LI FILE ON MARGIN IS 128 STATUS: ENTER ONLY NUMBER OF LINES: 545 1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask.... 2 ************************ REMOVED: 30 JUL 84 **************** 3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System) Mike Day system operator 4 ************************************************************ 5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION 6 PLACED ON THIS SYSTEM. 7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privately owned 8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public. 9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. As the system is 10 privately owned, I retain the right to remove any and all messages which 11 I may find offensive. Because of the limited size of the system, it will be 12 periodically purged of messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved) 13 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out of the 14 ENTER mode. The message is automatically stored. If after entering the 15 message you find you made a mistake, use the replace command to replace 16 the line. To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up. 17 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system. 18 ************************************************************ 19 20 IT'S BORING AT THE TOP 21 MAYBE I'LL TRY AGAIN LATER . 22 . 23 HELP !!!!! WHAT HAPPENED TO DRIVE B ????????????????? 24 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 25 Dearest Pam; 26 Please hurry! The neighbors are getting up a petition to throw me out 27 of the neighborhood. I'm completely out of raw meat. The kitty litter 28 doesn't work. The doo-doo is up to my knees, and my canary, Wilbur, is 29 missing. Oh God! I don't think I can stand it much longer. 30 Dr. Frankenstupe 31 P.S. I also accept Visa, Mastercharge, Diner's Club, or Mervyn's. 32 +_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_++_+_+_+__+_+__++_____+++*&%#$%$(>>>.. Awk! 33 Down! Down Thing!! 34 Oh no! Not again. 35 +_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_ 36 37 ,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`,`, 38 Bill the Cat Lives! 39 Have you ever noticed some of the striking similaritys between Bloom 40 County and Doonesbury? 'Fer instance, what about Bill? Hyped on drugs, 41 always out for a quick buck, and a great big hoopla after his death. 42 Sounds a lot like Ambassidor Duke! And now, they have both come back from 43 certain death. In fact, almost all the B.C. caracters have a counterpart 44 in Doonesbury. Look at this partial list... 45 Milo, journalist- Rick Redfrend, Post jounalist 46 Opus, a strange character- Zonker Harris, just as strange 47 Confused kid- Mike Doonesbury, kind of lost 48 (Milo's friend, I forgot the name.) 49 Quiche Loranne, Mankiller- Boopsie, Mike's girlfriend 50 51 The list goes on and on. Ponder that. Is Berkly Breathed really 52 GB Trudeau? Remember, Bill the Cat Lives! Bill the Cat Lives! 53 STAVING ARTIST. 54 ...................................................................... 55 WHAT HAPPENED TO DISC B? [*=*]. 56 ***********DRAGON QUEST***************************************************** 57 DRAGON QUEST IS DOWN UITL THE 8/2/84 YOU MITE HEAR A BISEY SOUND BECAUSE IT IS 58 OFF LIND 59 **************************************************************************** 60 OFF 61 EXTER 62 63 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/ 64 My, a definatly empty backwater today. 65 Alex:phone call? 66 MiG 67 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/ 68 -;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;--;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;- 69 STAVING(STARVING?)ARTIST: YES THE SIMILARITIES COULD GO FOR EVER. BUT IF AN 70 ARTIST IS WHAT YOU ARE, PERHAPS THE ONE THING WHICH MIGHT JUSTIFY YOUR 71 HYPOTHESIS HAS BEEN OVERLOOKED, NAMELY THE GRAPHIC DETAILING AND THE INKING. 72 FACIAL EXPRESSIONS, MOST NOTABLY THE EYES, NOSES AND MOUTHS, ARE A DEAD 73 GIVEAWAYS. IF YOU EXAMINE CROCK, B.C. AND THE WIZARD OF ID YOU NOTE THAT 74 THEY ARE QUITE SIMILAR. NOE IT DOESN'T TAKE SHERLOCK TO POINT OUT THAT ALL 75 OF THE AFOREMENTIONED HAVE THE SAME WRITERS AND/OR ARTISTS, BUT THE IDEA IS 76 TO SHOW THAT PEN NAMES CAN BE USED BY THOSE WHO DRAW AS WELL. SO ANYWAY-- 77 DOES THE LACK OF MATERIAL ON DRIVE B MEAN THAT THE COLLAPSE OF MCKANES' 78 EMPIRE IS COMPLETE? HMMMMM. 