LIST FILE ON MARGIN IS 80 STATUS: ALL ALLOWED NUMBER OF LINES: 627 1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask.... 2 *********************** REMOVED: 11 MAR 84 ***************** 3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System) Mike Day System operator 4 ************************************************************ 5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION 6 PLACED ON THIS SYSTEM. 7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privatly owned 8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public. 9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. As the system is 10 privatly owned, I retain the right to remove any and all messages which 11 I may find offensive. Because of the limited size of the system, it will be 12 periodically purged of messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved) 13 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out of the 14 ENTER mode. The message is automatically stored. If after entering the 15 message you find you made a mistake, use the replace command to replace 16 the line. To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up. 17 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system. 18 ************************************************************ 19 20 Future Doctor: please us 80 columns for your uploads as the system is limited by 21 the number of lines rather than the amount of text. 22 23 Jonathan Chance: I suggest you study the situation more carefully, an Ogre vs a 24 Bolo is no contest. The Bolo will take minor damage, while the Ogre gets wasted! 25 Please note that a MK IV Bolo (Continental Siege Unit) has a .5 Megaton/sec 26 firepower and can withstand anything short of a direct hit by a nuclear warhead. 27 The later model Bolo's make it even more of an uneven contest. 28 29 d:I believe that the original intention was to find out why all these weapons 30 were being brought to the inn. Unfortunately, things got out of hand.... 31 As for the apprentice passing out, I believe he was using something known 32 as a "reality pill" (see The Butterfly Kid by Chester Anderson, for details 33 about these pills.)(I believe you might enjoy the book!) 34 Briefly, they are a form of hallucinogen with the notable property that 35 your hallucinations are real! With practice, some control is possible - however 36 there is still a tendency to slip into the "wow! look at that...." state. 37 _____________________________Leonard____________________________________________ 38 Oh GOD! He went & DID it! was Kenin's first coherent thought. Looking around 39 he decide that they were safe for the moment. 40 Taking a second, more careful look he saw: 41 The piper apparently repairing some damage to his pipes. 42 The Ninja lying on his stomach (& no doubt wondering what had happened to the VW!) 43 The apprentice lying in the grass with a blissful look on his face. 44 The traveller, also taking stock of the situation. 45 The Man in Grey & FOTI arguing about whether or not any of this had REALLY happened! 46 Several strangers. 47 And .... 48 "Hello, Freddie" he said as he grabbed the Bolo dealer's arm. "Why don't we 49 have a nice LOOONG chat? Hmmmmm?" 50 As he finished, he noticed that the person with whom Freddie had been talking 51 was doing a fast fade. Too late, he realized that the familiar face had been 52 McKane. 53 Oh well, maybe next time... 54 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~BARD~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 55 Freddie: all we want is some info. Co-operate and everybody'll be happy. 56 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 57 d:The following seems an appropriate tune for your return! 58 59 The Tavern Song (by Baldwin of Erebor) 60 There was a jolly Prince, 61 In the tavern. 