________Leonard_______________________________________ 63 64 KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA 65 Story-line? Can't type now... On the lamb at the moment. Must run. 66 KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA KOSTA 67 68 /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/ 69 Leonard: Nope, not yet. I'm just a broke college student who must not 70 have snitched that one from the one *real* member that she knows. Rats!! 71 (Of course, you know who's getting my next free $20... 72 /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/Luingil of Annador,Future Oficial SCA'er/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/ 73 74 .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-. 75 Kosta, please, if you're trully `on the lamb', would you PLEASE get 76 off of her, as Mary would probably like to talk privately to her lawyer... 77 .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-. 78 *=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*X^n*=*=*=*=*=*=*(by any other name=* 79 piper: VERY sorry to leave you in the lurch! just one of those this. 80 I sorta bit off more than I can chew withe trying to get something goon 81 Alt World and deeply involved on tanis and now gary's got that up/doene 82 for nec 8201's + M-100's I ptobably wont be around all that much herecept 83 to lurk) or bit (which is kinda difficult place for my sslloowwww mind) 84 *=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=* 85 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 86 Doctor: Like I said, ONE THING AT A TIME. The existence of a clutch is 87 something entirely new. I'll probably kill the engine a half-dozen times or 88 more before getting the knack. Oh, well, at least the financial end of it 89 has improved. Paycheck Friday (21st, I think), debt down to $100. 90 All else: So sorry, can't make it to this PorSFiS (I think it's this Sat., but 91 my thinking hasn't been too clear of late (Situation Normal? (What's Normal? 92 (Ha, I can do this too, Piper!)))). I don't think I'd enjoy watching poor 93 Farley squirm under the interrogation 94 lamps of NET, anyway. Until another time, I am 95 +++++++++++++++ Milchar +++++++++++++++++++++++++++ June 14, 1985 ++++++++++++ 96 \'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/ 97 does anyone know any crisis hot-line 98 numbers for the portland area? I would 99 like it if you could post them here 100 please. Thank you. 101 \'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/tim\'/\'/ 102 {*}{*}!!!isis!!!{*}{*} 103 Tim: I'd be glad to, but what kind 104 of crisis are you referring to? 105 A.A............223-xxxx 106 N.A............228-xxxx 107 Domestic Violence..640-xxxx 108 (General) Crisis line-Ptld..223-xxxx 109 Hillsboro.......648-xxxx 110 Rape Victims....640-xxxx 111 The best place to find these are in 112 the phone book-blue community service 113 pages. I'm in Hillsboro - so I have 114 Hillsboro numbers, but 223-xxxx will 115 refer you to the best source for you 116 in Portland, so start there. 117 That's better -- reset the margin, Isis, then it won't beep! 118 Luingil -- Next close event is June 28-30, Kreigstreiber in Banks. This 119 is the fifth anniversary, bound to be great! 120 Thanks to all who are keeping this board cheerful and soothing -- I really 121 need it! 122 {*}{*}!!!isis!!!{*}{*} 123 \'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/ 124 !!!isis!!! thank you for the numbers. And I didn't now they were 125 in the phone book, thanks. By the way, are you in the hospital for something? 126 \'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/tim\'/\'/ 127 &*%_#*%_)!#*%_!)*%_)#*%_)@#*%_+@#*%_)@#%)_#@!*%_^&_#$)_#$)!*^_)#!*^_!)#*^!^*#$ 128 capt'n barefoot : May I be so bold to ask what part of your sentence was 129 misnamed? America? Paradise? Virgin? Or Island? Since I do believe the 130 first and the last are still true, it must be one of the middle two. I 131 await your response with great trepidation. 132 Milch : Do my eyes deceive me? Have your purchased your own mode of trans- 133 portation? Wait! Let me guess...Hmmm 1968 Ford Pickup with twin-I-Beam 134 suspension? We will all miss you today. I had the tungsten lamps packed 135 and everything. But maybe the public ridicule is enuf. 136 Kosta : Now wait a minute! I didn't know I was opening the door into a hot 137 and heavy menage-a-trois! Behind The Green Door indeed... 138 Leonard : Better get those extra disks you need. Now that summer is here I 139 have no more excuses to keep the remainder of the archives from your hot 140 little hands. I'll get the software needed. 