79 FIN LOOKED AT THE WALL AND CONTEMPLATED HOW THE LIBIYAN FREELANCE AGENTS' 80 ASSOCIATION WOULD TAKE THE IDEA OF SPACE TRAVEL. THEY HAD BEEN A RELUCTANT 81 GROUP OF DISSIDENTS, NOT WANTING TO CHANGE THEIR WAYS FROM THOSE OF THE 82 LATE 1990'S WHEN THEY HAD REALLY BEEN AT THEIR BEST, BUT SINCE THE 2035 83 ACCORD CONDEMNING TERRORISM AND PLACING A DEATH SENTENCE UPON TERRORISTS 84 BUSINESS HAD BEEN SLOW ON EARTH. THE $500,000 REWARD FOR TURNING IN A 85 BONIFIDE TERRORIST HELPED ALSO. THE PHONE RANG TWICE, THEN WAS ANSWERED 86 BY A WOMAN WITH A DEFINITE BROOKLYN ACCENT. FIN SPENT THE FORMALITIES 87 NEEDED BY WORD OF MOUTH AND GAVE A CREDIT NUMBER. AFTER HANGING UP THE 88 PHONE HE LOOKED AT LASETER, WHO HAD HIS FACE PRESSED AGAINST THE 500 89 GALLON AQUARIUM GLASS, OBSERVING NOTHING IN PARTICULAR. 90 "WELL MY BOY! WE'VE GOT 50 AGENTS BEING BRIEFED RIGHT NOW. WHEN THEY'VE 91 FINISHED THEY'LL HOP THE NEXT SHUTTLE OUT AND WE'LL BE ON OUR WAY!" FIN 92 WAS SMILING FROM ONE SIDE OF HIS FACE TO THE OTHER. HE BEGAN TO HUM AN 93 OLD SPACERS TUNE AND STEEPLE HIS HANDS. LASETER LOOKED OVER HIS SHOULDER 94 AND FROWNED. "NOT TO BE ANTICLIMACTIC OLD FELLOW, BUT WHERE DO YOU GET 95 THIS "WE" STUFF? AS FAR AS THIS ENTERPRISE YOU'VE GOT IN MIND GOES, IT'S 96 GOING WITHOUT ME! THAT LITTLE EPISODE IN THE SLUDGE TANKS DID IT FOR ME." 97 THE LOOK OF DISGUST ON LASETERSS' FACE SAID THE REST. FIN SAT BEHIND THE 98 DESK, GRINNING LIKE A CHESHIRE CAT. "I'M SORRY YOU FEEL THAT WAY, BUT I 99 BELIEVE THAT YOUR CONTRACT COVERS THIS. I QQUOTE PARAGRAPH 17, SUBPARA- 100 GRAPH A: " IN THE EVENT THAT THE PARTY OF THE SECOND PART (THAT'S YOU) 101 SHOULD FAIL TO DELIVER THOSE GOODS FOR WHICH THEY ARE HELD ACCOUNTABLE 102 FOR, THEN THE PARTY OF THE SECOND PART (AHEM! THAT'S ME!!) WILL HAVE THE 103 RIGHT TO PLACE THE PARTY OF THE FIRST PART UNDER THE CUSTODY OF THE NEAREST 104 INTERSPACIAL LAW AGENCY UNTIL SUCH TIME AS THE GOODS LOST SRE RECOVERED 105 OR PAYED FOR." LASETER LEAPED ACROSS THE ROOM."YOU LITTLE FREELOADER!! 106 I DON'T RECALL SIGNING ON WITH YOU. I DON'T EVEN RECALL THE CONTRACT!!" 107 FIN SLOWLY SHRUGGED HIS SHOULDERS " THERE IT IS, MY BOY, IN BLACK AND 108 WHITE. AND I DO BELIEVE YOU'LL FIND THE LOCAL JUDGE TO BE QUITE ADAMANT 109 ABOUT ENFORCING THE LAW" LASETER WAS READY TO SWEAR THAT FIN WAS STARTING 110 TO FADE FROM VIEW. HIS MIND WAS WORKING AT A FURIOUS RATE, TRYING TO COME 111 UP WITH A WAY OUT. HE KNEW HE WAS CAUGHT, BUT HE WASN'T READY TO GIVE IN 112 WITHOUT SOME CONCESSION FROM FIN. THERE HAD TO BE AN ANSWER. HE HAD TO 113 STALL FOR TIME."LET ME THINK ABOUT IT, OKAY?" FIN SMILED, "BUT OF COURSE, 114 OF COURSE!! I WOULDN'T DREAM OF COERCING YOU INTO SOMETHING YOU DON'T 115 WISH TO DO, JUST BE READY TO GO BY 7 TOMORROW MORNING. NOW I REALLY MUST 116 BE GOING, MUCH TO AND SO LITTLE TIME TO DO IT IN!" AND WITH THAT HE MADE 117 READY TO EXIT, "OH AND ONE OTHER THING: THE FLIGHT DECK HAS BEEN BRIEFED 118 AND THE TRANSPORTER OFFICE NOTIFIED THAT YOU ARE ON A TEMPORARY VISA HOLD 119 JUST IN CASE YOU FELT THE URGE TO GO ON A JAUNT" HE SMILED ONCE MORE AND 120 LEFT, WITH LASETER WATCHING HIS BACK. A VERY DARK MOOD DESCENDED UPON HIM. 121 -;-;--;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;--;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-; 122 jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj 123 Sob! All the great works form drive B gone! I think I'll cry. 124 Voyeur: I'll be coming to the PorSFiS meeting form Cedar Mill. Maybe I 125 could pick up your sunglasses from Alex. 126 All: Anyone want to get in on the BW archive buy? I've got the $25 and am 127 prepared to fork it over Saturday. However, that money was going to buy 128 food being as I spent my archive money replacing a blown up engine. If 129 anyone can get the $25 to L'hommes by Saturday at the PorSFiS meeting, 130 the've bought me out. 131 L'Homme: I'll have the money Saturday. 132 The Ninja 133 jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj 134 *%)_#@*%_*@#_%@#_*%_@*(%+@#(%_@#*%_*@#_%*_$*^_*^_#$(_^*#$_^*#$_*^#_*^_*^#$_*^ 135 Ninja: OK...I will be waiting for the money. One question. You say you spent 136 $25 on a blown engine. What kind of engine only costs $25 to rebuild? Last 137 time I checked on engine rebuilds, they were in the price range of $750-$1000. 