62 There was a jolly Prince 63 To the tavern he did go. 64 He'd pitch his woo with grace and pow'r 65 To someone different every hour. 66 There's nothing can compare with the tavern, 67 So the tavern is the place to stay. 68 69 A travelling bard came in, 70 To the tavern. 71 A travelling bard came in, 72 To the tavern he did go. 73 He ordered up a pot of stout, 74 And played his harpstrings out. 75 There's nothing can compare with the tavern, 76 So the tavern is the place to stay. 77 78 (following lines are compressed to save space, expand as above) 79 A knight came riding up 80 He jousted a butt of sack 81 So strong it laid him on his back 82 83 There was a saucy wench 84 She'd serve you once upon her feet 85 And then again between the sheets 86 87 There was a humble squire 88 He bade his master come and sit 89 Then went to make a knight of it 90 91 There was a pretty page 92 The wenches thought, "What endless joy; 93 A pity that he's still a boy." 94 95 A weaver did come in 96 He drank away a pot of ale 97 And wove us all a merry tale 98 99 A fop came mincing in 100 The wenches thought him rather odd 101 I don't think I'll complete this verse.... 102 103 There was a mighty dwarf 104 He gave us of his hard-won gold 105 For ale and a wench to hold 106 107 A 'prentice did come in 108 He ordered up one past his eight 109 And ended in a sorry state 110 111 A monger then came in 112 She ordered with a monger's call 113 And scared the patrons from the hall! 114 115 A Welshman did come in 116 He won himself tremendous fame 117 Because he could pronounce his name 118 119 It's time we started home 120 So pledge me in a bowl I pray, 121 And wish me health in every way. 122 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 123 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 124 Bard: 125 126 I'll be right with you when I get this leak fixed. (I hope there's a 127 disk in the system tomorrow morning!) 128 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 129 :*************************************************************: 130 Mohammed Wassir 131 Albanian Firebrand 132 Albanian Revolutionary Party 133 134 135 Dear Mr. Wassir: 136 137 Mr. Lawrence Henderson, of the Central Intelligence Agency, 138 has brought some irregularities in your tax statement to the 139 attention of the Internal Revenue Service. 140 141 Your attempts to write off your Latin American war debts are 142 not acceptable under US tax law. We, at the IRS, are saddened 143 to learn that Ecuadorian saboteurs destroyed your railroad 144 bridge. Unfortunately, we can not allow you to deduct this as 145 a transportation cost. 146 147 Also, war damage can not be written off as depreciation 148 allowance and income from hostages is taxable income. 149 150 Your revised tax bill now stands at $6,597,201.37. Please 151 contact Mr. d'Autun at our Portland office to arrange 152 payment. 153 Robert Winthrop 154 Internal Revenue 155 Portland Office 156 :***********************************************************: 157 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 158 Dear Monsieur d'Autun; 159 Call off the dogs! I'm just a humble Albanian Freedom Fighter trying 160 to make a living. I know you have something dangerous up your sleeve for 161 me. It seems I have no choice but to take your assignment, whatever it is. 162 Enclosed you will find several Polaroids of the BOLO's that I destroyed 163 at Fast Fred's. I used Pershing missles, I hope that isn't cheating. 164 Salazar says the Egg is worth somewhere in the neighborhood of 8 million. 165 Hmmmm.... that might just cover my tax bill. Anyway, I'll do what you 166 want. I have a sinking feeling in my gut that McKane's wrapped up in this 167 somehow. 