141 Mikey : Any word on that strange 5-key problem? I'll try to run the games 142 disk out to you sometime early next week. 143 Petrov : Let me be the first to welcome you back. But be warned, you'll have 144 a tough time with the sheep in this burg. That's the inside scoop from a 145 friend of yours and a person you should know. (Gene Wilder) 146 )_*%@_)%*_*%)_@*%)_@*%_@*^_)*^ L'homme sans Parity *%_*%@_)#*%_*%_@*%)_*@@_*% 147 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 148 L'homme: Well, not quite. It's a 1977 Ford Courier. 149 ++++++ 150 There's a signpost up ahead.... I am now entering the lurking zone. 151 ++++++++++++++++ Milchar +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 152 !!!!!!!!!!!Political Paranoia Patrol Alert!!!!!!!!!!!!! 153 In case you hadn't heard, there's been a hijacking going on across the 154 ocean -- TWA from Athens to Lebanon to Algiers to Lebanon..... Am I 155 paranoid, or did I really get the message last night that they sent 156 the Delta 9 force (of the great helicopter hostage rescue, remember?) 157 to the Middle East? And did I also hear that they did not send them to 158 Lebanon, but sent them into a strategic position to strike Iran if the 159 plane is blown with passengers on it? Say it isn't so! Please! 160 Sorry to invade BWMS with the real world, but I am 161 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!PARANOID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 162 {*}{*}{*}!!!isis!!!{*}{*}{*} 163 Tim: Sorry, I was assuming that people knew and gossiped. I am in the 164 hospital recovering from a partially collapsed lung, and am consoling 165 myself by hanging around on the boards. Glad you found the info useful! 166 I used to do hotline work in Corvallis -- so I know something of it. 167 168 Isis Corollary to the (W)Hole Theory 169 Since we have been speaking of holes and socks, let me add my theory. 170 The combination of current from the motor, heat and motion have created 171 a condition inside laundry dryers such that a micro black hole is 172 attracted into the field. These black holettes are of such a size that 173 they attract one (and only one) of a random pair of socks within the 174 dryer. The space warp caused by this phenomenon is such that when the 175 sock reappears, it will do so anywhere in the universe that has a dryer. 176 The reappearance of the socks looses a subatomic particle known as a 177 Selectron. These particles are known to gently nudge BINGO beads into 178 the gravity feed. Scientists at Stanford are working on a Selectron 179 field theory that may be able to predict BINGO winnings by the amount 180 of socks a person has lost, but this research has been labelled Top 181 Secret for fear that the Soviets will ruin the economy by BINGO parlor 182 infiltration. 183 {*}{*}{*}!!!isis!!!{*}{*}{*} 184 '-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'- 185 The following is a quote from John Gardner. Since many writers hang 186 out here, I thought they mighy enjoy it... 187 188 Like other kinds of intelligence, the storyteller's is partly natural, 189 partly trained. It is composed of several qualities, most of which, in 190 normal people, are signs of either immaturity or incivility: wit (a tendency 191 to make irreverent connections); obstinacy and a tendency towards churlish- 192 ness (a refusal to believe what all sensible people know is true); child- 193 ishness (an apparent lack of mental focus and serious life purpose, a fond- 194 ness for daydreaming and telling pointless lies, a lack of proper respect, 195 mischievousness, an unseemly propensity for crying over nothing); a marked 196 tendency toward oral or anal fixation or both (the oral manifested by 197 excessive eating, drinking, smoking, and chattering; the anal by nervous 198 cleanliness and neatness coupled with a weird fascination with dirty jokes); 199 remarkable powers of eidetic recall, or visual memory (a usual feature of 200 early adolescence and mental retardation): a strange amixture of shameless 201 playfullness and embarrassing earnestness, the latter often heightened by 202 irrationally intense feelings for or against religion; patience like a 203 cat's; a criminal streak of cunning; psychological instability; reckless- 204 ness; impulsiveness, and improvidence; and finally, an inexplicable and 205 incurable addition to stories, written or oral, bad or good. Not all 206 writers have exactly these same virtues, of course. Occasionally one finds 207 one who is not abnormally improvident. 208 209 Hmmmm.... I knew there was some reason I was so weird. Now I 210 realize I'm not alone. 