138 What is your engine, a 0.49 Cox??? 139 Mikey: To repeat the above, what happened to drive b? If it is lost and gone 140 forever, I have up to around line 450 in mint condition, untouched by human 141 hands. 142 *%)$*#)%*#)%*$)@ L'homme sans parity *)$*#@)$*#)*$@)*$)$#@*$@#*$_@#*_$*_*$@_#$* 143 :::::::::::::::::::::O O::::::::::::::::::::::O O:::::::::::::::::::::::: 144 Mikey: and I have what L'homme doesn't have, down thru Petrov's 145 entry (around line 620, as I recall). 146 L'homme: Didn't you know? Ninja blew the engine on his '67 Mustang. 147 He must not have shopped around, though - I'm sure he could have gotten 148 a better deal than $25. Maybe K-Mart, I think they have them for $20, or 149 two for $35. 150 ::::::::::::::::::::O O::::::::::::voyeur:::::::::::O O:::::::::::::::::: 151 Oops, just remembered - I have Petrov's entry, but not the one preceeding it 152 ([*=*], as I recall, the story with the raccoon etc) 153 ::::::::::::voyeur:::::: 154 [*=*]. VOYEUR: SNIFF, CRY,WEEP, ETC, ETC 155 156 ::::::::::::::O O::::::::::::::::: 157 Well, since RYRY left this big gap here, I'll just sqeeze in here and 158 save some room. After going back and looking at what I have downloaded, 159 I have thru line 526 (the end of the Gaudy Minsky entry), plus the Petrov 160 entry. Sorry about that, [*=*]. (thats line 545 if you count the logon msg, which I never save) 161 Ninja: if you want, you are welcome to stop at Alex's and get my glasses. 162 If not, it looks like I may be back out there in two weeks, so MAYBE 163 I can wait. Re archives - maybe PAM would be interested? :::O O::voyeur:::O O: 164 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY 165 I am not normally a violent person. I do NOT believe in using force 166 to solve my problems. 167 *H*O*W*E*V*E*R* 168 If I discover that the loss of the contents of drive B was NOT an accident, I 169 may just make an exception for the benefit of the party or parties "responsible". 170 Ian MacHinery 171 RYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRYRY 172 173 {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{} 174 Well shtoner, your rebuttle was certainly in character. Complete 175 with misquotes, misspellings, and miseverything. You don't seem 176 to realize the content of your messages relagates you to one of 177 what the MiG character on the bulletin board calls a twit. The 178 public place where I posted your earlier messages was not computer- 179 ized, it was printed off and taped to the company notice board. 180 The comments from my fellow workers ranged from "Where did you get 181 this junk?", to "What grade level is this? 3? 4? 5?" As you can 182 see these are in biased opinions. These people obviously can have 183 no personal malice towards you, yet they said what they said. Can 184 you refute this evidence? Can you tell me with all honesty that 185 you knew what you were writing? And your comment about the first 186 message being entered at a party. I don't know about you, but 187 when I went to a lot of parties in my late teens, the last thing 188 we did at them was screw around with computers. Will you dare 189 reply? 190 Howard Johnson 191 {}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{{{}{}{}{} 192 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 193 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 194 Now that we have the mind gems, there is nothing we can't accomplish! We can 195 rule the galaxies from our planet and you'll never find us! Universal control 196 is but a heartbeat away! Heh heheheheheheh!!!!!!!!!!! SPACE PIRATES 197 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 198 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 199 YOU MAY HAVE MIND GEMS, BUT IF WE CAN JUST CONVINCE EVERYONE TO STOP WEARING ALL GEMS YOU CAN NEVER GAIN CONTROL. 200 *********************************************************************************: 201 WELL, DRIVE B IS BACK. I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED, BUT AT LEAST THE DATA 202 WASN'T LOST. SOMEHOW THE END OF DISK POINTER GOT CLEARED TO ZERO. POSSIBLY 203 BECAUSE OF A WRITE ERROR TO THE CONTROL SECTOR. ANYWAY, I AM GOING TO 204 RETIRE THE DISK AFTER IT IS ARCHIVED OUT OF PARANOIA. I'D RATHER BE SAFE 205 THEN SORRY. 