168 My terms are write-off of the tax bill. A lifetime exclusion from 169 paying any more income taxes, and $200,000 in gold bullion. Also have 170 a Mark V BOLO at my disposal that (ahem) followed me home. 171 Mohammed Wassir 172 173 P.S. Grand Dragonmaster, nice to see you back. 174 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 175 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 176 * * * * 03/06/84 1103 (48) 177 1121 TRPD TR0260350 03/06/84 1104 (83RH) 178 ALTERNITIES INC. (SECURITY SECTION) 179 180 REPORTS FROM EYEWITNESSES AND INFORMANTS REVEAL THAT SUBJECT KNOWN AS 181 'THE BARD' AKA KENIN WAS INVOLVED IN THE BOLO BATTLE. INFORMATION 182 FURTHER REVEALS THAT HE MAY BE THE LEADER OF THE BW EXPEDITION. IF 183 CONTACTED WE WOULD LIKE TO QUESTION HIM ON HIS INVOLVEMENT IN THIS 184 AFFAIR. ACCOUNTING HAS GAUGED THE DAMAGES AT 8,631,298,41 DOLLARS. 185 DETAILED BREAKDOWN FOLLOWS. 186 REQUEST ANY DETAILED INFO YOU MAY HAVE ON THIS MATTER. IN PROCESS OF 187 ISSUING WARRANTS FOR PARTICIPANTS. 188 189 REFER: SGT. BANKS 190 TRPD TRANSREALITY PD INNISFALL TR0260350 MB 191 EOT 192 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 193 Lt. La Clair 194 INTERPOL 195 196 Dear Lieutenant; 197 I know much about Natasha's death. What it boils down to, was that 198 she was murdered by Leroy McKane. I'm still a little hazy on his reasons, 199 but McKane's an enigma anyway. While not actively seeking McKane, if he 200 crosses my path, I'll blow him away. (That dirty scum) 201 Hope you have a nice day. 202 A. Salazar 203 P.S. You wouldn't know anything about the disappearance of the Phoenix's 204 Egg? I might be able to dig up a little more on McKane to trade for some 205 information 206 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- 207 208 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 209 Leroy; 210 I'm leaving this message in our secondary drop location since our 211 primary drop (the BOLO lot ) has been comprimised. Some heavy dudes are 212 prowling around this area. The CIA, IRS, and God knows who else are putting 213 the pressure on me to do a job for them. A gentlemen named d'Autun is 214 my contact. Name sound familiar? 215 Also talked to Salazar, he said Interpol is digging for information 216 on you. Something big is going down. Salazar is still jerked about Natasha 217 He's tied up right now on the case of the Phoenix's Egg, but would like 218 to take you out if you get the chance. About the Egg, I heard from a 219 wizard friend of mine that it's magical. Something about its owner 220 being able to control the power of the ages. If you run across it, let 221 me know. We may be able to cut a deal. 222 MAQUID SALUDE 223 Mohammed 224 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 225 226 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 227 LIKE WOW,I haven't had drugs like this sence WOODSTOCK! here little paisly- 228 print monohorn creature,here girl!! I better get back to the Inn if im going 229 to stay sane. 230 231 232 Future Doctor,which phenothiazine? chlorpromazine,prolixin,mesoridazine, 233 prochlorperazine,mellarim or good old stelazine? and what doses,both cocaine 234 and downers? 235 236 The Man in Gray 237 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 238 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 239 The Wizard thoughtfully put away some of his spells for later use,the rest 240 were thrown away due to a need for avalible life-force. 241 he wondered if anyone would think of him when the little hunk of carbon they 242 call the phoenex egg was missing.strange,the egg was reacting with one of 243 his spells... 244 ::::::::::::WIZARD::::::::::::::: 245 :*************************************************************: 246 My Dearest Mohammed: 247 248 I was so saddened to learn of your difficulties with the IRS 249 and CIA. Perhaps there is something I could do to help. I'll 250 give it some thought. 251 252 Your friend 253 LeRoy 254 :*************************************************************: 255 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ 256 Overnight, I lose control of my Bolo's, have my building blown 257 out of existance, get shot at, have you all attack with stickshifts, 258 have my Bolo lot disspersed to some other reality, only to have it 259 replaced by a mad artist who can't decide what colors they want 260 the world to be, and they want to ask ME some questions ?!!?l 261 262 "I need a drink." With that I sat myself down on a tuft of pink 263 grass and waited for the expected inquiries. 