211 '-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-' The Jung and Restless '-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'- 212 ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// 213 How very odd to come home from school and find that someone has left 214 an entry IN MY NAME! There's no real problem, though. There was nothing 215 wrong with it that I can see. (It was also quite short and will probably 216 be forgotten quite soon). The record should be kept straight, however, so I 217 now point out for all to see that the "Petrov" entry concerning Kosta/Mary 218 Lamb was not entered by me. It's good to see that I (and the Petrov 219 personality) have not been forgotten. Careful readers would have noted 220 that the closing name "PETROV" was capitalized while I only capitalize 221 the "P". Keep a lookout for a Petrov entry in the near future--Petrov 222 has returned. 223 Petrov 224 //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// 225 (A ten line disclaimer for a one line entry?) 226 //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// 227 228 **************************************************************** 229 L'HOMME: Checked it out, and all works well, I think that maybe 230 what you are running up against here is that it is a VT100 emulation, 231 this means that if you want it to be other then numeric you MUST 232 select application mode. This is normally done by the remote computer 233 (PDP-11 or VAX) via a command string. You can do it from the Command : 234 prompt by entering the command 'PRINT ESC "="' which is the command 235 for the VT100 to switch to application mode. Again, make sure you put 236 the keyboard in num-lock to make it work. (What were you talking to 237 that wasn't switching the keypad to application even though it expected 238 it to be used?) 239 *********************** CISTOP MIKEY ********************************* 240 241 \'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/ 242 !!!isis!!! sorry to hear about the lung, I hope everyting is going alright 243 for you now... When do you get out? 244 Thanks again for the numbers. 245 \'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/\'/tim\'/ 246 ((())) ((())) ((())) ((())) 247 Since we were just given a short disertation on writers, here's a 248 quicky on reading: 249 250 Reading involves accompanying the author on a mental trip 251 to some selected destination, not a purposeless wandering through 252 an unintelligable maze. 253 254 ((())) ((())) ((())) ((())) 255 ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 256 Milch: Still waiting... 257 ?????????????? The Doctor ??????????????????????? June 15, 1985 at 10:08 ?????? 258 --P-- 259 {*}{*}{*}!!!isis!!!{*}{*}{*} 260 What, me churlish? Bless your little archetypical mind, Jung! I hadn't 261 ever seen that one before. Enjoyable. 262 I get out sometime today, so I am in a very good mood. Then I won't be 263 bugging BWMS quite so much, though I may be home for a little while coming 264 down off all of the drugs they have fed me. If you think my thought 265 patterns were distorted, you were right. 266 I am not altogether sure that I agree with the above comment on reading, 267 because of the often unsure relationship writing has to art in general. 268 One of the things that the art movements, especially minimalism and forward 269 from there, have taught us is that art may be performed for art's sake, 270 and need not always carry a profound message, am essage that often detracts 271 from the whole. This creates a very confusing situation as regards writing, 272 amking the borders between prose and poetry just that much fuzzier. 273 I am reminded of the experiment that several writers undertook (go awaa, 274 memory fog!) for the MMA in the late fifties. The assignment was to pen a 275 story that would fit on a regular postcard. All the critics ended up 276 doing was arguing which was poetry and which prose. Some of the examples 277 could definately have been termed conceptualist, even. 278 I know my views are on the radical perimeters, but let me make it clear 279 that none of this is an excuse for sloppiness, verbosity or any of the 280 other countless banes of our collective literary existence. (Index: am 281 I up to a 12, yet?) 282 {*}{*}{*}!!!isis!!!{*}{*}{*} 283 slavicca satrap enmakane 284 aufkasa selawitz usserparnav 285 markaswa ostawasw nazi otten 286 berber satarap enthrik 287 khamsi} nasahib awarswam 288 uswari jarrak mossari tharfewlin 289 naskarfam tewin awivetilean affar 290 291 tttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt 25.26.75 ttttt 292 293 *^#$*^#$*^)_#*^_)#*_)!@*%_+!