206 207 PAM: WOULD YOU LIKE COPIES OF THE ARCHIVES? IF YOU ARE WORRIED ABOUT 208 SECURITY, WE CAN DO WHAT I DID WITH D LAST YEAR, AND MAIL IT TO YOU 209 THROUGH A THIRD PARTY, THUS MAINTAINING YOUR SECURITY. (I CAN SEND 210 IT FOURTH CLASS TO KEEP MAIL COSTS DOWN TO AROUND $10 OR SO IF YOU WANT 211 PAPER COPIES, ELSE YOU WILL HAVE TO MAKE A DEAL WITH SOMEONE AROUND HERE 212 TO GET IT ON ATARI FORMAT, IBM, OR WHAT EVER ELSE YOU LIKE. I WILL STILL 213 HANDLE THE MAILING IF YOU WISH, OR SOMEONE ELSE CAN DO IT.) 214 OR DELIVER THEM BY HAND, OR WHATEVER OTHER METHOD YOU DEEM ACCEPTABLE. 215 I KNOW YOU HAD EXPRESSED A DESIRE TO GET THEM IN THE PAST, SO HERE IS 216 YOUR OPORTUNITY OF A 1/100TH LIFE TIME..... 217 ************************* CISTOP MIKEY *************************************: 218 :=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=::=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=: 219 So much for the religeous discussion. What is it now? 220 I haven't been keeping track on the elections but I think if 221 Mondle were to be shot and killed a day after his term began, 222 we would have the first normal person in the white hose as 223 president in years. 224 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 225 No pascal programers??/?? 226 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 227 Milchar: I think people do run in cycles, sort of. 228 while they seem to repeat previous actions not knowing what 229 they are doing. 230 :=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=:=: 231 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 232 Pascal Programmer person: I dabble in it, but it has been a L O N G time. Describe your problem, MAYBE I can help. 233 All: Hooray! I have my disk drive today! Much better than cassette! Still is slow, but relatively speaking it is 234 very fast. 235 Entered this day of July 26 at 10:22 pm, Milchar. 236 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 237 To all of you wonderful people with Money: 238 I wish to sell my Zenith Z-100. It has the color ROMs (nice graphics), 239 192K of RAM, two 5-1/4" floppy drives, and the Multiplan program. Both CP/M 240 and MS-DOS are included. All of that for $1800! Call Jim at 646-xxxx 241 242 243 VOYEUR,OR ANYONE,: I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE A HARDCOPY OF THE ARCHIVES 244 OF THE LAST MONTH OR SO. PARTICULARLY MY ENTRIES AS THE 245 TRAVELER. MUCH OF THIS WAS WRITTEN SPONTANEOUSLY, AND I DIN'T 246 HAVE IT WRITTEN DOWN, EXCEPT FOR NOTES. WHAT WOULD IT COST? [*=*] 247 ---------------------------------------- 248 "will I dare reply?" what a tag line, if I do not, yyou can denounce me 249 more, if I do, you get more of my obveously funny entries. 250 As for refuteing the evidence, how could I when I know not if they have been 251 indeed posted or you are making this all up. Why don't you tell me where the 252 commons board is, and what company?. Yes, I knew what I was writing, I wrote it! 253 As for the party, the prime entertainment is computers/physics and getting 254 high, in that order. This is being entered at 4:29 a.m. after said party. 255 Did you have easy access to computers when you were a teen? 256 If my last entry was in character, what would be out of character? that last 257 message was as far out of character as I have ever been, trying to end an argument 258 with obveously no easy ending. I am glad that my entries help liven up the 259 day for you folks, I know what a boring job is like, having worked now for 3 years. 260 --------shtoner------------------------- 261 *:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*: 262 ITS BEEN A LONG TIME. I HAVE EVEN BEEN OUT OF THE COUNTRY. BUT ITS GOOD TO 263 KNOW THAT SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE. PEOPLE HERE STILL TALK IN LITTLE FLITCHES. 264 LURKERS STILL PRESIDE. I STILL CAN'T SPELL. AND A HINT OF A STORY HERE 265 AND THERE IS STILL TO BE FOUND. BOY HOW I HAVE MISSED THE LESS THAN AVERAGE 266 THINGS THAT GO ON IN DAY TODAY AVERAGE LIVES. ITS GOOD TO BE HOME. 267 *:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:-:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:*:* 268 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 269 The single light bulb illuminates a wisp of smoke curling up from the 270 innards of a defunct Apple. Bent over the ailing machine, a tired figure 271 recoils DAMN! 272 The smell of singed flesh fills the air as he sucks the injured finger. 