264 Fast Fred 265 BSAL 266 (still out of work) 267 268 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ 269 The VW is still cruising along. Where it's going, I have know idea. 270 By the way. I'm not on my stomach. I crawled underneath and am on my back 271 hanging on with tiger claws. 272 Until the VW arrives, 273 The Ninja 274 :**********************************************************: 275 Hey Fred, don't dispair. I know it's been hard but I want to 276 help. I can still give a real good deal on some NEW Bolos. 277 Things have been hard for you, I know that, so why don't you 278 do something for yourself. Something nice...like make a bundle 279 of big bucks. Let's do business. Let's show em how it's done. 280 281 How about it Fred? What do you say? Oh sure, I know all the 282 lies they spread about me. Don't believe them. They envy my 283 success. They're petty and jealous. Pay them no mind. Let's 284 show these suckers how big business is done. 285 286 Let me know what you decide. It could be the turning point of 287 your life 288 Your buddy 289 LeRoy McKane 290 :*************************************************************: 291 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 292 I don't know why we must stay here and 293 trip out over these freaky colors! Why 294 don't we take Fast Freddie back to the Inn and dring to (our success?) 295 Then we can question him (although I have nothing to ask, I was just along for 296 the fun!). 297 298 FOTI 299 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 300 ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 301 HOW LONG HAS POOR NATASHA BEEN DEAD? 302 AS AN ANCIENT MEMEBER OF THE INN, I HAVE BEEN LURKING 303 IN THE SHADOWS... ALMOST UNSEEN AND UNHEARD FOR MANY MONTHS. 304 HOWEVER... I HAVE BEEN AWAY FOR A FEW WEEKS. 305 306 LAST I HEARD... LEROY WAS HIDDING OUT AS A PERSIAN RUG OR SOMETHING. AND 307 POOR DEAR NATAHSA WAS INSANE. BUT I HAVE HEARD NOTHING OF HER DEATH. HOW DID 308 HE KILL HER? 309 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::ANON/20 310 311 The Poet was being ignored by all, and for once that was just what he wanted 312 them to do. It was embarassing to him to be seen in this situation; until 313 now he could only testify to the sunrise from hearsay. And as if it wasn't 314 enough to be drugged, nearly kill himself bashing through miles of dark 315 forest, be shot at by arms small and large, and nearly blown up by an 316 exploding shack, now none of the colors would sit still. Wasn't that a 317 plaid tortoise flying past? The reality around here had always been unstable 318 but this was rediculous! 319 #Gaius!# 320 What? Not the voice again. Maybe if I ignore it it'll go away... 321 #O.K. Ignore all you want. However, I think you might have a bit more 322 difficulty ignoring the gentlemen now approaching from the southwest. 323 They're carrying a very LARGE bill for damages and looking for someone to 324 pay it. They also have descriptions of all of you, if not all the right 325 names...# 326 the Poet was never one to listen to voices in his head, however, better safe, 327 etc. 328 "Gentlemen and Lynn! I think we shall find it prudent to beat a retreat. 329 May I suggest a northeasterly direction?" 330 && The Mad Actor && 331 332 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& 333 LEONARD: SORRY TO DISAGREE, BUT YOU CHECK YOUR FACTS. IT IS TRUE A BOLO CAN'T 334 BE HURT BY MUCH LESS THAN A NUCLEAR WARHEAD, BUT AN ORGE MARK V HAS 6 335 NUCLEAR MISSILES AND FIRES TACTICAL NUCLEAR SHELLS. I AGREE THAT THE OGRES 336 ARMOR IS NOT VERY EFFECTIVE, BUT IT IS ENOUGH TO ALLOW AT LEAST A COUPLE OF 337 SHOTS. IF YOU CAN COME UP WITH SOME RULES, I WOULD BE INTERESTED IN SEEING 338 WHAT THE OUTCOME OF A BATTLE WOULD BE. THANKS FOR THE INFORMATION! 