%(_@%*_)@*^_)*@_)#^*_)!*%_)$^&*)_*$_)^*#$_ 294 Mikey: OK, I'll check it out again. I am glad it was my mistake and not 295 a bug in the program. 296 TIN MAN: Pleasure to meet you last night! Now about some of those jokes 297 you were telling... 298 Petrov: Baaaaa. If you get a chance rent the movie "Revenge of the Nerds." 299 There is a scene in it I think you would be very fond of. Baaaaa. 300 *%)#$*_)%*@)_%*_)@@_)%*@ L'homme sans Parity *%_)*%_)@#*%_)@*%_)@*%)_@ 301 **************************************** 302 Hi I was wondering if i was welcome on this system. Am I? Well if not just let 303 me know. 304 The Unnatural (My hearts made of Nutra-Sweet) 305 306 !#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@! 307 Well, I'll say that you are welcome. It may take 308 a while to be well-known, but have fun in the 309 meantime. 310 #@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!#@!@ 311 **************************************** 312 I cant leave my normal header since this system does not have my character 313 on it. I hope everything here at the inn are just dandy. Things have 314 been rather interesting here but I hear 315 things at the Inn have been rather interesting.... Such is life... 316 Well, back to lurk mode. 317 A happy day to all at the Inn. My glass is raised in salute..... 318 ********************* PaPa Smurf ******* 319 He crept up to the car, silently waite is what hooo!!! 320 --Words fall mouthlessly without a care. A child stares at me. She only sees 321 this image. She does not understand. Like grains of sand she falls away. Her 322 eyes are filled with fear. Ruefully I smile to stereotype my mind. And she... 323 the child of my enemy... she does not see; she can not find the heart within 324 me. Her blue eyes look to brown. A dark well of emptiness is what she sees. 325 Little girl, why do you fear, why can't you hear my pleas for understanding? 326 Why are you afeared at my sight? What might I do to you? "Take me away." 327 we say. And, that we do; we float away. Our eyes are locked to each other. 328 As you grab your mother's leg, you're pulled away. Your eyes are filled with 329 fear... of me. Such sadness what you see. I can not be another way. Is it 330 wrong to say, "I'm okay. Do not fear me"? 'Cause I'm afraid, too. If you look 331 inside me, I'm just like you. And, I'm afraid to be. You will never know. 332 I can not show you how I feel. You walk away, don't want to stay. How sad it 333 is. A little girl can break my heart and fill my mind with fear.-- 334 HI, HOW ARE YOU? 335 EXIT 336 EXIT 337 OFF 338 BYE BYE 339 HANG UP 340 ???? The Doctor ???? 341 ======================================================== 342 The dizzying feeling left as my stomach returned to 343 its normal position. The doors slid open again. The 344 numbers above the door no longer were light, now only a 345 single word was iluminated in a sickly yellow glow. 346 "Lobby". Something was very wrong here... I thought we 347 had started out at ground level in some sort of prison 348 cell, and here we are on the ground floor after a short 349 elevtor ride. Something about the lobby seemed very 350 familar too. Stepping out of the elevator, Pam grabbed 351 my hand, "Come on, let's get out of here before they 352 come after us!" She seemed to know where she was and 353 what was happening, so I followed her as she dragged me 354 towards the front doors. As we burst through front doors 355 of the building, we stepped outside to be confronted 356 with a large white marble statue of three playfull young 357 ladies, a lot of red brick, and a very smelly noisy 358 white and orange bus going by. 359 I was so stuned by the realization that we were 360 back in Portland that Pam nearly pulled my arm out of 361 its socket when I stopped dead in my tracks. "B bu bu 362 but how?" 363 "You idiot, they obviously flew us back while we 364 were drugged. Come on, let's get out of here!" 365 We hopped a bus heading east. As I sat down next to 366 Pam, I began to relax. Maybe, just maybe we actually got 367 away.... but that sickly laugh coming from the back of 368 the bus sounded very familar...... 369 ==================== Marvin Deepe ====================== 370 The Unnatural--> Welcome to BWMS from a sometimes un-welcome but always contentedly 371 lurking Inn-Habitant. 372 PaPa---> Please call. 373 374 090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909 375 I AM NOT A NUMBER - I AM A FREE MAN 376 HA - HA - HA - HA -HA 377 you are number nine 378 WHO IS NUMBER ONE? 379 there is no number one... 380 381 The haunting opening of an old british origeon tv series, brought up by 382 the association of anxiety and paranoia, rattled about in the back Carmichael 383 Sean's mind as his '72 stretched body 3/4 ton 5 speed, hydraulic clutch, manual 384 gear box small block 235 6-cylander chevy van sped down highway 395 north of 385 lakeview. 