273 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 274 275 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/ 276 Piper:I fixed apples where I once worked as a janitor for a few months. 277 Want some help? If you tell me what chip number was just branded on your finger 278 and what the machine does/doesn't do I can probably narrow it down. 279 MiG 280 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/ 281 Shtoner:At least clean up the ends of your lines! If you can't finish 282 the word then erase the partial word and RE-TYPE it on the next line. 283 ................................................................................ 284 ::::::::::::::::::::::::O O::::::::::::::::::::::O O::::::::::::::::::::: 285 [*=*] : I went back through my disks, and the first entry I could find 286 of yours in the traveller & raccoon story was made July 17th. I counted 287 5 entries, totalling 193 lines. It would be no major problem for me to 288 print that out (3 or 4 pages.) If you want copies of the entire disks, that's 289 out of my league. Talk to one of the monied persons here. Do you want 290 your rather interesting dissertation on the fine art of writing? 291 That's another 50 lines, still no problem. 292 If you are who I think you are, I can give them to you at PC&S tomorrow 293 if you are interested. 294 :::::::::::::::::::::::::O O::::::::voyeur:::::::::O O::::::::::::::::::: 295 NEW YORK (AP) The SEC today announced the planned merger of the ailing 296 McKane Industries with Wassir Toilet Plungers Inc. A spokesman for 297 WPT Inc, Henry M. Pinkstaff, stated; "This is essentially a bail-out 298 situation. We believe that McKane Industries is a basically sound 299 company caught in a credit crunch arising from the rumors of Leroy 300 McKane's death. This merger can only help both companys." It is also 301 reported that the top management personnel of McKane Industries will 302 retain their positions without loss of salary or benefits. The merger 303 is subject to SEC approval. 304 305 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 306 307 [*=*] VOYEUR. I WOULD LIKE THAT VERY MUCH, INCLUDING THE 'DISERTATION'. 308 THANKS! (I PROBABLY AM WHO YOU THINK I AM, I FIGURED ANYONE WHO 309 WONDERED, KNEW EVEN THOUGH I HAVE 310 DISGUISED MY SELF-I FIXED THE "S" KEY THAT USED TO STICK!.[*=*] 311 (AKA DELTA FIVE. PS ARE YOU IN TOUCH WITH DREAMTOUCHER? 312 ;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-; 313 Laseter was by now furious. he knew it was more than just Fins' audacity 314 and what he had done to keep him under thumb. Laseter didn't like being 315 cooped up or told he couldn't knowing full well that should he chose too 316 do so, he could. He shoved his hands in his pockets to keep them from 317 fidgeting and found that one them still held the key. A grin split his 318 face and he pulled it out. Fin would come unhinged when he figured out 319 what had happened. He began to recite the words......... 320 ;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;-; 321 JoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshua 322 While L'homme and I were loitering around the NET branch 323 office, waiting for our audience with Ian, I browsed through a 324 copy of the OREGONIAN (Friday, July 27th, 1984) I found in the 325 library. I was curious about what kind of things happen out 326 there in the sticks. Sure enough, right there on page C3 was 327 a picture and article about pigs at a county fair. Jeez, the 328 yokels probably didn't even know about the death of McKane! 329 Then another article on the same page caught my eye: 330 331 `HOT' MERCURY FEARED STOLEN 332 333 RICHLAND, Wash. -- Five plastic quart containers of used 334 and radioactive mercury are missing from the Hanford Nuclear 335 Reservation and may have been stolen, UNC Nuclear Industries 336 said Thursday. 337 The company reported the missing containers to the U.S. 338 Department of Energy and said the poisonous mercury was 339 "missing and suspected stolen and probably removed from the 340 Hanford site." 341 342 "Well, L'homme, looks like we know where the mercury 343 came from for McKane's lethal thermometer. If Ian doesn't have 344 anything for us, maybe we should check it out." 345 L'homme thought, then commented, "I doubt that we are the only 346 ones to make the connection. We'd probably be fighting the FBI, 347 the CIA, and every other acronym for details on the story. 