339 MR. MCKANE: COME, COME NOW! BE REASONABLE. DON'T DEAL WITH FRED. HE HAS AT LEAST 340 TWO FACES, PROBABLY MORE. I ALSO SUGGEST THAT YOUR BOLOS NOT APPEAR. 341 RATHER THAN DESTROYING THEM, PAULOS WILL MEARLY ASK THEM FROM WHENCE THEY CAME. 342 WITH THIS INFORMATION YOU WILL SUDDENLY BE OUT 1 BOLO FACTORY. 343 WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THE ILLUMNATI? I SUSPECT THEY ARE STILL AROUND SOMEWHERE. 344 MAN IN GREY: THEY ARE LOOKING FOR YOU! THE SCHOOL OFFICE SAID SOMETHING ABOUT 345 A RECIEPT? PLEASE CHECK IN. UNCLE EARL INSTALLED SCRAMBLER, AND I DEVELOPED 346 A PROTECTION SYSTEM FOR PASCAL. TRY TO BREAK IT!!!! 347 FAST FRED: SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU MESS AROUND WITH HIGH TEC WEAPONS. 348 TRY SELLING SOMETHING ELSE(HOW ABOUT FLOWERS AT AIRPORTS-IT SUITS YOU). 349 350 NOW THAT THE BOLOS ARE DONE, WHAT NEXT? 351 RELAXEDLY YOURS, 352 JONATHAN CHANCE 353 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& 354 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 355 The piper had the drones, chanter, and blowpipe completely removed from the 356 bag of his instrument. He had a length of yellow hemp cord tied around a 357 stick held away by his feet, wrapped several times around one of the wooden 358 tubes tied into the bag, and wrapped around a stick held in his right hand. 359 He was rolling the stock (wooden tube) and bag back and forth with all the 360 tension his strength would allow, seating the leather of the bag into a groove 361 in the base of the stock. Feeling it set in the groove, he added several more 362 turns of cord, working each down under great tension. Finally tying off the 363 cord, he drew 4 corks from his sporran. He put the blowpipe into its stock, 364 then plugged the chanter and drone stocks with the corks, then blew the bag 365 up till it was firm to the touch. 366 "There, let's see how that holds." he muttered to himself, then looked 367 around. The apprentice was still blissfully unconcous, a smile on his lips 368 and vagrant wisps of brilliant color drifting from his aura. The best thing 369 for him was a rest after that effort. The bard was sitting a ways from the 370 rest looking into space. The piper walked over to him and asked, "How did 371 that quick look get turned into a full-scale firefight?" He sat down and 372 pulled a bottle and some glasses from his sporran. 373 "Here, you look like you could use a bracer. This is Laphroige, another 374 single malt." He poured them each a drink and put the bottle away. 375 "I found that the apprentice and I could just barely keep several of us 376 together when moving through realities on the pipes. Congratulations on your 377 work together in getting the last mess cleaned up as well as you did. It was 378 well done to consult on that particular episode, although the apprentice looks 379 like he will be out of action for a while. Are you going to participate in 380 any more (hopefully non-violent) attempts to do whatever it is we were going 381 to do?" The piper sat silent for a time. "Sad to say, I can't really remember 382 just what was going on. I was headed to find the wizard (but don't remember 383 why) while you folks were looking into the connection between the used BOLOs 384 and the hairy fishnuts. What did we hope to accomplish? How? What next?" 385 He walked over to his pipes, and checked the bag. It was still firm, so 386 he removed the corks and replaced the chanter and drones in their stocks. 387 Hearing silvery laughter, he turned and saw a slight figure moving toward 388 the party. Smiling, he made a bow and began playing "The Fair Maid of 389 Glendaurel", the pipes singing sweetly in the bright spring air. 390 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 391 :*************************************************************: 392 Mohammed Wassir 393 Albanian Firebrand 394 Albanian Freedom Party 395 396 397 Dear Mr. Wassir: 398 399 There has been a terrible clerical error. On behalf of the 400 Internal Revenue Service I offer our deepest apologies. 