386 090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909 387 I highly recomend a walkabout to cinima-21 to see Ware the Green Ants Dreem 388 its playing all this week. cultural encounters. great story. characters... 389 *=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=* 390 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 391 isis -- monday a.m. I did not get the msg abt nerd-o-x till yesterday... 392 I'm glad you are making a prompt (by the numbers harch-two-three-four) 393 recovery. In apology, consider yourself the recepient of one very warm hug. 394 *=*=*= -- I'm sorry too. (But that's the risk in multi-author stories.) 395 I was stalling to give you time for an entry, will continue at my own pace 396 now. (Feel free to jump in if you see another opening.) 397 Monday morn -- gotta go, gotta work WORK? work. 398 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 399 --Patti-- 400 ????? The Doctor ????? 401 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 402 AS I LOOK AROUND THE INN, BACK FROM A LONG JOURNEY TO CORN VALLY, AND OSS YOU , 403 I FIND THE COUNTER OCCUPIED BY MANY DIFFERENT PEOPLE. I REST, THANKFULL THAT THI 404 S SOOTHING PLACE STILL EXISTS. 405 +++++++++++++++++++++++++0000000001TED++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 406 *************************************** 407 *************************************** 408 409 Well Hi, I have just a few questions 410 about this system. How do i skip the 411 messages before mine? Because it takes 412 20 minutes just to get to my first message. So if sombody would help me out I 413 would really be gratful. 414 415 Thanks 416 The Unnatural 417 Call Artesian Labs at 538-xxxx 418 call there or be square 419 420 Skippy? SKIPPY?? skippy??? Have you gotten your yacht tiller fixed yet? 421 Why are you looking at the messages here when you should be out working in 422 your non-existant garden with all of the weeds rearing their ugly heads into 423 the golden sun of the Yuppie Hills high above glorious SAN JOSE North?? 424 {}{}{}{}{} Some Questions Defy Answers {}{}{}{}{} Maynard G. Krebs {}{}{}{} 425 Isis? The sig was vague... Selectron is a small telephone interconnect 426 company located in Multnomah. I wouldn't really want to be associated 427 with such mercantile fershuggners. 428 ######################################################################### 429 to "skip msgs" try using the ln command (to get to the desired line) then 430 use PRINT to start printing at that point. You might try typing HELP & 431 (gasp) reading the directions.... 432 ___________________________________________________________________________ 433 HELLO? 434 THIS IS THE WIZARD GORT FROM THE LAND OF THE SOUTH. I HAVE BEEN EXILED 435 AND AM NOW RETURNING TO THIS KINGDOM AND BEG ENTRANCE. I HAVE BEEN AWAY 436 FOR A LONG TIME. CAN YOU HELP ME FIND THE OTHER WIZARDS OF THE BBS's? 437 PLEASE LEAVE MESSAGE FOR THE WIZARD GORT. 438 %^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^ 439 I too have just returned from the land down under. That cultural 440 center of the galaxy, Eugene Oregon. Art, music, theater, culture! 441 All can be had from very reasonable prices. All you have to do is 442 ask. It is great to be back in Portland, but this means you are 443 going to have to put up with a whole summer of everyone's favorite 444 and now much more mature computer user..........THE PHEONIX!!!!!!! 445 %^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^ 446 PS:It is great to be home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 447 *=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*X^N*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=* 448 Just in from Eugene person: I dont know what's supposed to be so great about 449 Portland. I dont mean to be down on the place ware I happen to be living BUT 450 at least in Eugene you can get chocklat egg creames! (or you could last time 451 I was there) 452 090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909090909 453 Instead of continuing south toward Alturas and it's driver's wooded moun- 454 tain childhood home beyond, the curivelinier, hardedged, psicodelic painted 455 early 70's extended body chevy van turned east, out into the black rock dessert 456 toward Denio. 