348 Personally, I'd rather go after that (expletivew deleted) 349 Petrov!" 350 I shrugged and sat back to finish the article, while 351 wondering what info Ian might have for us in the upcoming meeting. 352 JoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshuaJoshua 353 MR. HOWARD DIAVISON, EDITOR, OKLAHOMA CITY 'OKLAHOMAN', DEAR 354 MR DIAVISON: I HOPE YOU WILL UNDERSTAND THAT I CAN NOR RE- 355 VEAL MY IDENTITY, AS TO DO SO 356 WOULD CAUSE ME TO LOSE MY JOB, AND 357 MAYBE EVEN MY LIFE. IEMPLOYED AT THE COUNTY MEDICAL 358 EXAMINERS OFFICE, AND WAS AT MY JOB THE DAY OF THE AUTOPSY 359 360 OF MR. MCKANE.MCKANE WAS NOT KILLED BY AN "EXPLODING THERMOM- 361 ETER". THIS RUMOR WAS STARTED BY AN AGENCY OF THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT R REASONS I DON'T KNOW. THE REAL CAUSE OF HIS DEATH 362 WAS, IN FACT, PERITONITIS, FROM A COLON INFECTION, HOWEVER- THE 363 CAUSE OF THE INFECTION WAS THE RESULT OF A CENTURIES OLD 364 CHINESE ASSASINATION METHOD. THE KILLER COILS UP SMALL BAMBOO SHOOTS, AND TIES THEM WITH A 365 PIECE OF SILK THREAD, AND THEN PLACES THEM INSIDE CHUNKS OF 366 SWEET AND SOUR PORK. WHEN THE SILK DISSOLVES IN THE DIGESTIVE 367 SYSTEM, THE BAMBOO STRAIGHTENS OUT, AND CAUSES TINY PUNCTURES THROUGHOUT THE LARGE INTESTINE. 368 THE RESULT IS, OF COURSE, PERITONITIS, AND IS A SLOW AND 369 EXTREMELY PAINFUL WAY TO DIE. RUMORS ARE THAT SOMEONE WHO WAS EMPLOYED IN A LOCAL RESTAURANT PLACED THE BAMBOO IN MCKANE 370 S FOOD.HOPE THIS IS USEFUL TO YOU. A FRIEND 371 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/ 372 [*=*] there are few who even know where DREAMTOUCHER is living and he does 373 not have a phone. He does however come to PorSFiS meetings. 374 MiG 375 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/ 376 help 377 I am lost 378 enter 379 ***************************** 380 New BBS: CBBS/ALOHA Phone 649-xxxx 24 hours 381 ***************************** 382 some people on this system don't know when to shut the &%$# up!!! Some 383 guy tells this story to the maximum 629 lines of DAta. Pretty boring if 384 you ask me!!! 385 386 Quit being such boring people, people. Otherwise, The cursor will develop 387 a horrible case of anerorexia from being 388 overtyped. 395 <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 396 ALL Archive: We are ready! Oficially, Aaron, Steve, Dave, Leonard. And 397 possibly Ninja, Steve S., DJJ, d, and Duffy. If the possiblies could 398 contact the officialies; we will be in business. Having perused the printed 399 archive sitting in a brighter-than-average corner of *THE* inn, I can 400 promise all ARCHIVERS a treat beyond the touted and fortold glimmerings from 401 the "premium no-lead" archive promoters. Truly an education. 402 Aaron 403 <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> 404 jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj 405 Those who made fun of my car: I have a '75 Fiat (Fix it again Tony) 124 406 sports coup. I lost two pistons and the head. Luckily, I have a 407 brother who is a mechanic at freeway FIAT and got me parts at cost. 408 after his fees, it cost me $400 to fix my car. Anyway, I had to dip 409 into the archive money as well as any other money that was handy. 410 (I owe CIS quite a bundle, too) 411 Voyeur: I'd get your glasses, but it's too late to tell me where Alex lives. 412 [*=*]: Let me take a stab at your identity. Did we scheme to still an 11/70 413 on a moped one time? 414 The Ninja 415 jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj 416 tttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt 417 Rocky seemed unaware that with Wassir's arms shipment and the 418 key to the stocks, he had a lot of power. All he could think 419 about was disguises for his meeting with this brother. The 420 more I watched him and listened to his exotic voice the more 421 I thought, "he can't possibly be a criminal. His attention 422 span is too short." I had to get him to throw his resources 423 to the good guys. But who WERE the good guys? 424 PREMISES: 425 1. Most NET agents are good guys. 426 2. Petrov is a NET agent some of the time. 427 3. Joshua and L'homme are NET agents all of the time. 428 4. That Wassir is a terrorist is true. 429 5. All terrorists are not good guys. 430 6. All good guys are not bad. 431 7. Rocky's not bad at all in his soccer player disguise. 