401 402 In reviewing your tax records we have discovered that you have 403 overpaid. Not only is your overpayment sufficient to cover the 404 $6,597,201.37 we thought you owed us but is sufficient to 405 cover your tax bill for the rest of your life. 406 Once again, my deepest apologies for our error. 407 Robert Winthrop 408 Internal Revenue 409 Portland Office 410 P.S.- As a consequence of this embarrassment Mr. Henderson, of 411 the CIA, has been transfered to Raipur India where he has been 412 placed in charge of half a dozen sacred cows. 413 :*************************************************************: 414 JONATHAN CHANCE: I will not have you bad mouthing Fast 415 Freddie, the freeway fanatics friend. Fred is an upstanding 416 and totally reliable American. I would be proud to do business 417 with him. 418 ANON: There is no truth to the persistant rumors that I 419 murdered my sister Natasha with the stickshift from a brown 420 and white 57 Chevy Sedan. This is a cruel rumor perpetuated by 421 Lt. Salazar, scumbag of the world. 422 LeRoy McKane 423 :**************************************************************: 424 A mental vioce rang out to all assembled at what used to be the Bolo lot: 425 #In case you don't recall, your whole purpose ( as authorized by the King 426 of Innisfall ) was to find out who was importing the heavy weapons to this 427 reality and put an end to their activities AS QUIETLY AS POSSIBLE. Needless 428 to say, he's very disappointed in you.But he's willing to give you another 429 chance. It's been entertaining to watch your flundering efforts, but as the 430 King's appointed representative in this party I've got to say YOU'D BETTER 431 GET IT RIGHT THIS TIME. Now that d is joining us I hope we'll see a little 432 sense here. Now let's get going before the trail gets too cold. 433 #Freddy, you, I think, can help us. !**! # 434 Lynn 435 """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" 436 Dear friends, I must correct an erroneous assumption that most of 437 you have made. We are NOT in the BOLO lot. I am not certain where we are as the 438 piper was handling that end of things. A summary of events (as well as I can 439 recall them) follows. 440 IMPRIMUS: I transformed the bullets and weapons. 441 SECUNDUS: I shifted the Bolos to another reality (I *thought* I got the VW too, 442 but I will have to ask the Ninja for confirmation) 443 TERTIUS: I "grabbed" all the involved parties so that they would accompany us to 444 our destination. (Remember, piper was holding us where the lot could 445 be seen, but we were "out of phase", so the gunfire didn't affect us.) 446 QUARTUS: I *attempted to repair the damage. (It may have come to thy notice that 447 my control was slipping badly by this time) 448 QUINTUS: I lost conciousness. 449 450 I had assumed that the piper would have shifted us elsewhere, if only 451 to avoid the authorities (who are, no doubt, swarming over the scene even as we 452 speak). 453 I hope to regain conciousness soon, but in the meantime be prepared for 454 minor manifestations of whimsy. 455 456 Ninja: If I *did* move the VW, you are in a rather strange reality where the VW 457 has rights as a citizen. You are also in about the 25th (or was it 30th?) 458 century AD. 459 .......................................the apprentice........................... 460 alternities corporation 461 operations center 462 ouray colorado 81427 463 phone 303 555 0203 464 magno 836 927 cable alteco 465 466 Sgt Banks 467 TRPD 468 Innisfall 469 TR0260350 470 471 We regret that our original msg was slightly garbled. As you know we will be 472 recovering from the effects of the Fracture for at least 4 or 5 more years. 