457 Carmichael felt cleansed by the uncluttered vastness that streached out 458 befor him: cleansed of the mental clutter and sensory overload of urban life, 459 freed once more of the twin oppressors; stress and mundaneness, he felt himself 460 once more able to see and think clearly. When he spoke the proper phrase 461 at the town's one gas station, he was led to a combination shed and warehouse. 462 He was told to make himself compfortable thare, that others would join him 463 shortly. 464 The heavy sliding door was rolled shut on its track and, as he later des- 465 couvered, locked. 466 The interior walls of the 'L' shaped space he was in were unpainted gal- 467 vanized corregated steel and covered with a thick layer of dust as was the 468 cement slab floor. 469 At the other end of the other leg of the empty space was another side 470 rolling door which oppened into another dusty 'l' shaped space. This one 471 however was not empty. It held a heavy wood construction picknic table, the 472 kind usualy found in national parks. Thes, though it's surface was deeply 473 gouged and carved by uncountable generations on addolescents leaving thair mark 474 in the world, was non the less spotlessly clean. Set out on it was a fresh 475 salad in an intricatly carved, pollished and laqured large wooden bowel. There 476 were also two smaller bowls of similar design, eating utensels and condements. 477 Protruding from under one edge of the serving bowl ware it had been tucked 478 was a note. It simply said: " help yourself! " 479 *=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=* 480 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 481 Within the piper's body a war was taking place. If you listened close, 482 you could almost hear General Leukosite. 483 "Tenn Hut!" 484 "At ease, troops. We're fighting a number of containment actions today. 485 The sacrifice of all, even to the smallest platelet, is essential to our 486 victory. Get out there and DIE!" 487 "!!RAURHHH!!!" 488 The sound of the crowd cheering the general's speech was nearly overwhelming. 489 The ranked troops were nearly wild with enthusiasm, except for one trooper 490 not too near the center of the mass, near the rear. White cell first class 491 Harold Donevan, WHDC 11032-448643-33093, shrank within himself at the 492 warlike call. 493 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 494 495 ...and when you put your hand into a bunch of goo that was once the 496 onrushing disease ... you'll know what to do. that's all. 497 get well soon, piper! 498 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& the scarlet lion &&&&&&&&&&&& 499 500 Piper: I love it! Dr. Frankenstupe 501 =+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+ 502 503 --Patti-- 504 505 +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ 506 + As the wheel of life turns, there are times when strong winds of + 507 + change blow through one's life. Presently, in my life, it is the + 508 + tradewinds bringing new and exciting adventures. During the next + 509 + two weeks I'll be saying farewells to all my Portland friends, + 510 + then it's off to an island tropical paradise. The Backwater Inn + 511 + and all the friends I've met here retain a very special place in + 512 + my memory. If any of you wish to hear the irregular mummerings, + 513 + from a place where the sun shines first and always, be sure that + 514 + I have your address. (Call 286-xxxx during the next two weeks or + 515 + write ST. Thomas, U.S.V.I., 00801. This ole' sea + 516 + gypsy wishes you 'Fair winds & smooth seas'. + 517 + + 518 + /capt'n barefoot/ + 519 + (aka alchemist - Mesolithic Mathematician - Melissa - et. all) + 520 +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ 521 + P.S.-- L'homme, since virgins are in short supply it's definitely + 522 + paradise. + 523 +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ 524 525 +^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^HE DREW HIS SWORD, THEN SWUNG. A DIRECT\ 526 +^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^+ 527 HE DREW HIS SWORD, THEN SWUNG WITH ALL 528 HIS MIGHT. A DIRECT HIT. THE ORC'S 529 HEAD FLEW ACROSS THE STABLE AND INTO 530 A WATER TROUGH. HE WILL NEVER MESS WITH 531 ME THOUHGHT ZILMAR. ZILMAR SILENTLY 532 OPENED THE STABLE DOOR, THEN CREPT 533 BACK TO A LARGE BLACK STALLON. HE 534 JUMPED ON OUT OF THE STABLE AND INTO 535 THE FOREST. I'M FREE THOUGHT ZILMAR 536 AS HE RODE FURHTER AND FURTHER, BUT 537 THAT MY FRIENDS WAS ONLY THE BEGINING 538 OF ZILMAR PROOCH'S ADVENTURE!!! 539 +^+^+^+^+^+^+^+^THE ADVENTURESMAN+^+^+ 540 ?? YOSP ?? 541 ^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^ 542 Great, I leave for a little while and someone starts using my boarder. 