432 8. You can fool some Albanians all of the time. 433 9. All NET agents are mortal. 434 CONCLUSIONS: 435 Wassir is for sure a bad guy & maybe sometimes Petrov, but 436 probably not L'homme & Joshua but you never can tell & Rocky 437 mostly just does whatever he feels like. 438 I decided to abandon logic and rely on my gut instincts and 439 rapier wit. I got Rocky to disguise himself as a stockbroker 440 and we headed over to the Plaza. I was hoping to find a way 441 to get Rocky's assets into the right hands before Hon. M. 442 got to them and gave them to some ego-maniac with no morals. 443 With any luck at all, Petrov would turn out to be an ego-maniac 444 with a conscience. 445 Gaudy Minsky 446 tttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt 447 *)#*%_@*%_$(%+@$(^_$*^_#@(^+!(^+!#(^+(_#^(#+^_$%(^_%$(&_%()@&+(_&*@_(&_%(&_(#(&_(_$(&_%$(&_!(#&_(%_(&_@(&_(&_%#(&_%( 448 "Be seated gentlemen." Ian had the type of voice that could bring wild dogs to their knees. When Ian spoke, most of 449 NET listened. 450 Present at the meeting was myself, Joshua, Ian, NET 06, who's real name turns out to be Gregory, NET 03, our 451 phone company agent, and an unidentified woman. As we took our seats, Ian flipped a switch on the arm of his chair, 452 causing the lights to go out, a screen to appear, and a projector to come to life. 453 "The files you see before you contain pertinent information regarding the entire Mckane operation. Everything remotely 454 involving this case has been gathered, compiled, cross-compiled, and interpreted. These files should be 455 memorized and understood down to the last iota of information. These slides contain germane information just received by 456 outside NET operatives. Please read and memorize everything very carefully while I elaborate." Ian removed a paper 457 from a special folder, and with the aid of a small flashlight, read to us its contents. 458 "With our blessings, Bunker Hunt delivered his speech to the SBAC, and as we expected, the Dow Jones went through the 459 roof. It might interest you to know that the NET made 700 million on the deal. WE have contacted the SEC, and are 460 putting friendly but firm pressure on them to nix the possible merger deal between McKane and the albanian toilet 461 interest. We have managed to secure photographs of Rocky entertaining known McKane agents, and are closing in on tieing 462 up that loose end." 463 In the dim light, I could see Joshua's face cringe at the end of Ian's latest revelation. 464 "We are also in the process of securing very damaging papers regarding the McKane organization from a disgruntled former 465 employee." 466 The lights came back on and the screen returned to its hiding place in the wall."And now for the assignments" 467 This is the part I always dreaded the most. What would it be this time? Beruit to look for stolen Holiday Inn towels? 468 Canada to look for missing beer? Or maybe Cincinatti to look for missing hitting? What ever it was, I dreaded it with 469 every bone in my body. 470 "NET 03, you return to the phone company, and keep those taps going. You are a prime source of information. NET 06, 471 you are headed for Tripoli. I want you to find out more about this Albanian character Wassir. And this time don't let 472 your brother-in-law get the best of you! L'homme, Joshua, for you I save the best. I want both of you to head up to 473 Oregon. 474 "Oregon?", I ask. "You mean the land of whoop whoop and rust?" 475 "The same.", continued Ian, without missing a beat. "Our information shows that Oregon contains the largest and most 476 important circle of prayer facility in the country. We need to neutralize this religious enterprise ASAP. Your target 477 is a guru named Rajneesh Dangerfield. A man who claims to get no respect, but don't let it fool you. You will find 478 the commune in the city of RAINdeer. The rest of the information is in your folders. By the way, your car was impounded 479 by the city, but we have recovered it. It is waiting in the garage. You will find a nice surprise for you concerning 480 the speed and handling of the car. I suggest you drive to Oregon. You will make it in 1 day, I assure you." 481 "What about her...", I asked, and was just as abrubtly cut off by Ian. 482 "Don't concern yourself. Now off you go. And don't forget the new comset code!" 483 Joshua and I headed for the garage, where according to Ada, our baggage and weapons were waiting for us in the trunk. 