473 474 Our information on the subject (Kenin Lirison aka BARD) is somewhat sketchy. He 475 has been reported on many of our lines. He is known to have claimed NEMSEC 476 status in several cases. We are unable to confirm this due to the many records 477 lost in the accident. His abilities would seem to suggest at least level 4 478 training. 479 480 If he is one of our personnel, he may not be aware that recovery efforts are 481 being made. However he is making use of Alternities equipment if rumor can be 482 relied upon. How much and of what type is unknown. 483 484 He is not unduly aggressive, but all reports indicate that EXTREME CAUTION is 485 advisable when dealing with him on an adversary basis. 486 487 end transmission 488 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 489 :*************************************************************: 490 491 Mohammed: 492 493 Your mission is to steal the piper's pipes, help Salazar get 494 the Phoenix egg from the Wizard (we'll take care of Salazar 495 later), and convince Fast Freddie to do business with us. 496 497 Are the rumors true that you have taken PAM hostage and are 498 holding her for ransom? If so, as your employer, I get a 499 percentage of the take. 500 501 You've done good...so far. I'll be keeping an eye on you. 502 McKane 503 :***********************************************************: 504 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 505 WIZARD: I HAVE REASON TO BELIEVE THAT WASSIR IS IN LEAGUE WITH 506 INTERPOL. PROCEED ACCORDINGLY.................... 507 GEEZER 508 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 509 This VW sure looks real to me. Try and take us both back together. Fix it so 510 the VW doesn't know. That way, I can find out the information for the King. 511 When I get there, I'll radio. 512 The Ninja 513 :.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.: 514 A SUDDEN RELIGIOUS-SOUNDING TONE WAS HEARD FROM AFAR: 515 HAIRY FISHNUTS, HAIRY FISHNUTS 516 FISHNUTS FISHNUTS, HAIRY, HAIRY 517 PEACE, FLOWERS, FREEDOM, HAPPINESS!! 518 :.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.: 519 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 520 I really need to get out of this place. The colors swimming about and every- 521 thing an odd color. I THINK I'M GOING TO.... 522 < Massive pukeing sound > 523 Ooooooh! Hey, now I know what is ment by 524 tecnicholor upchuck! 525 FOTI 526 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 527 (<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>) 528 529 MAY I BE OF SOME ASSISTANCE IN SORTING OUT REALITIES? 530 I HAVE A PLANE SHIFER MODEL XI-AC1. MAYBE A LITTLE OUT OF 531 DATE, AND ONLY WORKS RELIABLY IN AREAS OF UNSTABLE REALITIES 532 LIKE AROUND THE INN. (NOTE- THIS IS THE DEVICE I EMPLOYED AT THE 533 BOLO LOT, IT ALSO HAS A BUILT IN SCANNER TO HELP IDENTIFY AREAS 534 OF INSTABILITY, BUT IT HAS OTHER USES AS WELL... ) 535 536 ALSO I FIRED ONLY THREE SHOTS WITH MY AUTOMATIC PISTOL 537 (A REALITIVELY SMALL WEAPON) ONCE IN DEFENCE AND TWICE TO 538 KNOCK OFF A HARI-KRISHNA THAT WAS FIRING AT ONE OF US. THIS I 539 CAN HARDLY CALL STIRRING THINGS UP! 540 541 WHERE SHALL WE GO FROM HERE? AND WHO IS THIS COMING 542 TOWARDS US? 543 544 (<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)(<>)THE TRAVELLER(<>)(<>)(<>) 545 PHASING IN--"WHY YES, I'LL HOIST A 546 GLASS AND LISTEN TO YOUR TALE--WAIT 547 A MINUTE!! EVERTHINGS CHANGED!! WHAT 548 THE"--PHASING OUT (HEARD IN THE BACK- 549 GROUND "DAMNED CURSE")--PHASING OUT 550 551 ORNAC 552 ##################################### 553 ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, 554 STRANGE, I COULD HAVE SWORN I SAW A GROUP OF MESON POWER WEAPONS IN EXISTANCE 555 JUST A FEW MINUTES AGO. WHERE DID THEY GO? OH, WELL, I GUESS I MUST REPORT THIS 556 TO THE OLD MAN. 557 ............... 558 GREAT! I GET STUCK WITH INVESTIGATING THIS SCREWED UP WORLD WHEN I SHOULD BE 559 ON MY R&R TIME! LET'S SEE WHAT THE COMPUTER SAYS ABOUT THIS PLACE. 