543 Maybe it was never mine in the first place but... I don't mind if another 544 person is using the same boarder, just as long as the two of us aren't 545 mixed up. I have been writing poetry and will probably keep doing so 546 with or with out this boarder. If the Pheonix is too stuck on this 547 I'll change. Then again, who really notices anyway? 548 ^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%^%--to-->S$S$S$S$S$S$S$S$S$S$S$S$S$S$S 549 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 550 YOU POOR SLOBS PITYING YOURSELF ON HAVING TO LIVE IN EUGENE. WELL, YOU DON'T 551 KNOW WHAT LIVING IN A SMALL BACKWARDS TOWN THAT'S MAIN ENTERTAINMENT IS WATCHING 552 THE ELECTRICIAN COME DOWN FROM PORTLAND TO PLUG IN THE 1 STREET LIGHT IN TOWN 553 EVERY EVENING, IS LIKE. I HAVE HAD TO LIVE IN (UUGG, CORVALLIS) CORN VALLY FOR 554 THE PAST YEAR. THEY HAVE A TOTAL OF FOUR(4) BULLITEN BOARD SYSTEMS, THREE RUNNIN 555 DUPLICATE SOFTWARE, (FIDO NET) AND THEY THINK THAT THEY ARE ADVANCED. TWO OF THE 556 ESE BOARDS ARE OPERATED OUT OF O.S.U. AND THE OTHER TWO ARE WITHIN FOUR MILES OF 557 THE UNIVERSITY. AND THEY HAVE NO BWMS!!! THAT IS THE WORST CRIME.!! IF YOU TRY 558 TO GET AN ELECTRONIC PART, YOU ARE DAFFY. THE NATIVES THINK ROBOT IS A MIS-SPELL 559 ING OF A BOAT THAT GOES WITH OARS! THE LARGEST EXPORT IS GAS, EITHER PRODUCED BY 560 THE UNIVERSITY ADMINISTRATION, OR ROTTTING COW DUNG!! SPEAKING OF THE UNIVERSITY 561 DON'T GO DOWN THERE DURING THE SUMMER. THE TOWN CEASES TO EXIST! THEIR SOLE INCO 562 ME IS SPONGING OFF THE UNIVERSITY STUDENTS!! IN FACT, IT IS SO BAD, THE UNIVERST 563 Y HAD TO SET UP A COMMITTEE TO KEEP THE TOWNSPEOPLE BUSINESSMEN(THATS MEN) OFF 564 565 THE BACKS OF THE STUDENTS!! THIS IS BECAUSE THE UNIVERSITY IS EVEN MORE CROOKS. 566 I WARN YOU, PEOPLE, YOUR WALLET IS NOT SAFE IN THAT TOWN. 567 568 OH, WELL, WHAT CAN I DO, I HAVE TO GO BACK IN THE FALL(BOO HOO) 569 570 AN ANTI SMALL TOWNER,,, 571 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++00000000001TED+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 572 ++++++++++ YOSP, Doctor? My, we aren't dropping names, are we? 573 Bon Voyage, cap'n! ++++++++++++++++++++++++ Milchar ++++++++++++++++++++++++ 574 Themnax, old friend, I have been told that mayhap thou hast some interest in 575 some arcane object called a 'file'. 'Tis said that it is called "ESCSEQ" and 576 may be found in a place called "Omega Quadrant"? 577 .....................................the apprentice.......................... 578 #$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$#$# 579 580 ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 581 From Prometheus, Ponderous and not Pondergaard 582 My dear Cap'n, are you really leaving? This is sad, and it makes me regret 583 not having sent you three or four introductory messages. I did send a few when 584 you were using the name Melissa Atherton, but that really doesn't count. 585 I respected your debates with Laissez-Faire with a vengeance. Expect a few 586 letters to your position in the, er, Virgin Islands. 587 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 588 589 l'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oef 590 From the Egg comes life. Mysterious life, albeit very similar to you 591 own. From the Egg comes Fencer. He is life... 592 FENCER- COMING SOON TO A BWMS NEAR YOU! 593 l'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oeufl'oef 594 ??? YOSP ??? 595 <+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+> 596 Farewell Cap'n, You absence shall leave a void to be filled by none. 597 Good luck in paradise, and with the virgins (you might take a copy of the 598 Purity test along just in case!). 599 (Return from reading db) 600 Farely- From the UNXI System V Synopsis pg 24 under the heading 'DOCUMENT 601 PREPERATION SOFTWARE' sub heading 'WRITER'S WORKBENCH' 602 The UNIX system WRITER'S WORKBENCH Software help to analyze prose text 603 from indicated files and print out suggested corrections, giving line 604 numbers and contexts of any errors found. WRITER'S WORKBENCH INCLUDES: 605 - Programs to find abstractions, nominalizations, split infinitives, 606 acronyms, expletives, passives, ect. 607 - Programs to locate awkward phrases, sexists terms, frequently used words, 608 and double words. 609 - Programs that indicate punctuation and spelling errors. 610 - Programs to analyze sentence style and readability adn provide statistics. 611 - Programs to print information on English usage and help on a particular 612 topic. one line left, neat huh, will never replace folk like isis though!bye TOTAL NUMBER OF LINES = 612