484 "Have fun", she winked as we left the main floor of the complex. 485 "Yea...fun..." I thought, as we made our way to the start of our next mission. 486 *%*)_*_@*%_@*# L'homme sans parity - Je me dirige vers aventure! *%)*%)#$*%) 487 488 [*=*] PLNKA: NO. 489 [*=*] 490 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/ 491 Aaron:I hope I can laugh at my past mistakes, all 5 million k of them! 492 PorSFiS:maybe, looks like 35% or so. 493 MiG 494 ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?/ 495 some of your messages are gramaticzally incorrect and do not makesense. 496 because of this, as a beginner, i have a hard time understanding 497 what to do. any advise? thanks. 498 ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 499 I can't say as I understood that very much either! 500 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 501 [*=*][*=*][*=*][*=*][*=*][*=*][*=*][*=*][*=*][*=*][*=][*=*][*=*] 502 THE LAKE WAS MUCH WIDER THAN IT WAS WAS LONG, ANS AS SEEN FROM THE 503 ISTANCE, DECEPTIVELY SO. NOW, AS I SAT ON MY ROCK, WITH THE WAVES L 504 LAPPING AT MY FEET, I BEGAN TO REALIZE THAT CROSSING IT WAS NOT GOI 505 NG TO BE AS EASY AS I HAD THOUGHT. I COULD SWIM IT EASILY ENOUGH, 506 BUT THE MAP WOULD BE RUINED FROM HOURS IN THE WATER. AND WHAT OF MY 507 COMPANION? COULD A RACCOON SWIM SUCH A DISTANCE, COULD HE SWIM AT 508 ALL? THE THOUGHT OF LEAVING HIM BEHIND SADDENED ME, AS I HAD BOCOME 509 VERY FOND OF HIM- THE WAY HE YAWNED AT ME, JUST AS I REALIZED IT 510 WAS TIME TO GET GOING, AND THE WAY HE CAVORTED PLAYFULLY ABOUT IN 511 THE MEADOW, CHASING BUTTERFLIES----. THEN, SUDDENLY, MY FATHERS 512 WORDS ECHOED FROM OUT OF THE PAST, AND A GRIM DETERMINATION SET IT. 513 I MUST NOT FAIL.IT WAS TIME TO GET GOING. AS I STARTED TO RISE I 514 SAW A WATER SKATE SCAMPERING ACROSS THE STILL SURFACE OF A TINY 515 POOL, CAUGHT BETWEEN THE ROCKS. HOW I ENVIED HIS ABILITY TO WALK 516 ACROSS THE WATER. A CURLED LEAF BOBBED UP AND DOWN AT THE EDGE OF 517 'MY' ROCK. AN ANT WAS CRAWLING BACK AND FORTH-TRAPPED, I THOUGHT, 518 SEEKING A WAY OUT, AND SUDDENLY A PICTURE APPEARED IN MY MIND. I 519 SPRANG UP FROM MY ROCK, AND RAN ALONG THE ROCKY SHORE TO WHERE THE 520 BULLRUSHES GREW. REEDS! I COULD BUILD A LITTLE RAFT, TO HOLD THE 521 BOOK, AND MY COMPANION TOO! I SET ABOUT MY TASK WITH GREAT 522 ENTHUSIASM, AND SOON IT WAS COMPLETED. I LEFT MY LITTLE CAMP AS IT 523 WAS, AND PLACING MY RUCKSACK, AND CLOTHES ON THE RAFT, AND LASTLY 524 MY COMPANION, WHO DIDN'T SEEM TO DISTURBED AT ALL. THEN I SLIPPED 525 INTO THE COOL WATER, AND PUSHED AWAY FROM THE EDGE. HOW STRANGE 526 THIS MUST APPEAR, I THOUGHT, BUT IT WOULD WORK, AND, ONCE AGAIN, 527 WE WERE ON OUR WAY. 2BCONT'D[*=*][*=*][*=*][*=*][*=*][*=*][*=*] 528 -+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+- 529 Mr. Haflinger - I read your book last night (All of it!). I think 530 I see why you like it. You identify with the hero, don't you? 531 You also envy his abilities with computers. Yes, I definitely 532 see similarities between you and him. 533 If I see you in the near future, we can discuss this further. 534 +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ 535 :*************************************************************: 536 LeRoy: Everything is going as anticipated. Hunt is satisfied 537 with your plan. The speech went very well and he's about to 538 cash in. The NET was thrown into total confusion; they're just 539 now starting to recover. The SEC chairman has been taken care 540 of and the merger is assured. Everything is going like 541 clockwork, no serious difficulties in sight. Monsieur d'Autun 542 :************************************************************: 543 ------------------------------------------------------------------ 544 Things seldom workout the way people would like them to. 545 ------------------------------------------------------------------ >