560 HMM.."NAME:TERRA TECHNOLOGY LEVEL:PRIMITAVE NUCLEAR. UNEXPLORED. LAST CHECK 561 MADE ON 19934." THAT WAS ONLY 12 YEARS AGO. THEY COULDN'T HAVE DEVELOPED MESON 562 WEAPONS IN THAT SHORT OF A TIME. I GUESS I MUST INVESTIGATE. MORE TIME WASTED! 563 .......... 564 LOG ENTRY: HAVE LANDED IN AN AREA HICH SENSORS REPORT TO BE THE FOCUS OF THE 565 DISTURBANCE. APPEARS TO BE PRIMITAVE. ONLY HAND WEAPONS, NO FIREARMS! 566 THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE! ATMOSPHERE CHECKS OUT OK, SO I WILL GO OUT AND TRY TO 567 COMMUNICATE. I SHALL TAKE MY BLASTER TO INSURE MY SAFETY, AS THOSE TOADSTICKERS 568 CAN STILL BE DEADLY. 569 ........... 570 AFTER 10 MINUTES, THE TRANSLATOR HAS DECIPHERED THEIR LANGUAGE. MOST CONFUSING. 571 NOT AT ALL STRUCTURED. OH, WELL I MIGHT AS WELL TRY MY BEST AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS 572 "I AM COMMANDER LACELLS FROM THE STAR CRUISER REGULON. WHO ARE YOU?" 573 SEVERAL NAME POUR FORTH. STRANGE ONES, LIKE PIPER, TRAVELLER, BARD, ACTOR, 574 AND SEVERAL OTHERS I DIDN'T CATCH. 575 "DO ANY OF YOU KNOW ABOUT SOME HIGH ENERGY FLUCUATIONS IN THIS AREA?" 576 I CAUGHT SOMEONE SAY,"ASK THE PIPER." 577 I TURN TOWARDS THIS ENTITY, WHO IS CARRYING A BAG WITH SEVERAL STICKS IN IT. 578 HOW STRANGE. I HAVE A BAD FEELING I WILL LEARN LITTLE FROM THIS GROUP. 579 "WOULD YOU CARE TO EXPLAIN, MR. PIPER?" 580 ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, 581 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& 582 I WAS NOT SLANDERISING FRED, JUST MAKING AN OBSERVATION. IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T 583 HEARD, MR. MCKANE, OTHER PEOPLE ARE LOOKING FOR YOU. IF YOU HAVE PAM, 584 RELEASE HER NOW!!! IF YOU DO, YOU MAY GET OUT OF PRISON BEFORE YOU DIE. 585 IF YOU HAVE HER AND DON'T RELEASE HER, WE SHALL SEE HOW GOOD MY KNOWELDGE OF 586 MEDIEVAL TORTURE PROCEDURES ARE. 587 ALL: WHAT IS THE DEAL? WHY THE BIG SLOWDOWN? LET'S PICK IT UP, PEOPLE!! 588 JONATHAN CHANCE 589 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& 590 "Piper, I think this fellow looks as if he's mislaid his proper reality. 591 Sir, from whence come you?" The Poet turned an inquisitive eye to the 592 gentleman in the silve suit who'd just appeared in their midst. 593 "Well, I'm originally from the agriworld of K'n'ssas," the stranger began. 594 "Well, you're not in K'n'ssas anymore," snapped The Poet, "so stand back, 595 we've got work to do here. Piper, what did the Wizard have to say?" 596 "We never got that far. We were testing the pipes' limits, but realized 597 your trouble and went to save your lives before we got there." 598 "Damn! I guess this means we're all off to see the wizard..." 599 && The Mad Actor && 600 -------------(I suppose that nearby you will find a path of hardened clay, reflecting light of aprox 6000 angstroms?::voyeur::) 601 Dear Mad Actor: 602 You should be ashamed of yourself. "Off to see the wizard" 603 Dr. Frankenstupe 604 too close to the end to get involved on this disk. Catch you on the flip 605 flop. 606 Whisper 607 ************************************************************************* 608 PAM: ARE YOU GOING TO HIDE OUT FOREVER? THE ROWAN TREE AWAITS THY RETURN. 609 ************************* CISTOP MIKEY ********************************* 610 GA? 611 WHERE IS THE END OF THIS MADNESS? 612 IS POWER THE ANSWER TO ALL OR IS 613 POWER SIMPLY AN OPIATE FOR A MUCH 614 GREATER NEED? 615 WHY IS IT THAT ALL MUST DESIRE STRENGTH 616 IN PLACE FOR SERENITY? 617 IS IT NOT MORE DESIRABLE TO ACCEPT THE STATE OF CONDITIONS AND NOT INTIATE 618 STIFE BY CHANGING THE CONDITIONS OF SUCH STATE TO BE WHAT ONE MAY CONSIDER 619 TO BE AN IMPROVED SITUATION. ARE ALL SITUATIONS NOT THE SAME WHEN ONE ASSUMES 620 RELATIVITY? 621 I ASK THIS OF ALL WHO CONSIDER. 622 623 the digital man 624 625 626 <-----------------------------------------------------------------------------> 627 >