From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Abut A/R Date & Time: 10/01/89 23:30:55 Message Number 1 Welcome to aLTER rEALITY! This system is in the throes of startup, and is somewhat hampered by the fact that the computer it's running on is lacking certain vital organs (like a SCREEN!), so any peculiar problems you may experience are going to have to be suffered along with for a while... Anyway, this section is for general chatter of an indeterminate nature. (This, of course, should be obvious.) Oh yes... the system hours are 11PM-5PM 7 days a week. Try not to call between 5 and 11. =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: This section... Date & Time: 10/01/89 23:34:24 Message Number 2 ...is the computer/electronics technical forum. Users of all types of computers are invited to discuss technical topics here, from lowly 4-bit fanatics to mainframe hackers. =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: This section... Date & Time: 10/01/89 23:35:42 Message Number 3 ...is for controversial topics. Any sort of debate is welcome here; feel free to start new topics or reply to any that may currently exist. In fact, to get the ball rolling, here's one for you: Should this country continue its current plan to produce the outrageously expensive B-2 Stealth bomber? Does this aircraft actually have a use in life, and if so, what is it? Is it worth the money? Operators are standing by... =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: This section... Date & Time: 10/01/89 23:38:17 Message Number 4 ...is like it says. Discussions of books and movies. Is simple, no? =========== From: TURTLE To: YELLOW Subject: Here... Date & Time: 10/01/89 23:42:04 Message Number 5 ...may be found all sorts of oddness, much like, say, Lassie, only much, much different; perhaps like what Lassie would be if he were a twelve-foot-tall fire-breathing toaster oven instead of, as he is more commonly depicted, an excessively cute and lovable Collie, which he in fact is, and therefore can't really breathe fire at all, which is kind of too bad as it could present all sorts of neat plot developments to the TV show's script writers; but perhaps that's a good thing after all, since it'd look really dumb ona limited edition McDonald's lunch pail. Get the drift...? =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: This section... Date & Time: 10/01/89 23:45:27 Message Number 6 ...is for Furry fandom. Donthen is nominally the subop of this area, although he may not realize it yet; fair turnabout for getting Turtle into this furry thing in the first place. Address comments to him, preferably in (a) Latin or (b) four-letter monosyllables. =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: De section here Date & Time: 10/01/89 23:49:19 Message Number 8 ...is like de sign sez. "Coming Events." Anything upcoming should go here...BBS meetings, concerts, cons, whatever. Turtle will try to maintain a list of laser shows at the Bishop Planetarium here (never been to one? Well, why not? They're very good, fairly cheap, and well worth watching!) =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: And finally... Date & Time: 10/01/89 23:51:15 Message Number 9 Flames and Complains. Random spewing and whatnot. Gotta beef? Put it here. Nobody else will care, but it might amuse (or outrage) somebody. Editor's Note: There might be some crossover between this area and the others. If so, oh well. =========== From: SPELLWIND To: TURTLE Subject: Hours Date & Time: 10/02/89 02:39:15 Message Number 10 Thats fine, I sleep during those hours. Us psychotic nightstalkers gotta stick together... =========== From: DONTHEN To: TURTLE Subject: Here... Date & Time: 10/02/89 09:41:03 Message Number 11 I walk into the board surrounded by a bunch of fire-breathing toasters. I see a Collie. I kill him. I go home and go to sleep. Your friend, Baxioh. =========== From: YNGLING To: ALL Subject: books Date & Time: 10/03/89 01:17:48 Message Number 12 Has anyone read the new ST novel by Dillard, "The Lost Years?" I want to hear whether or not its any good before I dish out $17.95. Well? =========== From: SPELLWIND To: YNGLING Subject: books Date & Time: 10/03/89 05:05:18 Message Number 13 It's not worth half that. =========== From: DONTHEN To: SPELLWIND Subject: books Date & Time: 10/03/89 10:03:50 Message Number 14 Yes, but have you actually read it, or are you just assuming it's not worth that much?.... =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Helen Keller... Date & Time: 10/02/89 17:19:19 Message Number 15 ...BBSing is turning into a somewhat problematic excercise. For example, Donthen informs me that the menus for the Files area have somehow gone away, which is OK because the files area doesn't really exist yet. Oh well. I should be getting a new video chip for this machine sometime next week (it had to be ordered from Texas), at which time I can start straightening out some of the quirks you may have run into and actually do neat things like be available for chatting and keep an eye on what's going on. (I am trying not to leave this system on autopilot, even though I frequently have to use a friend's computer to call this one any time I want to do something with it... =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Later... Date & Time: 01/02/89 18:17:25 Message Number 16 The F]iles command now works correctly; however, due to technical difficulties the aLTER rEALITY library will be closed until further notice. Thank you. =========== From: PSYCHE To: TURTLE Subject: Laser shows Date & Time: 10/03/89 23:56:23 Message Number 17 Speaking of which, are there ever Laser Light Shows featuring The Alan Parsons Project? Forget RUSH... Speaking of Bishop Planetarium, are you an astronomy buff? There is a massive star "party"/observing session at Myakka State Park this Saturday night. Interested? My voice number is 924-8033. I'm the guy forcing that chessic dilemma down your throat. Perhaps we might play some on Saturday??? =========== From: PSYCHE To: YNGLING Subject: books Date & Time: 10/04/89 00:02:43 Message Number 18 Ever read "The Lost $17.95?" Neither have I. I just wanted to butt in. Let's play GO. =========== From: PSYCHE To: TURTLE Subject: Helen Keller... Date & Time: 10/04/89 00:05:25 Message Number 19 Sckriqu? Tahw sckriqu? =========== From: PSYCHE To: TURTLE Subject: Stealth Date & Time: 10/04/89 00:10:22 Message Number 20 It is definitely worth the money. If everyone had them, they would not be able to afford bombs! Really though - the Stealth is outrageous. Now that the good old USSR is turning over a new leaf, don't you think that we should get rid of ALL of our weapons? Yeah. And let's donate them to the Youth in Asia so that they can kill themselves if they're not satisfies with their government. Or we can be unconstitutional and burn some fags. Let's hear some serious debating. Come on - or aren't you as informed as I? =========== From: YNGLING To: SPELLWIND Subject: books Date & Time: 10/04/89 00:54:45 Message Number 22 Did you read it or are you just making an assumption based on personal opinion? =========== From: YNGLING To: PSYCHE Subject: go Date & Time: 10/04/89 00:55:58 Message Number 23 You have a one track mind. :) =========== From: YNGLING To: ALL Subject: Stealth weapons Date & Time: 10/04/89 00:58:52 Message Number 24 An interesting idea proposed in Tom Clancy's latest book "Clear and Present Danger" is the necessity for "stealth bombs" for the stealth bomber to prevent a radar return off the bomber's ordnance load. =========== From: DONTHEN To: PSYCHE Subject: Stealth Date & Time: 10/04/89 08:57:47 Message Number 25 > Or we can be unconstitutional and burn some fags. Do you know a guy who goes by "the Specialist"? Never mind. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: PURPLE POLKADOTS Subject: Do the Polka! Date & Time: 10/04/89 14:28:49 Message Number 26 I sit on my chair and am propelled to new worlds, new galaxies; I make sound, yet am silent. I shout, no one hears me through their ears, but a select few through their eyes. Chaos? Randomness? No -- it is not OUR logic, but theirs -- but logic remains. Logic remains, but truth? What is truth? Is our truth necessarily theirs? Nay, I say unto you; nay. Unicorns may trot in this world; a gryphon may be surrounded by skyscrapers. The lion may lie down with the lamb, but only one shall rise. A world of knowledge that exists not in the mind of any one person, but of a multiple. Mind-links bridge the gap between humans, humanoids, and intelligent life! No one person controlls the world, but all are gods, and all wrestle with creation. No triunity, but polyunity. No Three in a perpetual menage a trois, but a constantly expanding and contracting orgasmic creation ritual. Gods, I've got to quit trying this stuff... Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: Y'ALL Subject: What board? Date & Time: 10/04/89 14:34:54 Message Number 27 When I logged onto this board, I got an "Alter Reality" script -- but the New User information was geared to the Wyvern's Den. Which board did I call? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: Y'ALL Subject: GRATE DEBATE! Date & Time: 10/04/89 14:37:54 Message Number 28 Okay, okay... the great debate. What are you-all's opinions on the abortion question? Should the special congress Martinez set up restrict abortions, or should they expand them? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: TURTLE To: PSYCHE Subject: Lasers+Bishops Date & Time: 10/04/89 15:00:23 Message Number 29 Well, I (possibly) won't be around this weekend, so the odds of playing a game aren't terribly encouraging. "Chessic dilemma..." I like that. I'm considering any one of about 5 different things I can do, all of them bad. Sigh. =========== From: TURTLE To: YNGLING Subject: Stealth weapons Date & Time: 10/04/89 15:03:30 Message Number 30 A peculiar problem with Stealth-type weapons in general is that they can't be radar-guided--the radar signature they would emit would nullify any advantages the Stealth design presented in the first place. So that pretty much leaves out "smart" weapons (unless they're laser-guided, an idea that hasn't worked out terribly well in the past), as well as terrain following radar (unless it's /really/ low power, in which case you do what the B-1 does and "execute a controlled flight into terrain" a lot...), active EW devices, air-to-air radar... Stealth: A bad idea whose time is coming...  =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL INTERESTED Subject: Laser shows!! Date & Time: 10/04/89 15:08:40 Message Number 31 The new schedule of laser shows at the Bishop Planetarium: Oct. 6,7,8: Pink Floyd The Wall Oct. 13,14,15: Pink Floyd The Wall Oct. 20,21,22: Van Halen Nov. 3,4,5: "What's Hot" Nov. 10,11,12: The Rolling Stones All shows are 9PM, 10:30 PM, and Midnight on Fri and Sat, 6 PM only on Sunday, except "Pink Floyd The Wall" which is 9 PM, 11 PM, and 1 AM on Fri and Sat, and 6 PM on Sunday. All thickets are $4.25 at Ticketmaster outlets or at the door. I heartily recommend seeing some of these shows, especially if you've never seen one before. =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: What board? Date & Time: 10/04/89 15:12:49 Message Number 32 Hmm. It's hard to use a text editor when your computer has no screen... still, I didn't think it was THAT close. When (if?) I can ever see what I'm doing a great deal of this board will be subject to change (including the software, once I set that disassembler loose on it.) =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Memory disks... Date & Time: 10/04/89 15:19:05 Message Number 33 ...SUCK!! The New User File, which, like most of the rest of this system, is running from a memory disk, WAS in fact changed to an A/R file some time ago...HOWEVER, certain moronic reptiles didn't dump the memdisk to a floppy disk after changing it...SO, last time I turned off the machine and re-loaded the memdisk from floppy, the original file was back...AAARRRGGGHHH!!! =========== From: RUFUS To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Do the Polka! Date & Time: 10/04/89 15:48:32 Message Number 35 What would happen if Twinkies had that cream on the outside and cake on the inside? And just what is SPAM?? =========== From: PSYCHE To: YNGLING Subject: go Date & Time: 10/04/89 23:05:20 Message Number 36 Okay - let's bitch at each other's ideas over this damn board. Whad'dya wanna argue about? =========== From: PSYCHE To: DONTHEN Subject: Stealth Date & Time: 10/04/89 23:07:26 Message Number 37 Please elaborate. =========== From: PSYCHE To: RUFUS Subject: SPAM Date & Time: 10/04/89 23:14:32 Message Number 39 Sauteed Pork Anus Meat. =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: And finally... Date & Time: 10/05/89 03:57:02 Message Number 40 I will, of course, be right at home in here, being by nature, a notorious rabblerouser and chronic troublemaker. =========== From: SAURON To: ALL Subject: Misogeny Date & Time: 10/05/89 04:06:02 Message Number 41 All female brain cells in the United States of America could fit in Jane Fonda's birth canal, with enough room left over for 27 peaches and an entire North Vietnamese regiment. =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: stainless steel Date & Time: 10/05/89 04:10:09 Message Number 42 I wish to extend my good wishes to Turtle on this sparkling new venture. Another worthy addition to the BBS community. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: RUFUS Subject: Do the Polka! Date & Time: 10/05/89 12:14:59 Message Number 44 If twinkies had their cream on the outside, there'd be a lot of sticky fingers in the universe. (Except, of course, in a few lesser- known topological universes... where you'd WANT the cake on the inside.) What is SPAM? No one knows. (By the way, does anyone actually eat the stuff?) All I know is: I'm pink, therefore I'm SPAM. Question for the minute: What would chairs look like if our knees bent the other way? (Wait a minute -- equines don't need chairs... make that YOUR knees bent the other way.) Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: SAURON Subject: stainless steel Date & Time: 10/05/89 12:20:46 Message Number 45 Hear! Hear! (Or is it Here! Here!? Whatever...) Turtle -- did you celebrate the "new addition" by breaking a bottle of champagne over the computer yet? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: RUFUS To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Do the Polka! Date & Time: 10/05/89 15:24:54 Message Number 48 Well, my parents once picked up a twelve pack of deviled spam, which looks like spam accelerated to mach 7 then slammed through a screen into a blender.... And speaking of chairs..I have this tail which causes major problems, esp. at the movies... =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: stainless steel Date & Time: 10/05/89 17:29:09 Message Number 49 >Did you celebrate the "new addition" by breaking a bottle of >champagne over the computer yet? Nope; that'd be a real bad idea. The computer, as it is right now, is a bare PC board connected to a rack of disk drives and a whole bunch of wires and stuff. Until I get a replacement for the screen chip, I won't bother to put it all back together. (It's sort of a post-modern, deconstructionalist statement; it reduces the notion of "computer" to its bare elements...) The VT-52 sitting next to it is, of course, simply an artistic counterpoint. =========== From: SPELLWIND To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Drugs Date & Time: 10/06/89 14:55:49 Message Number 50 What're you on man? =========== From: SPELLWIND To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Abortion Date & Time: 10/06/89 14:56:44 Message Number 51 I'm definitely against abortion. =========== From: SPELLWIND To: TURTLE Subject: The Wall Date & Time: 10/06/89 14:58:02 Message Number 52 Nobody will notice if I go high, will they? I've always wanted to be stoned while watching the Wall, LASER! =========== From: TURTLE To: SPELLWIND Subject: Abortion Date & Time: 10/06/89 18:33:54 Message Number 53 >I'm definitely against abortion. That's because you don't have to deal with the problems associated with an unwanted pregnancy and have probably never been in a position where someone close to you has had to deal with it, either. =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: stainless steel Date & Time: 10/07/89 01:59:17 Message Number 54 To say nothing of the fact that screws up a perfectly good bottle of wine. =========== From: SPELLWIND To: TURTLE Subject: Abortion Date & Time: 10/07/89 03:24:54 Message Number 56 I'm afraid you're wrong there. I knew someone very dear to me that was faced with that decision, but thats really none of your business. =========== From: TURTLE To: SPELLWIND Subject: Abortion Date & Time: 10/06/89 17:00:04 Message Number 57 You're right, it is none of my business...except for the fact that you made the statement in the first place, and therefore really ought to back it up somehow. =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: * Date & Time: 10/06/89 17:03:08 Message Number 58 If you tend to have difficulty logging on to this system, like only receiving garbage characters, try waiting until the system sends Press before hitting anything. Once you get a carrier, there will be a pause of a couple of seconds before you get the "Press " message; sometimes if you hit return during that time you'll screw up the baud rate detection routine. I'm working on a new version of PBBS/H Front Door that may correct that problem. =========== From: SPELLWIND To: TURTLE Subject: Abortion Date & Time: 10/08/89 04:28:09 Message Number 59 Hypothetically speaking, of course, If it was half of me in there, I would want to see that part of me grow up, or at least have a chance. Theres still adoption, you know. And you can visit the child, and if you see how beautiful that baby looks, the little hands and feet, anyway , youd be glad you didn't Murder it. Hypothetically speaking of course. =========== From: TURTLE To: SPELLWIND Subject: Abortion Date & Time: 10/08/89 05:35:20 Message Number 60 Hypothetically speaking, of course, if I were not a good father, I could see it grow up in poverty and misery...or I could beat it to death...or I could simply never see it at all. There's still adoption, of course, if it's a healthy, WHITE baby; if it's born un- healthy, or if it's black, it's considered "unadoptable." Then, of course, the child can look forward to an endless series of foster homes, in which if it doesn't get abused it's doing pretty well. And anyway, when it grows up, if it grows up, it can be excused for not being ecstatic over its lot in life. Hypothetically speaking, of course. =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: This board... Date & Time: 10/08/89 05:39:21 Message Number 61 ...is having problems. Partly that's my fault, since I'm working on a new version of PBBS/H Front Door that's SUPPOSED to make logging on easier but seems not to like letting people on at all; partly it's the result of running a system blind (but that should be fixed Any Day Now!!) Anyway, if you run into any peculiar problems logging on, or the system doesn't seem to be responding right, leave me a message here or in E-mail explaining what happened and I'll try to see that it doesn't happen again. =========== From: TOXIC WASTE To: ALTERED FORMS Subject: sex with a medi Date & Time: 10/08/89 13:43:18 Message Number 62 ouch! sex with a melting dick, now that hurts more than virgin sex.OUCH =========== From: DONTHEN To: PSYCHE Subject: Stealth Date & Time: 10/08/89 14:18:47 Message Number 63 You said, "burn some fags", not "burn some flags". If that was intentional, you have something in common with The Specialist, a rather homophobic chap who is, in most other respects, a pretty interesting person. He's also, incidentally, the first guy to actually come up with a character on my story board. =========== From: TURTLE To: TOXIC WASTE Subject: sex with a medi Date & Time: 10/08/89 16:56:13 Message Number 64 Gee, Toxic, that's profound. Although you can never be TOO sure; one person's cruel and unusual punishment is another's great weekend. We're not sexually frustrated, are we, Tiger? =========== From: TURTLE To: RUFUS Subject: Hello... Date & Time: 10/08/89 16:59:22 Message Number 65 I know you're out there...cat got your tongue?? (Actually, I prrobably shouldn't say things like that; after all, if YOU were a cat, would YOU want some human's slimy disgusting tongue? And when a cat has a tongue, what does it DO with it? Does it listen to it? Or spend it? Or collect it and trade with friends? Sell it on street corners? Put it in a HabiTrail, call it George, and teach it to run around in circles and pontificate on the nature of reality, time, and space, as it performs amazing feats of four-dimensional geometric transformations, to the awe of several major mathmatics departments at colleges and universities all across the country (who are really QUITE thrilled to be there, mathematicians being...well, you know, and that other thing, too, and being basically boring people who live in houses with pointed roofs and getting excited over finite state machines and real analysis in FORTRAN, which as everyone knows is not a language at all but rather a large and nicely-poached egg on one of those little silver things that people put poached eggs on, cleverly MASQUERADING as a programming language) and in the far corners of the globe, even in those places where people are...well, you know, and that other thing too, and do strange rituals with toothpicks and last week's newspapers...) And your handle backward still spells SUFUR, too, so there. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: RUFUS Subject: Do the Polka! Date & Time: 10/09/89 13:36:10 Message Number 66 Chairs? At least your race managed to evolve to be able to use chairs... (BOY! Are my hooves tired at the end of a day...) =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: SPELLWIND Subject: Drugs Date & Time: 10/09/89 13:38:31 Message Number 67 Right now, I'm on ALTER REALITY. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: This board... Date & Time: 10/09/89 13:40:50 Message Number 68 In a word, if you can't log on to the system, leave a note on the system. Right? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: Hello... Date & Time: 10/09/89 16:27:49 Message Number 69 Gee, that actually makes sense....and your name backwards spells eltrut. And we all know that an ELTRUT is a large blood sucking e1X Y {doi]g{.}i}i|` ( damn line noise _) blood sucking gerbil that keeps moos|`e9{ tQ.(o[ =========== From: RUFUS To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Do the Polka! Date & Time: 10/09/89 16:29:35 Message Number 70 Hey, you guys could have chairs, just not the same type, kinda like a skinny bed. Then again..you are a farm animal ( boy, will I catch hell for this ).. =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: This board... Date & Time: 10/09/89 18:32:14 Message Number 71 Well, that's a sentence,, not a word, but yeah, that's the basic idea. If you han't log on, leave a note here...hmm, I like that. =========== From: SPELLWIND To: CHIPPER Subject: chair for chip Date & Time: 10/10/89 10:32:53 Message Number 72 I invented one! you lay on your tummy and theres a shelf like thing under it you rest your front legs on, while a lower part is for your back legs. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: RUFUS Subject: Sense? Date & Time: 10/10/89 12:42:42 Message Number 73 Maybe this message will save... Give me a call when you get back, as I would like to get the 4P up and running w. 2 720k drives, & 128k soon. (see msg in E-Mail) \/- =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: RUFUS Subject: Farm animal? Date & Time: 10/10/89 12:43:39 Message Number 74 Farm animal? Pardon me... In your evolution, the primates evolved intelligence (and are currently beginning space travel -- though it seems less and less likely each year that you'll discover... never mind.) In our case, one of the larger herbivores evolved intelligence, and the wogs -- I mean primates -- are used as farm animals. No offense, I hope. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: SPELLWIND Subject: chair for chip Date & Time: 10/10/89 12:47:13 Message Number 75 Sounds terribly uncomfortable. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: RHINOCEROUSES Subject: Lore of the Un. Date & Time: 10/10/89 12:49:53 Message Number 76 No statistics can ever be completely verified. During the middle ages, unicorns were believed to prance all over the globe -- except, of course, the part you happened to live in. Fortunately, many unicorns were caught, and their horns were proudly displayed among the riches of many kings... indeed, a unicorn's horn once fetched five times its weight in gold. Unicorn parts were used as the supreme tonic, but especially as a talisman against poison. However, as the middle ages wore on, and more people began learning more about the world, the lower the population of the unicorns. Oddly enough, the cost for alicorn (the unicorn's horn) dropped tremendously, in direct violation of the supply/demand principle. As the middle ages dropped to a close, no one wanted anything to do with the very-existant horns of the non-existant beasts. That's logic for you. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: TOXIC WASTE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Sex=chips chair Date & Time: 10/10/89 13:36:30 Message Number 77 That chair sounds like fun! hmm. =========== From: PSYCHE To: DONTHEN Subject: Stealth Date & Time: 10/10/89 23:00:20 Message Number 78 My extreme love of puns got the best of me once again. The quip was, indeed, intentional; it was meant only as a joke. Apologies to anyone who might have been offended by it. =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Farm animal? Date & Time: 10/11/89 04:11:54 Message Number 79 While in a more rational universe, REPTILES evolved sentience, and the more primitive lifeforms which elsewhere managed to achieve a reasonable facsimilie of intelligence, although never to any notable extent, are kept in their places... =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: chair for chip Date & Time: 10/11/89 04:13:21 Message Number 80 Pininfarina made a concept car with a "seat" like that. It's a convertible with two rounded "benches" from back to front; the driver and passenger straddle it as though they were riding a motorcycle, and lean on handlebars positioned in front of the things. The foot pedals which operate the vehicle are located on either side of the driver's saddle, slightly /behind/ the point at which he sits... You can see a picture of it in a book on exotic cars that they have at Waldenbooks; can't remember what it's called, though. =========== From: TURTLE To: TOXIC WASTE Subject: Sex=chips chair Date & Time: 10/11/89 04:16:44 Message Number 81 Hmm indeed. Aren't you a little young to be thinking about such things? And in any event it couldn't be as much fun as a gymnastics horse... (You know, that big brown thing you're supposed to flip over...) Or so I've heard. =========== From: DONTHEN To: TURTLE Subject: Sex=chips chair Date & Time: 10/11/89 04:21:34 Message Number 82 Yes, but what about a tiger swirl? =========== From: SPELLWIND To: TURTLE Subject: Farm animal? Date & Time: 10/11/89 10:11:23 Message Number 84 The places reptiles are kept are Zoos and giant fishtanks, HA! I'm glad archdemons are humanoid.. =========== From: TURTLE To: SPELLWIND Subject: Farm animal? Date & Time: 10/11/89 17:46:25 Message Number 85 Reptiles are confined to zoos and the like by less sophisticated beings simply because it is immediately obvious to all other forms of life that the reptiles are the naturally superior life-forms, and they are caged out of jealousy and fear that the reptiles will one day rise to take their rightful place in the scheme of things... =========== From: DONTHEN To: TURTLE Subject: Farm animal? Date & Time: 10/11/89 19:21:24 Message Number 86 Humans confine reptiles (and other animals) to cages because they can and the animals can't do the reverse. =========== From: SPELLWIND To: TURTLE Subject: New product Date & Time: 10/11/89 22:12:48 Message Number 87 Epilepsy 2, to shave the remainder of your hair off after chemotherapy ... HAHAHAHAHAHAHA =========== From: CRYSTAL To: SAURON Subject: Misogeny Date & Time: 10/11/89 23:28:58 Message Number 88 Well sauron I feel compeled to rebuttle that statement. For I am a woman and I do not like Jane Fonda. But with a statement like that I can only say the women you know do have a big problem but that's OK they probaly do not know about it. And perhaps you should try and challange yourself a little more, other wise your brain cell could join our brain cells. =========== From: CRYSTAL To: TURTLE Subject: Abortion Date & Time: 10/11/89 23:46:55 Message Number 89 Abortion has got to be looked at from all sides. It does not only involve the woman, It also involves the man and naturally the child. I can honestly say that being faced with that as an option is not any more soothing then not having it at all. If the child is healthy and has the luck in being adopted that is the decision I would make. However If the child is not healthy, Or the Mother is not healthy, the child will say be abused, (in any form) then yes the child should be aborted. I still promote the use of contraceptives!!!! =========== From: RUFUS To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Farm animal? Date & Time: 10/12/89 15:57:23 Message Number 91 No offense, I was just pulling your leg ( gee, which leg, I dunno ). Of course if I didn ( oh poopies ) didn't believe in evolution then I would be offended, but seeing how I do, I'm not! One question, do you guys have monkey races? (snicker) =========== From: RUFUS To: DONTHEN Subject: Farm animal? Date & Time: 10/12/89 16:01:35 Message Number 92 And then there's me, who has mixed feelings, seeing how I do have a reptile ( really now, just what do you classify a dragon as? ) tale. But then again...who cares.... =========== From: RUFUS To: DONTHEN Subject: Farm animal? Date & Time: 10/12/89 16:02:29 Message Number 93 You want to hear my reptile tale now ( sheesh..one timed writing and my brain is on strike )?? that should be reptile tail. =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Some users... Date & Time: 10/12/89 20:19:27 Message Number 95 ...have talked to me about the possibility of establishing a story- board on aLTER rEALITY. I am sort of dubious on the idea, since there are a lot of 'em out there and this board doesn't have a very extensive userlog as of yet, but who knows... Anyway, if you've got an opinion on the subject, I'd like to hear it. What do you think? Any bright ideas?? =========== From: SPELLWIND To: TURTLE Subject: Storyboard Date & Time: 10/12/89 21:26:44 Message Number 96 Anything but a pub or tavern, how about a house of ill repute or a casino? =========== From: LT. COMMANDER DEREK To: TURTLE Subject: Here... Date & Time: 10/12/89 22:32:17 Message Number 97 Except, you know, Lassie is a she, so it goes. Or was it the other way around...Hmmm. Wasn't it like that Spuds McKenzie scandal or something? =========== From: LT. COMMANDER DEREK To: YNGLING Subject: books Date & Time: 10/12/89 22:34:40 Message Number 98 I would also like to know if it's good, but alas, the only person I know who actually could read it is a friend who's cousin buys Star Trek books just 'cause they're there. Guess he took Kirk's advice to heart. Anyway, I'm not dishing out the 18 bucks either. I'll wait for the $4 paperback in two years. =========== From: LT. COMMANDER DEREK To: PSYCHE Subject: Laser shows Date & Time: 10/12/89 22:38:07 Message Number 99 I keep waiting patiently for laser shows with THE BEATLES! =========== From: LT. COMMANDER DEREK To: PSYCHE Subject: Stealth Date & Time: 10/12/89 22:39:27 Message Number 100 Did you mean to leave out a letter and suggest burning "fags" or did you mean "fLags"??/ =========== From: LT. COMMANDER DEREK To: SPELLWIND Subject: Abortion Date & Time: 10/12/89 22:47:12 Message Number 101 Well you brought up the fact that you were against abortion. What would you do if your wife/girlfriend whatever was raped and she was going to have the child of a criminal and if she DID it would hurt her health for the rest of her life or she could die. Which life you want your wife's or the rapists baby? =========== From: LT. COMMANDER DEREK To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Farm animal? Date & Time: 10/12/89 22:53:20 Message Number 102 You know, if we keep on going further into space, we're either going to find nothing, or a big black slab with a ratio of 1:4:9! OR we could find a big race of kick-ass robots called The Borg who will demand a spin-off series. =========== From: LT. COMMANDER DEREK To: TURTLE Subject: Some users... Date & Time: 10/12/89 22:58:02 Message Number 103 If you start a story that we all could screw up like on Remote Control then a storyboard would be really neat! I love what's come up on RC! hillarious stuff! =========== From: SPELLWIND To: LT. COMMANDER DEREK Subject: Abortion Date & Time: 10/13/89 00:25:25 Message Number 104 I meant, Skywalker/Lt. Commander, there should be restrictions, and that falls into the restriction area. =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Storyboard... Date & Time: 10/13/89 02:08:13 Message Number 105 If I DO put up a storyboard here, I'd like it to be as totally unlike every other storyboard in the area. Unfortunately, most of my ideas so far have been pretty X-rated, which means I'd have to go through the hassle of restricting access to it and inquiring about users' ages and miscellaneous bullshit, to cover my ass legally. It really isn't worth the effort, and I DON'T feel like policing a board to be sure it was always within the nice limits that we all need to maintain our moral standards... <--Note sarcasm here. ANYWAY, if anyone's got some unusual settings for such a thing, let me know; the worst I'll do is ignore you... =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: Some users... Date & Time: 10/13/89 11:52:07 Message Number 106 Actually, it might be a good idea to wait till the one on the Wyvern's Den comes to an end ( IF it comes to an =========== From: RUFUS To: LT. COMMANDER DEREK Subject: Here... Date & Time: 10/13/89 11:53:11 Message Number 107 The male characters being played by females was covered in Bloom County sometime back. =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: A grave issue Date & Time: 10/13/89 17:07:09 Message Number 109 It has come to my attention that pimentos are becoming an increasingly popular food substance in this country. As everyone knows, pimentos are actually the toes of the increasingly endangered Pimen bird of southeast Asia. This bird, noted in the wild for its spectacular plumage and its eerie mating call, is being ruthlessly hunted for its delicious red toes, which are cut off, put in little glass bottles, and stuffed inside green olives for consumption in the States. As this ruthless activity increases in scope, the Pimen bird is being hounded into oblivion by the greed of man. I say, ACT NOW! Boycott all products made from Pimen birds! Don't eat pimentos! Remember, extinct is forever. =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: A grave issue Date & Time: 10/13/89 23:05:55 Message Number 110 Me, I've been doing my part for some time now. I've been eating black olives, which are actually helping the ozone layer. =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: Abortion Date & Time: 10/14/89 01:42:23 Message Number 111 I doubt that you would apply any of those arguments in avocating the disposal of 3 yr. old children, so why apply it merely beuse the child is younger =========== From: SAURON To: CRYSTAL Subject: Misogeny Date & Time: 10/14/89 01:50:44 Message Number 112 Thank you for your clear concise reply to my dead-serious social comment. Rarely have I seen a moere logic rejoinder. , _ By the way, that's what a comma looks like. =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: Some users... Date & Time: 10/14/89 01:54:36 Message Number 113 Ooooo, ooooo. Yes....yes. Let's do an electronic adaptation of my all-time favorite "Truck Stop Lust". =========== From: SAURON To: LT. COMMANDER DEREK Subject: Abortion Date & Time: 10/14/89 01:57:27 Message Number 114 And what would you do if you were getting ready to be hit by meteorite and the only way you could save yourself was by not getting your uncle/co-worker's rented Oldsmobile back in time, and that would ruin your credit rating at HFC and.... That's about equally relevant. =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: A grave issue Date & Time: 10/14/89 02:02:44 Message Number 115 Pimentoes, Naugahides, and baby seals. Three tragedies. =========== From: SAURON To: SAURON Subject: Misogeny Date & Time: 10/14/89 02:03:59 Message Number 116 I see line noise can make a travesty out of punctuation and spelling. If that was the case...sigh. (not to be confused with grin) =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: Y'ALL Subject: Grrrrrr.... Date & Time: 10/14/89 11:47:53 Message Number 117 After mid-term examinations, I log onto Alter Reality, and what do I get? BLAME for breaking the user log... Hmmmmph! It wasn't REALLY all my fault, y'know... Blame the bottle of Vin du Basura we broke over the 'pooter to celebrate the opening of a new BBS... Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: chair for chip Date & Time: 10/14/89 11:52:47 Message Number 118 Sounds interesting... I can see myself driving one of those through the cobblestone streets of Ranea (by the way, does it have good suspension? Just asking...) and being stopped by a "technology cop..." Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: SPELLWIND Subject: Farm animal? Date & Time: 10/14/89 11:54:41 Message Number 119 Funny. That's what we do with humans on Monocerous. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: RUFUS Subject: Monkeys Date & Time: 10/14/89 12:07:11 Message Number 120 Dear Rufus, Actually, we have one or two races that are somewhat similar to your "monkeys." However, they have even less intelligence than yours; and -- I'm afraid -- are near extinction. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: STORY! Date & Time: 10/14/89 12:09:19 Message Number 121 YesYesYesYesYesYesYesYesYesYesYesYesYesYes!!!!!!!!!! Sure, there are a lot of storyboards out there. Are there any good ones except what's at the Wyvern's Den? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: SPELLWIND Subject: Storyboard Date & Time: 10/14/89 12:10:53 Message Number 122 Dear Spellwind, If you must insist on one of those two ideas, a casino would probably be better. I refuse to play human characters on storyboards (whenever this is possible...) and even the most luscious woman of a house of ill repute doesn't tempt a non-anthropomorphic. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: LT. COMMANDER DEREK Subject: Farm animal? Date & Time: 10/14/89 12:15:58 Message Number 123 Dear Lt. Commander Derek: Several questions: In which of the armed forces did you receive your rank? (Must remember not to rely on that one...) Why do you assume that the ideas of certain science fiction series must be true? Trust me: what really occurs in space is far beyond the dreams of any of your writers. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: DONTHEN To: RUFUS Subject: The Pub Date & Time: 10/14/89 13:55:39 Message Number 124 The storyboard on the Den probably won't 'come to an end'... something else will happen. That's one of the points of having a free-form storyboard rather than a conventional "Once upon a time lived Fred and Agatha" story, where everybody adds another chapter to the saga of Fred and Aggie until about 5 chapters down the line when somebody gets bored and completely changes the setting, and the plot immediately goes into dribble and slops all over the disk drive until somebody says "Then they all die, let's start over." Since characters are free to come and go in the Den (after all, it _is_ a Pub, and it's still open for business, although any newcomers might not get served immediately!), any new user could come in and start making trouble. It is possible Spellwind might come up with a coherent plotline, as hard to believe as that is. Assuming, of course, he doesn't try to screw up the current plotline and get his access level bounced. =========== From: CRYSTAL To: SAURON Subject: Misogeny Date & Time: 10/14/89 15:18:47 Message Number 125 OH thank you for showing me that ( , ) is a comma. Now what does it do????? =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: DONTHEN Subject: The Pub Date & Time: 10/14/89 23:58:46 Message Number 126 Having your style of storyboard simply makes more sense than the "chapter" type of storyboard -- if one wishes to add another plotline, it's fairly easy to do (either by adding a twist to a character's background, or by adding another character...) but most importantly, there are lines to what can and can't be done with the storyboard. Other people might not like your idea to ...say, journey into the Abyss, and might prefer to... say, cuddle with a nearby barbarian mouse. You can't (or, at least shouldn't) force others to do your bidding -- this is quite a bit more like real life... (except, of course, having a certain unicorn spontaneously attack a certain Angel -- which WILL have serious consequences to Chip...) Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Hi there... Date & Time: 10/15/89 14:13:44 Message Number 127 ...have you been plagued by the evil Gods of Line Noise in your past incarnations on aLTER rEALITY? Well, Turtle, through much diligent research, consultation with Powers Beyond, and dabbling into the Dark Arts unknown to man or reptile, has, in his infinite wisdom, discovered the source of the problem. It seems that our gung-ho always-on-the-move society has created a demand for a certain gizmo- wonder called a "cordless telephone," which device doth exist in this household. It also seems that cordless telephones and modems don't really get along. The phone has a bad habit of making an arcing noise, like when the transporters screw up on Star Trek, which doth generate messages from Beyond, usually in the middle of an attempted login. The phone has been excorcised (I shan't go into the messy details) though, so peace and tranquility should once more reign here... =========== From: ROCKY To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Dreams Date & Time: 10/15/89 17:46:10 Message Number 128 Well, if we were not to dream of what is eventually in store for our kind, I think that mankind would surely become extinct... Considering that we are already too late to save this poor feeble little planet we are on now, it would seem necessary to dream up ideas that may be the only hope mankind has left. We have already had to put off the shuttle project too long, and if it weren't for war and political greed, this country (or should I say world, as a world-wide political union is what it would take now to stop this madnes) would be far beyond our own solar system by now, and well on it's way to solutions to this pungent fallout of governments gone bad. Dreams. Dreams are all that is left. Without them now, we would have nothing to look forward to, as we would have already destroyed ourselves... =========== From: ROCKY To: MY 'PUTER... Subject: DUST Date & Time: 10/15/89 17:55:14 Message Number 129 WHINE!!! I hate when all that dust collects on the monitor screen! Now that it's gotten to 2 inches thick, I had to take a spatula and scrape it off! WHINE!!! =========== From: ANGEL To: SAURON Subject: Misogeny Date & Time: 10/15/89 18:06:16 Message Number 130 S-> All female brain cells in the United States of America could fit in S-> Jane Fonda's birth canal ... I think we have here a prime example of why so few women ever call Sauron's bulletin board, or why women like me who do call ... only make that mistake once. Why is there a direct relationship between a male's lack of respect for female intelligence and the vehemence of his stand against abortion? =========== From: ANGEL To: TURTLE Subject: I'm entering! Date & Time: 10/15/89 18:13:21 Message Number 131 Hallelujah! I can enter messages at last! Guess axing your cord- less phone did the trick. =========== From: ANGEL To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Horsey-panky? Date & Time: 10/15/89 18:16:05 Message Number 132 Why would setting a storyboard in a house of ill-repute force you to play a human character? Don't they have such houses on Monocerous? Don't unicorns fool around (gosh, where do little unicorns come from)? Considering Chip's good eye for the fillies, I didn't assume Monocerosians were a strictly monogamous race. (Or is that Monocerosites, Monoceroslings, Monosodiumglutamates, or Monosexuals?) =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: Hi there... Date & Time: 10/15/89 18:31:11 Message Number 133 The phone has been excorcised? Exercised? Ya mean ya took the phone out jogging?!? Sheeeeesh! And I thought I had a strange relationship with machines... Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: ROCKY Subject: DUST Date & Time: 10/15/89 18:32:55 Message Number 134 Two inches thick? No wonder you were having troubles reading messages on BBS's... I always scrape the dust off when it's one inch thick. Whether it needs to or not. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: ANGEL Subject: Horsey-panky? Date & Time: 10/15/89 18:34:13 Message Number 135 Dear Miz Angel, As time has shown again and again, mixed-species houses of ill repute do not work. When humans are forced to come within five hundred yards of three Quagno'll in the middle of -- uh, business -- the resulting odor will immediately dispell any amorous thoughts. Most Copulatoriums are species-specific! Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: DONTHEN To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Horsey-panky? Date & Time: 10/16/89 01:46:36 Message Number 136 > Most Copulatoriums are species-specific! Cute word, but its accuracy depends strictly on which setting you happen to put it in. If the variance in species is as wide as the Cantina in STAR WARS, point granted. If, however, things more closely resemble the alternate earth that the Tyel Hyatt Regency and "Fur Le Dance" nightclub (from the storyboards on Kyim's Scratching Post and the Tiger's Den, respectively), then you're a little off-base. If you don't want to go to California for examples, there's Sheba the Cheetah coming on to every male in the "Ace of Spades", Murr & Turtle's quickly warming relationship in the "Double Edge Tavern" and Juka & Xonzoff on the Pub, who have certainly done more than cuddle cutely in the corner, even if they haven't done it "on camera" like the Calif. furry boards occasionally do. None of those are set in a bordello, but given an atmosphere where cross-species matches aren't thought of any more oddly than an elven/human couple in your average Generic High Fantasy, it wouldn't be anything out of the ordinary (at least, not necessarily). The barrier for Chip would be the fact that he is a quadraped in a world of bipeds. There are "furry" centaurs running around, though, both in Ranea and through 'Furversion', so a cross-species match wouldn't necessarily be impossible for him, either, depending on his own whims about such things. Of course, it's YOUR fault he's not a biped. Empress Alicia from "Xanadu" is a unicorn, too, and she's a humanoid (and one who'd have absolutely no difficulty attracting lovers of any species or sex, as long as they're living). =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Phone exsex Date & Time: 10/16/89 02:03:21 Message Number 138 No, no, no. The phone has been EXORCISED, not excercised. You know, like in the movie. Black candles in a pentacle, chanted spells, invocations of the Greater Gods, Hostess Twinkies with cream filling, school busses, ... You get the general idea. I commanded the evil phone spirits to Begone! and pulled the plug out of the wall while chanting "Hail Richard Nixon! Hail Richard Nixon!" and shore 'nuff, it worked. 'Course now the cordless phone DOESN'T (must've been the final ritual...throwing it from the top of College Hall into the bay to frighten away the demons, that did it in), but oh well. ---Turtle the Spellbreaker =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: Hi there... Date & Time: 10/16/89 15:31:28 Message Number 139 Thank you of wondorous reptile. Say, we have 2 lines in our house. One is the voice line, and the other is mine ( modem line ). Would a cordless phone on the voice line affect the modem line ( or is this exactly the set-up you have ). =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Help! Date & Time: 11/11/89 00:31:42 Message Number 140 This board has been non-functional for several days due to a minor disaster with its message file. All the messages above #139 are gone. Poof. Irretrievably. Vanished. Sorry. Apologies if you tried to call and couldn't get through. I'm tired. I'm going to bed now. More later. Goodnight. =========== From: DONTHEN To: TURTLE Subject: Help! Date & Time: 10/24/89 13:15:42 Message Number 141 In the PBBS/WEL file, you must mean message #140, not #130. =========== From: I LOVE GOLF To: TURTLE Subject: sympathy Date & Time: 10/25/89 16:00:51 Message Number 142 poor Turtle. He works so hard yet none of us say thank you. I would like to say thank you from Dion Renno. People you dont realize how hard it is to be a SYSOP, staying up all hours of the night donig things for ungrat eful, people just because they like doing good deeds. So send him a dona tion or a letter of thanks. P.S. disregard this messageHA!HA!HA!HA! =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: DONTHEN Subject: Horsey-panky? Date & Time: 10/25/89 22:06:54 Message Number 143 Donthen- Chip might prove attracted to some of those centaurs you were mentioning... I dunno. He actually is from an entirely different race, and I've never worked out the mating ritual for unicorns (whether they're completely monogamous, polygamous, or... whatever) but I'm not certain he'd feel attracted to female centaurs... Who knows? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: Help! Date & Time: 10/25/89 22:11:15 Message Number 144 Gosh! A message from the future! November eleventh of this year! Oh, calloh, callay! (gollum, gollum...) Let's see... factual information from the message: the board will be down from about the ninth through early morning on the eleventh. All messages (including this one... EEP!) will disappear... And... the final bit of information: TURTLE SLEEPS! Oh, great master of wisdom, I thank thee, for thou hast given us this great information (not to mention faked Middle English)... Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: WASSAILERS Subject: Witches' brew Date & Time: 10/25/89 22:15:48 Message Number 145 As the dark holiday descends on the unsuspecting crowd, and as the Great Pumpkin rises from his patch as Linus watches, one unicorn, standing on a uncreated planet, imagines what it would be like to gaze from the depths of a black hole into the starlight created by the Big Bang. Ghosts and goblins meander through ether and ArcNet nodes fail. Not a virus among either, merely the quinessent force permeating reality, surreality, and irreality. The harvest season of an insignificant planet draws near; and an obscure religious figure smiles as he is hauled off in anclecuffs while posing for the photograph for Newsweek magazine, which will eventually find itself on page thirty- five, as the Hairy Tribble ignores the leaving of another Soviet state from the Disunited Soviet Socialist Republics... Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Help! Date & Time: 10/26/89 16:06:06 Message Number 146 All right, all right, give me a break. The entire board goes down in a dramatic fashion, I stay up until 7 AM fixing it, several messages disappear through a wormhole in space, and you want to agitate me because the DATE wasn't right? Sheesh! Honestly, you're awfully picky for someone from the Twilight Zone! Thpth! =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Storyboard! Date & Time: 10/26/89 16:08:24 Message Number 147 It is starting to look like the storyboard currently on Outland, "Black Devil Saloon," will eventually move over here to aLTER rEALITY, in a somewhat larger format (new! improved!). The basic premiss is this: the board is a "furry" storyboard set in a Wild West town similar to any of a zillion or so seen on any bad western you might find late at night on some obscure cable TV channel. The story will probably be divided into three discrete settings: a tavern (of course), a casino, and a hotel, each of which will have its own conference on this system. Although activity will focus on these areas, it is not restricted to them (for an idea of what I mean, simply consider the Wyvern's Den Pub on that other PBBS system...) Users will be given free access to the tavern area, but will have to request access to the casino and hotel. In theory, three separate but related storylines could take place in the same town with this arrangement, and one player may have characters in all three. We'll see how it works. The tavern area will most likely be a "conventional" wild west furry story, if that isn't an oxymoron; the casino may be a PG-13 area, and the hotel an R area. We'll see how that goes, too. Anyway: That's the general idea. Comments? =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Modest proposal Date & Time: 10/26/89 16:15:27 Message Number 148 Hmm. It seems that Congress still has the general idea that Ronald Reagan's Strategic Defense Initiative ("Star Wars" to you and I) is basically a good idea, even if they are willying about trying to decide how to pay for it. As you probably know, the idea calls for building a system that will use lasers, particle beams, and other bits of wizardry to zap enemy missiles before they arrive. That may or may not be a technological possibility, but in any event it is certain to be very expensive. Also, if technology develops on both sides of the Great Divide, as has always been the case before, it can be stated that any system we get working today, the Russians will be able to get around tomorrow, unless we upgrade, which of course will make them upgrade their upgrade, etc... So given that the system is likely to be prohibitively expensive and at best only temporarily effective, I say: BUILD IT. Why? Read the next message. =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Continuing... Date & Time: 10/26/89 16:20:30 Message Number 149 OK, so why do something that's (a) expensive and (b) not likely to work very well? Simple. Defense budgets on both sides of the fence are limited, and getting more limited all the time. So, here's what's likely to happen: Flunky: "I've got some bad news, sir. The Reds have just announced development of a new hyper-shielded supersonic-boost missile that can survive our Omni-Zap Destructo Ray. They'll start building them Tuesday." General: "Didn't we just pay $120,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 for the Omni-Zap?" Flunky: "Yes, sir. The research people say they can fix it so that it'll take out a Russkie hyper-shielded missile for only $6,000,000,000, though." General: "Great. And our new omni-invisible super-missiles can get through the new Commie hyper-blast particle gun, too. We're doing well." Flunky: "Not really; the Reds have just announced an improved hyper- blast that'll nail our missiles. We can fix the missiles, though, for only $45,000,000,000." ...And so on. Sooner or later even the most pinheaded Pentagon peon will notice that everyone's spending gobs of money on missiles and systems that probably won&t ever work. Since moral, logical, and ethical arguments have so far failed miserably to get the superpowers to sit down and admit that ICBM's are a pretty bad thing, perhaps economic considerations will do the trick. If it can be demonstrated convincingly that they are far too expensive and far too unreliable to be effective weapons, we'll finally legislate the bastards out of existance... ...but probably not. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: Twilight Zone? Date & Time: 10/26/89 21:42:26 Message Number 150 Dear Turtle, You're implying that I'm from the Twilight Zone? I'll tell you, half-human, that I was born in the city of , the capital city of the cantor of , on the planet you humans call Monocerous. I went to school 'till I was fourty revolutions old, like most of my kin, got a job in the equivalent of Civil Service, and have been working (and progressing) steadily ever since. How'd you know Monocerous was part of the Twilight Zone, anyway? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: Storyboard! Date & Time: 10/26/89 21:47:19 Message Number 151 Comments? Sounds interesting... Should we have three (at least) different characters for each of the three settings, or should we have just one (who can meander through all three?) Also, can we choose non-standard furry characters (perhaps.. a crocodile?) (I wouldn't dream of usuing a human, of course...) I'm interested in all three worlds, of course. But I don't think Chip would be visiting the brothel... uh, hotel. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: Continuing... Date & Time: 10/26/89 21:52:08 Message Number 152 Turtle... I'm shocked at you. From your... your stinginess, you are risking the entire FREE WORLD to the evil Communist nations. Do you realize what would happen if we were to let up one inch... even one millimeter from our strong positions? THE COMMUNISTS WOULD TAKE OVER AMERICA! Haven't you seen the classic, beautifully-made-for-TV movie "Amerika" starring Kris Kristofferson a few years back? How nobody in the U.S. had the guts to stand up to the Commies... so they took over. They had REAL MEN on their sides, and who do we have on ours? George Bush and Dan Quayle... From your, your bleeding-heart liberalism; from your COWARDICE -- it's people like you that are keeping the U.S. from staying number one in the world! It's all YOUR fault that the U.S. hasn't yet nuked the evil Commie Empire, to get rid of their scum from the earth! If it weren't for YOU, every other country would be bowing down to our obvious superiority! The REAL men in America should rule the world... and if anyone disagrees, get rid of 'em. And, heck... if it weren't for those dang non-whites in America... I get these 'things' that come over me sometimes... Don't worry. My doctor says I'm all better, now. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: DONTHEN To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Horsey-panky? Date & Time: 10/27/89 00:02:40 Message Number 153 Well, the centaurs are also running thru Furversion #18--most of what Michael Higgs draws, for example, and some of Mary Hanson-Roberts' depressingly cute creatures qualify, too. Of course Chip is from a different race--but so are elves and humans. In "Only With Thine Eyes," the species differences are of extreme importance, but that may be due to social taboos more than anything else. In Ranea, it's treated (mostly) like mixed marraiges on earth, or in slightly less tolerant areas, like human/elven crosses in some D&D worlds (in some really intolerant areas, it might be considered bestiality, but in the state that the Wyvern's Den is located in, it would at best raise a few eyebrows). By the way, how did this come up again? =========== From: DONTHEN To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Storyboard! Date & Time: 10/27/89 00:07:33 Message Number 154 I'd have just one character who travels between the three storyboards. Assume they're separate locations that you can move between. Fred Furball might be in the saloon, say "I'm going to go up to my room now", and then appear in the next message in the Hotel conference.... =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Half human? Date & Time: 10/27/89 02:41:03 Message Number 155 Who're you calling half-human, horseface? I'm 100% reptile and damn proud of it, I'll have you know! =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Storyboard!! Date & Time: 10/27/89 02:43:43 Message Number 156 Well, let's see here. First off, a crocodile character would be perfectly acceptable...might even make for an interesting "Billy the Kid" type of character. It is also certainly possible that one player might like to have a character who "hangs out" in each of the three locations, but since they're all in the same town a single character could appear in all three with relative ease. I am also considering mandating that ALL characters be non-human, but haven't decided yet. (It's kind of a shame PBBS doesn't draw a clearer distinction between message conferences...unless you pay attention to the conference storyboard messages are posted in, things could conceivably get confusing...) I will probably set things up and start the ball rolling in the next week or so, barring unforseen disasters (knock on Billy Graham). =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: Storyboard! Date & Time: 10/27/89 15:35:38 Message Number 159 Sounds good to me, but is this strictly a furry sub-board, or could my 1/6 furry come to town. Oh yea, can we have guns?? big guns?? really large large big guns? (slober) =========== From: RUFUS To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Storyboard! Date & Time: 10/27/89 15:38:45 Message Number 160 hehe, of course you'd have to stand outside at the hitching post. (snicker snicker burp snicker ) =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: DONTHEN Subject: Horsey-panky? Date & Time: 10/27/89 16:58:49 Message Number 161 Dear Donthen, Lots of centaurs in Furversion 18 by Mike Higgs? I just pulled out my copy -- there was ONE centaur by him, out of five pictures... Get a hold of yourself, Donthen... and stay off the mead! You never explained: are cross-species mixtures fertile on the world of Ranea, and... if so, why are there so few? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: 100% turtle? Date & Time: 10/27/89 17:02:15 Message Number 162 Turtle... Hate to say it, but most 100% turtles are not bipedal, do not have hands evolved enough to carry the assault rifle you seem always to be carrying, and most CERTAINLY cannot be jumping up and down the way you seem to be doing right now... Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: RUFUS Subject: Storyboard! Date & Time: 10/27/89 17:05:18 Message Number 163 Dear Rufus, You can bring your cannon with you if you can carry it alone. No 'Stingers,' please. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: This board Date & Time: 10/27/89 17:08:44 Message Number 164 By the way, Turtle, I couldn't log on to the board, so I'm leaving a message here to warn you that your board may be down. Thank you, Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: TURTLE To: RUFUS Subject: Furry story Date & Time: 10/27/89 17:17:36 Message Number 165 It'll probably be strictly furry...no humans. Haven't really decided yet. (I don't think the character Rufus will really fit too well into a Wild West setting anyway...) =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: Furry story Date & Time: 10/28/89 00:20:03 Message Number 166 Hmm..if it's all furry, I guess I go for iguana! Yippie...Scaleys unite! Ribbit.. =========== From: DONTHEN To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Horsey-panky? Date & Time: 10/28/89 14:24:02 Message Number 167 Well, maybe it was Furversion 17, although I count 2 in #18 (p. 1 and p. 44). Cross-species mixes aren't fertile, except for the Sidhe, who can breed successfully with anything (possibly literally). The Sidhe are the local equivalent to dryad-types, and are magic (I'm speaking more of the classical dryad who was considered to be a minor deity, not the wimpy D&D variety). It is possible you could have a more humanlike furry with wild magical powers who was the offspring of some furry and a Sidhe, and it's not completely impossible you could end up with someone who looks like Alicia from "Xanadu" from a Sidhe/Unicorn mating. These offspring are occasionally fertile (at least amongst themselves, although very rarely with anything else except Sidhe) and it's possible that several of the furry races running around got their start that way. =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Yes 100% turtle Date & Time: 10/29/89 13:30:00 Message Number 168 Turtle, of course, is an ANTHROPOMORPHIC reptile. 'Morphs are not human-animal crosses, they are simply bipedal, humanoid alterations to basic animal stock, just like humans are bipedal, hairless monkeys. Turtle has no human blood in him whatsoever. He does, on the other hand, have two legs, two arms ending in 4-digit hands with opposing thumbs, and a REAL BIG gun. =========== From: CRYSTAL To: ALL Subject: HAPPY HALLOWEEN Date & Time: 10/31/89 01:15:22 Message Number 171 OOO OOO OOOOOOOOO OOO OOO OOOOOO OOOOO OOOOO LL LL OOOOO OOO I OOOOO OOOO III OOOO OOOO I OOO OOOO ;; ;; OOOO OOO ;;;;;;;;;; OOO OO OO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO =========== From: CRYSTAL To: ALL Subject: HALLOWEEN Date & Time: 10/31/89 01:21:21 Message Number 172 YES, that really was a pumpkin. I tryed. BUT AT LEAST IT IS A REALLY BAD PUMPKIN. =========== From: CRYSTAL To: ALL FURRIES Subject: HALLOWEENZ Date & Time: 10/31/89 01:25:37 Message Number 173 For all you furries pertend the pumpkin is furry and I made it especially for you. And I guess I wish you a happy (furry) halloween. =========== From: DONTHEN To: CRYSTAL Subject: furry pumpkins? Date & Time: 10/31/89 12:25:13 Message Number 175 I've never heard of an anthropomorphic pumpkin before. Actually, I don't think I want to try and picture that. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: RUFUS Subject: Furry story Date & Time: 10/31/89 13:21:42 Message Number 176 Hmmm... one turtle, one iguana, and one probable crocodile... Are you SURE this can be called a "furry" story? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: Yes 100% turtle Date & Time: 10/31/89 13:23:24 Message Number 177 Well... maybe you're right. (If the gun weren't there, I might say that you proved my point exactly; that you are a "bipedal, humanoid alteration" of a turtle -- and therefore not truly one hundred percent turtle... and the most likely reason you are bipedal and have two arms with hands (and opposing thumbs) is that you have been genetically altered with human genes... but the gun prevents me from doing so.) Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: CRYSTAL Subject: HAPPY HALLOWEEN Date & Time: 10/31/89 13:26:16 Message Number 178 Dear Crystal, A few questions for you: Why aren't there traditional Halloween carols? How long must one wait in the pumpkin patch for the Great Pumpkin to arise? What do the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus do for Halloween? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: CRYSTAL Subject: HALLOWEENZ Date & Time: 10/31/89 13:29:52 Message Number 179 Personally, what I'd love to do some Halloween is to put a very long wig over a pumpkin, and put a sign underneath: "Hippy Halloween!" Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Oct. 31 Date & Time: 10/31/89 14:47:03 Message Number 180 HAPPY SAMHAIN, EVERYBODY!!! =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Hooray! Date & Time: 10/31/89 16:31:01 Message Number 181 The aLTER rEALITY library is now open for your viewing pleasure! Check out some of the text files in the iles section. (Until further notice, the Library will contain text files only; I may set up computer-specific areas if there is sufficient demand, though...) =========== From: TURTLE To: TURTLE Subject: Oh yeah Date & Time: 10/31/89 16:33:12 Message Number 182 More files will be added to the iles section shortly; eventually there will bve a fairly significant amount of randomness there... =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Announcement Date & Time: 10/31/89 17:08:50 Message Number 183 Attention! Attention! MSTF member system U S E R S M E E T I N G ------------------------- When: Saturday, Nov. 11, 12 Noon Where: Le Croissant (on Main Street in Sarasota) Why: Why not? Featuring users from aLTER rEALITY, the Wyvern's Den, and Suncoast City BBS. Attractions: Juggling foxes, death-defying feats, and lots of really neat conversation & stuff. Be there!! =========== From: CRYSTAL To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: y Date & Time: 10/31/89 23:15:21 Message Number 184 >Why aren't there traditional Halloween carols? I could only assume that they all died by being burned at the stake in Salem Mass.(before the had a chance to be put down on paper.) >How long...for the great pumpkin to rise? I would amagine that depends on your partner. !!!!!! >What do the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus do for Halloween? With all the knowledge I have gathered up (or all the B.S.) I would say the Easter Bunny dress up as Santa Claus, and Santa Clause dresses up as the Easter Bunny and they go Egging and TP'ing and Pumpkin smashing all over. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: Y'ALL Subject: Opening Screen Date & Time: 11/01/89 14:48:20 Message Number 185 >"If the beagle sits next to your luggage, you're doomed -- B. Fox" Interesting quote. My stableboy was coming back from Mexico this summer, and one of the guard dogs (an English Spaniel, actually) fell in love with his legs... The dog sat down on his feet at least four times, and would not leave his legs. (A second dog also came by to investigate his legs...) The stable boy was waiting for one piece of baggage to arrive --- and had this "nice chat" with the officer. Well, he eventually was detained for a full hour while he was "inspected, detected, Inspected, Defected... and they left no part untouched" as the Arlo Guthrie song goes. From the evidence of the two dogs, the officers were convinced that this was going to be their biggest "haul" for several months. Finally, the strip search came. When the "bare essentials" were removed, he says he's NEVER seen officers more shell-shocked. Oh. The reason the dogs were following him around. My stable boy's parents had a small dog in Mexico. It appears she was just getting into heat. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: RUFUS To: CRYSTAL Subject: HAPPY HALLOWEEN Date & Time: 11/01/89 16:19:45 Message Number 186 Thanks fer the happy halloween. =========== From: RUFUS To: DONTHEN Subject: furry pumpkins? Date & Time: 11/01/89 16:20:28 Message Number 187 Those were one "Beans Baxter" once. Anyone remeber that show. Beans' dad is a secret agent, and is kidnapped by someone, so Beans takes his place. Wow..what a show. And Beans' little brother, Scooter... wow....I miss it. =========== From: RUFUS To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Furry story Date & Time: 11/01/89 16:21:47 Message Number 188 O.K. A reptily board?? =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: RUFUS Subject: Furry story Date & Time: 11/01/89 17:21:29 Message Number 189 Isn't rep-tile something M. C. Esher would have done? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: DONTHEN To: RUFUS Subject: furry pumpkins? Date & Time: 11/01/89 17:50:57 Message Number 190 I remember "Beans Baxter". One of the strangest shows I've ever seen... sort of like "Get Smart" but a little less realistic.... =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Storyboard! Date & Time: 11/01/89 18:54:49 Message Number 191 Actually, it won't be all THAT scaley; Turtle won't appear in this one. I will probably be running a character named Stripe, a 'morph raccoon. All will be made clear in time, since time steals all things and even mountains go away in time (it's a fairly impressive solvent, almost as good as Coke syrup, only not as sweet), and evidently takes away their color first (hence, things become clear if you dunk them in a big container of Time). Or something like that. What was I saying? I've forgotten. Oh well... =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: Help! Date & Time: 11/02/89 01:24:33 Message Number 193 ...and not only that but we've been transported somehow by a sinister Time Warp a full ten days into the Future! Christopher Lloyd, we need you! =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: Continuing... Date & Time: 11/02/89 01:34:25 Message Number 194 The best reason to continue with SDI is the technological fallout which always results from such projects. For example, the microwave oven - made possible by the invention of Radar, a wartime research project. Besides, in a country where each year over EIGHT BILLION dollars are spent on COSMETICS, for Christ's sakes, crying over money is not valid. =========== From: SAURON To: ALL Subject: seiges Date & Time: 11/02/89 01:45:29 Message Number 195 To those who may have been trying to enter the Dark Tower in vain the past few days...know Ye that the seige has been lifted and it's doors have re-opened. BARAD DUR' 24 Hrs at 3-12-2400 bps 484-9139 =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Re-Announcement Date & Time: 11/02/89 15:31:42 Message Number 196 The MSTF user's meeting has been changed! It is now a large and somewhat disoriented walrus, the disorientation being caused by the fact that the walrus formerly believed itself to be a fun, exciting BBS user's meeting with juggling foxes, really neat conversation, and death-defying feats. Actually, that isn't really true. The only thing that changed about it is the time. Here's the new, improved schedule: WHEN: Saturday, Nov. 11 from 11 AM to 2 PM (or so). WHERE: Le Croissant, of course. WHY: Because Niklaus Wirth doesn't like it. =========== From: RUFUS To: DONTHEN Subject: furry pumpkins? Date & Time: 11/02/89 16:59:44 Message Number 197 But still a great show. And let's not forget Beans' love intrest, Cupcake! =========== From: ANGEL To: TURTLE Subject: Hello back Date & Time: 11/02/89 20:52:38 Message Number 198 Hope springs eternal ... I always check for mail. Thanks for leaving me some. Actually I just tried to page you, but you are unavailable. It's a hell of a night. Just called Wyvern's and the system seems to be down. Excuse me, but I'm two extremely tall screwdrivers to the wind at the moment and I was just looking for electronic company. I've never tried drinking alone before -- now I see why they warn you against it -- no fun at all! I'm babbling. But it is truly indeed a wretched evening. These morbid thoughts will be dispersed with the dawn ... come on Dawn!!!!!! Anyway, take care. Have fun. And don't fall in love with a man half your age... Bye!!! =========== From: CRYSTAL To: DONTHEN Subject: furry pumpkins? Date & Time: 11/02/89 23:42:31 Message Number 199 Get smart, Now that was a show. I remember that one well. "Would you believe" He never could make up a story with out saying that. =========== From: TURTLE To: RUFUS Subject: fuzzy pumpkins? Date & Time: 11/03/89 19:11:51 Message Number 201 >But still a great show! It still doesn't hold a candle to Killer Klowns from Space, though. Now *THERE'S* a movie with everything...a really stupid premiss, lots of bad special effects, zillions of horror movie cliches, and clowns with ray guns...it makes The Stuff look generic! =========== From: TURTLE To: CRYSTAL Subject: flaming pumpkin Date & Time: 11/03/89 19:14:20 Message Number 202 Would you believe a show where the main character always used the same expression over and over? Would you believe in a scriptwriter who thought that was A Neat Device? Would you believe that Elvis is still alive, and his brain is being held hostage by Zygortians from Planet Nine, who are ransoming it for three hundred Hostess Twinkies and the entire library of back issues of The National Enquirer, which they obviously won't get because Elvis' brain isn't worth a ding-dong and a collection of 1984 National Geographics? ...never mind. =========== From: DONTHEN To: TURTLE Subject: flaming pumpkin Date & Time: 11/03/89 22:47:47 Message Number 204 > ... who are ransoming it for three hundred Hostess Twinkies ... > ... which they obviously won't get because Elvis' brain isn't worth a > ding-dong ... Well, which is it? Twinkies, or Ding Dongs? I prefer Yodels and, of course, Sno-Balls myself. =========== From: YNGLING To: TURTLE Subject: What gives? Date & Time: 11/04/89 00:51:51 Message Number 205 Jeez, I'm gone for a couple weeks due to viral contamination; finally get my hands on a 'puter for an evening; and discover I've been dropped from the user files. What a friendly reptile you turned out to be. I still havent cured my pc so dont bother leaving a reply (which I'm sure would have contained an apology). Just thought I'd drop in and say hi. Hi. There I've done it. =========== From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX To: TURTLE Subject: Party Foxes Date & Time: 11/04/89 02:46:58 Message Number 206 Am I expected to juggle, or will someone be attempting to juggle me? By the way, hi, I'm here. But you knew that. I might be dragging some of the Tampan MSTF people down with me... at least part of the "crowd" that attended the FurryParty. They thought it was kinda odd that the MSTF GT would be in Sarasota, though. (grin) =========== From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Opening Screen Date & Time: 11/04/89 02:51:43 Message Number 207 The beagle looks for apples and animal products. It's an awfully cute puppy. Not at all like the six-foot, 300 pound, snarling German Shepards with the six-inch drool-covered fangs that greet you at most European airports. The beagle wears a cute little green jacket, too. "Beagle Brigade," of course. ///FOX =========== From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX To: YNGLING Subject: What gives? Date & Time: 11/04/89 02:56:27 Message Number 208 I love it when people read the logon so carefully. =========== From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX To: TURTLE Subject: Like, yo... Date & Time: 11/04/89 02:57:15 Message Number 209 I have come to (dis)grace your board with my overwhelming presents... or something like that. What presents, you ask? Well, I don't really know. I was just quoting someone I don't know personally. Oh yeah, this is my official registration. Handle: Fox Real Name: Phil Reason: (in debate) Excuse: none References: Nicklaus Wirth, Bill Gates, Jack Tramiel, Dan Quayle I guess I'll probably call back, now that I've called once. Of course, that means I'll be spending even more non-existant funds on calling a board I have no hope of actually participating on in the way I'd prefer. Oh, that reminds me. I want to set up a small network of sorts, linking aLTER rEALITY, The Wyvern's Den, and the MKKS Z-Station (M.S.B. -- my system... when it bothers to be on-line) so we can all keep in E-contact without me spending all my non-money on calls to Sarasota all the time. We might even maybe perhaps possibly mull over thinking about the concep of considering the possibility of perchance connecting with the "Gossip Echo" Down Your Way and the MSTF-wanna-be Doctors' Walk-In BBS up here; could call it the Suncoast Gossip Echo, or something equally FIDO-ish... Well, I'll talk to ya later. Gimme call. Seeya on the 11th otherwise. TAYL! Fox (I like just "Fox" as opposed to "Bartholomew Fox," don't you? Maybe a handle change would be in order. Or I could go as "Slobbering Infant" or "Babbling Moron" or somesuch. Or... or I could be an IBM user.... Nah. Screw it. Later... " =========== From: CRYSTAL To: DONTHEN Subject: flaming pumpkin Date & Time: 11/04/89 11:51:12 Message Number 210 Yes but you forgot to mention the hostess cup cakes. Those are my favorite. =========== From: DONTHEN To: ALL Subject: Howdy... Date & Time: 11/04/89 19:50:24 Message Number 212 Yep, if you'd-a seen this place about a year ago, you wouldn't think anythin' short a levelin' it woulda cleaned it up. Miz Sable sure seems to have a way with a business. Take the bar itself. Nobody but Georgia woulda been able to get a mahogany top--well, that ain't true, but nobody but her woulda been able to /keep/ one in such good shape, considerin' the folks who usually come through these parts. That's the way she does everything--nothin' but th best. Don't know if the curs around here deserve it, ya know? People still call the Black Dog a dive, but it ain't one. Ya can tell that just by lookin' around. Georgia Sable herself is in the back somewhere, I suppose. Right pretty woman for her age, but if you're a man, it's her daughter you better look out fer. Sherry's about the cutest thing in a dress you've ever seen, and if she's feelin' playful, she'll drive everythin' out of your mind except wonderin' if she's the cutest thing out of a dress, too I hear tell she--no, Georgia'd kill me if I spread that. 'Sides, Sherry would tell ya herself if she likes you. Heh. The piano player? Don't know much about him. Calls himself Butch. Don't know where he got the eye-patch, either. Doesn't say a whole lot, but plays the keys pretty well. By the way, I'm Ralph. So, what'll it be? =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Hey! Date & Time: 11/04/89 23:46:48 Message Number 213 The Files area is growing by leaps and bounds. Several new text files have been added, and there is now a new area: ascii pictures! I have a few ASCII pictures (no GIF viewer needed; no graphics card needed; just print 'em out) on file, and will add more shortly. I am considering adding a GIF pictures area; if you're interested, let me know. In the meantime, take a look at what's there... =========== From: THE SEEKER To: ALL Subject: Another .. Date & Time: 11/05/89 12:44:53 Message Number 215 ...creative BBS, Suncoast City, 953-5505... New games for the creative: XORU - a medieval fantasy text adventure...VERY complex and fascinating: best online text adventure I've ever seen: all computers can play, and if you get ANSI color, it shows it... First time callers can play.... ...AND... Suncoast City/Wyvern's Den picnick this coming Saturday, at Le Croissant, center city Sarasota, (Main St): great conversation, great food (cheap, too), and a few suprises: all callers (i.e., everyone who reads this) welcome! 11 AM to 2 PM... Hope to meet you there! =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: fuel injection Date & Time: 11/06/89 01:02:05 Message Number 219 Since I hate to call any Board and not post anything, but I have nothing special to scream about, I thought I'd step out oof character and express the hope that you and all your users have had a pleasant weekend. ( but Jane Fonda STILL eats at the Y' ) =========== From: STRIPE To: ALL Subject: Gettin' Started Date & Time: 11/06/89 07:40:48 Message Number 220 The tall, lanky raccoon glares at the noonday sun with a sour expression as he strides down the dusty street toward the Black Dog Saloon--a common destination for him, particularly seeing how's it's a fairly quiet Saturday and the place should be open any minute now. He is, naturally enough, feeling quite hung-over and is therefore in an even grouchier mood than usual, which is right remarkable, consideing that he's got a legendary temper 'round these parts--not to mention being one of the fastest draws around. (It's for the latter reason that folks don't usually call him a grouch, 'ceptin if they have maybe 50 other people with them...) Stripe gives the world one more glare before pushing into the Black Dog, which at the moment is totally deserted save for Ralph. Exactly the way he wants it... The raccoon sits heavily at the bar and without preamble orders a whiskey--straight up. "Rough night, Stripe?" Ralph says without sympathy as he pours the drink. The raccoon grunts and tosses back the dark brown liquid, then orders another. "Stagecoach due in today," he thinks to himself as he idly fingers the silver star pinned to his vest. "Things'll be picking up before too long. Should be an interesting day..." =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: It's HERE!!! Date & Time: 11/06/89 08:13:49 Message Number 221 The Black Dog Saloon is now open for business! Step right up, git yerself a character, have a drink! Here's some background info for you to help get you started... The Black Dog Saloon is located in the town of Hell's Bluff, a typical middlin' large settlement out west somewhere. Hell's Bluff don't have much to reccomend it to anyone, 'cept for its location (seeing how 'least two major stagecoach paths intersect here). The saloon is owned by Miss Georgia Sable, who also owns the Aces High Casino 'cross town, and the Gentleman Stranger hotel, the only one worth talkin' about for at least a hundred miles around. (More on these establishments later...) Georgia and her daughter Sherry are, naturally enough, sables. Some of the other characters around here may need a little intro- duction, too. Butch, the piano player at the Black Dog, is a canine type; looks rather like Spuds Mackenzie with an eyepatch. Ralph, the bartender, is a genial, outgoing silver fox And, of course, you've already met Stripe... =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Dumb reptiles Date & Time: 11/06/89 08:40:00 Message Number 222 Due to a phenomanally stupid operator error, all previous messages posted in conference 7 (Social Issues) have gone away...perhaps I shall take this as incentive to begin backing up the message base from time to time. =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Music Date & Time: 11/06/89 14:35:56 Message Number 224 Some music acts I'd like to see... + Dolly Parton and Ronnie Dio performing a duet. Any duet. + An Iron Maiden remake of "You Light Up My Life." + A Simon and Garfunkel version of Metallica's "Master of Puppets." + A Stevie Wonder/Anthrax charity concert. + Finally, Golden Earring performing their version of "Like a Virgin"... =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: SAURON Subject: Continuing... Date & Time: 11/06/89 21:37:50 Message Number 225 Eight billion dollars spent on cosmetics? Sheesh! What percent of that does Tammy Fae get? (And what percent of that does she spend on herself?) Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: fuzzy pumpkins? Date & Time: 11/06/89 21:40:59 Message Number 226 I had the misfortune of seeing the first about forty minutes of Killer Klowns From Outer Space. (All four legs were tied to stakes nailed in the ground, and it took me fourty minutes to work them out..) A few of the special effects were... interesting, and I'd love to know what the scriptwriter was on when he created this plot, but it's the kind of movie which: "If it comes into your town again, here's your golden opportunity: you can miss it again." Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: flaming pumpkin Date & Time: 11/06/89 21:44:44 Message Number 227 In a nutshell, yes. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: BARTHOLOMEW FOX Subject: Party Foxes Date & Time: 11/06/89 21:45:44 Message Number 228 How 'bout this idea: alternate monthly between Sarasota and Tampa for the MSTF meeting. The SaraTampa (or is it TamSara? whatever) furries are just about evenly split between the two cities... (of course, you could be like Donthen & Turtle, who'd drive to Atlanta for the SaraTampa MSTF meeting...) Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: SAURON Subject: fuel injection Date & Time: 11/06/89 21:50:27 Message Number 229 Dear Sauron, I thank you kindly for your inquiring over my weekend. I have had a very pleasant weekend, as I received a weekend pass to visit my filly who lives about five hours away. Although I missed dearly my close acquintences from the world of computers, we spent a mutually profitable weekend together (chaperoned, of course.) Can I quit the Victorian twiddle now? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: Music Date & Time: 11/06/89 21:55:42 Message Number 230 So it's YOUR altered reality that caused the Pet Shop Boys to try to remake "You Were Always On My Mind." Additions to that list: + Howard Jones doing a song involving only guitars. (ANY song) + Squeeze doing some song that does not sound like every other song they've done. + Any New Age song that actually has a beginning and ending... Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: PARTNERS Subject: Howdy Date & Time: 11/06/89 22:08:26 Message Number 231 [from the Crocodile Roc'namus] Walking by the Black Dog Saloon, I glance in. The only customer is Stripe, so I walk in. In a town where most folk wear fur, a crocodile is a rare enough sight -- and usually avoided. There ain't no crocodile that doesn't look gruff: having as many teeth as we do helps with the image. Though I've never done anything to dispell the image of "rough and ready," I've made a few friends in the town. What th' hell. If I'm gonna try and be social-like today, might as well stop in at the Saloon. As I walk through the doors, I tip my brown Stetson to Ralph. For some reason, whenever I enter, he always changes his song to one I don't recognise, muttering something about "early Elton John." I mosey up to the bar. "Ralph, pour me a beer." Silently, he turns around and pulls me a mug. It's gulped down in a few seconds. I turn to Stripe, fingering his badge. "So, when's the coach runnin' through town?" =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: Problem Date & Time: 11/06/89 22:25:17 Message Number 232 Dear Turtle, Tried to log off your system. It wouldn't let me... You might try fixing the "goodbye" sequence... Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: ANGEL To: WHATEVER Subject: Zsa-zsa Date & Time: 11/06/89 23:58:05 Message Number 234 Did you hear Zsa-zsa is introducing a new line of men's cologne. It's called Conviction ... you just slap it on. =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Fuzzy clowns! Date & Time: 11/07/89 02:41:57 Message Number 235 Oh, c'mon, where's your sense of The Great Universal Unifying Aura of Really Bad Movies?! Killer Klowns from Space is...well, a unique movie-going experience, and one the mere mortal doesn't often get the opportunity to enjoy... the movie is a classic! It's like "The Stuff" and "Battle Beyond the Stars" all rolled into one! A true intergalactic stupid treat! =========== From: DONTHEN To: TURTLE Subject: Ha! Date & Time: 11/07/89 09:35:30 Message Number 237 The external program needs to check for carrier drop on its own; there is a flag in high memory now to check for local logons. Yes, you'd have to modify the door programs to do that. Big, fat, hairy deal. If you think you can write a short high-mem routine that PBBSH can install that can do carrier check as a background task, and reload PBBSH (or if PBBSH protects itself, just jump to "START" so it reloads PBBS from that point), I'll be glad to integrate it in. Making the door two-way would be massively tricky, though; PBBSH would need to save all the current user information in CURRENT/USR somehow, *and* modify PBBS to look for a CURRENT/USR file after it initializes--if it's there, it would read it in, kill the file, and jump to the main menu. It could be made "one-and-a-half-way" by letting people reload PBBS and relog on; the door supervisor program (i.e., the menu of things to do) could keep its own mini-userlog maintaining a last call date and time limit, and thus make sure people only spend a certain amount of time in the door each day. Aforementioned background task ^ could also check the keyboard for F1, a key that ostensibly couldn't be sent from the modem, and go to a mini-chat mode when it's pressed. The carrier detect routine would be fairly simple, but /you're/ the one who says he knows how to make the computer drop what it's doing and reload the program on the advice of a measly little background task.... =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: ANGEL Subject: Randomness Date & Time: 11/07/89 12:44:49 Message Number 238 Did you hear they're cancelling Easter next year? They found the body. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: Fuzzy clowns! Date & Time: 11/07/89 12:45:39 Message Number 239 Unicorns are born without a Universal Unifying Aura of Really Bad Movies. Maybe that's why we're not that well-established in the Galactic community... Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHARLES DITTELL To: ALL Subject: Programming Date & Time: 11/08/89 18:55:10 Message Number 241 If you do any programming, in ANY language, for ANY computer type, call Suncoast City BBS and tell the Sysop (me, Charles Dittell) what you've done. Suncoast City has a C & F Distributing area, where we feature locally written software. We (Frank Merrill and myself) also call many l.d. bbs's and upload files from local authors. We've both written some programs (in QuickBasic, and shortly in Turbo Pascal and then "C"), and would be happy to evaluate your program(s)! Give a call : Suncoast City BBS (813)953-5505. Oh, there's no cost involved: we do it 'cause we like to.... =========== From: CHARLES DITTELL To: ALL Subject: Picnick!!! Date & Time: 11/08/89 18:58:42 Message Number 242 This coming Saturday! 11 AM (you can do it!) to 2 pm, at Le Croissant in center city Sarasota (main street). Great fun, great conversation, great food, great food prices).... Hope to see you there! =========== From: TURTLE To: PS:<*> Subject: * Date & Time: 11/09/89 04:01:39 Message Number 243 "Hey, Noah!" "What?" "What is that thing?" "It's an ark!" "You wanna get it out of my driveway? What's that thing for, anyway?" "I can't tell you, ha ha ha ha." "Will you give me a hint?" "You want a hint?" "Yeah!" "How long can you tread water? Ha ha ha ha." =========== From: STRIPE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Howdy Date & Time: 11/09/89 17:27:46 Message Number 246 The raccoon fixes the intrusive alligator with a nasty glare. "You!" he bellows, then winces and holds his head. Somewhat more quietly, he continues, "You got some nerve talklin' to me all friendly-like after last night...but then, I suppose you can afford to, can't you? Mr. 'Oh-look-another-full-house' himself. Have you spent all my money yet? I've half a mind to bust your varmint ass for creatin' a public nuisance, you know." He turns away from the reptile and back to the bar, with a "Coach should be here in about half an hour or so, just like every Saturday." =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Easter Date & Time: 11/09/89 17:33:26 Message Number 247 What? No Easter this year? Such a pity...I do so enjoy telling small children that the Easter Bunny has been hit by a truck... =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Hey!! Date & Time: 11/09/89 17:34:16 Message Number 248 It's here...the official PBBS Mail Check program! It *should* tell you whenever you have messages or private mail working...but it may still be a leetle buggy, so report any problems to Turtle and he'll try to fix 'em... Coming soon... Doors to weirdness! KludgeNet (tm) echo areas! A large, well-constructed temple-like building, with many interesting stained-glass windows and doors made from solid brass! Progress...where we're going, we don't *need* progress! =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: DONTHEN Subject: David Date & Time: 11/09/89 18:45:12 Message Number 249 Donthen -- Couldn't log on to your board; no one was home. David Brandson (sp?) is coming tomorrow... he'll be at the bus station between four and four thirty P.M. Yes, this is a threat. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: ANGEL To: TURTLE Subject: Picnic Date & Time: 11/09/89 20:34:59 Message Number 250 Anyone know the exact address of la Crescent (can't spell French)? I tend to get lost in my own driveway, so exact numeric addresses are a great asset to me. Hope to see ya all there providing I get back from St. Pete at a decent hour. Going to see Hal Holbrook as Mark Twain. Just thought I'd share that with you. =========== From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX To: TURTLE Subject: Halfshell Date & Time: 11/10/89 01:56:41 Message Number 251 Or Hardshell Software. KludgeNet. Cute name, but it sounds really kinda like sorta FIDOrk. But, hey... this sounds awful system-to-system (as opposed to a real net). Sounds like it could work! Sounds like it'll take some work, too, though. Oh well... sounds like the sorta project I could get into. HEY, by the way, I'm not sure how it works, but BYE519 and BYE520 are supposed to be "Fido/Opus/Tabby compatible." Would that help? I'm gonna probably write my own BBS software from the ground up anyway. This message is real coherent, isn't it? Damn, I really hate my brain when it's this tired. Why am I bothering even to type at you now when I'll see you in person Saturday? Why am I asking you that question in a message? Why am I asking you something which I won't get to see the answer to before I see you anyway? Shit. I'm really tired, and my brain leaks. See ya later... xoF dezufnoC -- =========== From: RUFUS To: ANGEL Subject: Picnic Date & Time: 11/10/89 15:27:31 Message Number 252 All I can say is it's after where Main Street turns into a one way street. A whole lotta help, huh? =========== From: TURTLE To: RUFUS Subject: Gnu BBS Date & Time: 11/10/89 18:00:35 Message Number 255 When will the hours be extended? I trust it will eventually become a 24 hour system; it's really difficult to run a limited-hour board. Everyone always calls outside the proscribed hours... =========== From: SAURON To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: fuel injection Date & Time: 11/10/89 20:31:18 Message Number 256 You tempt me sorely ( Saurally?) to step back into character and inquire if it was time off for good behavior or... Yes - you may now de-twiddle. =========== From: SAURON To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Continuing... Date & Time: 11/10/89 20:34:57 Message Number 257 (Tammy) I'd say most. =========== From: SAURON To: ANYONE WHO'LL LISTEN Subject: HER Date & Time: 11/10/89 20:36:42 Message Number 258 SREW ANN LANDERS! (You - not me ) =========== From: ANGEL To: TURTLE Subject: Hello... Date & Time: 11/11/89 01:45:22 Message Number 260 Good lord, reptile, we're neighbors! I live in Spring Oaks, the back entrance of which opens on to 301 just opposite Shadowood. Thanks for the offer of a follow, but at this hour I'm not sure I'll be getting up at an early time. Just got back from Hal Holbrook, and it was a trip! He was indescribably fantastic. Anyway, hope to see you tomorrow providing I wake up in time to see tomorrow. =========== From: TURTLE To: SAURON Subject: HER Date & Time: 11/11/89 03:08:27 Message Number 261 Thanks for the kind offer, but I'd really rather not srew anybody... don't you know that srewing is illegal in seventeen states? Anyway, I'll bite: What's with Ann Landers? Why rant about her in particular when there are so many other people (Jerry Falwell, Jeremy Rifkin, Dan Quayle, Jane Fonda, Oral Roberts) who are infinitely more deserving of it? =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Never do this Date & Time: 11/11/89 03:11:15 Message Number 262 Here is a list of Things Not To Do: Wear night vision goggles to a fireworks display. Carry nitroglycerine in a backpack. Juggle cactuses. Wear a hearing aid to a heavy metal concert. And finally, eat microwaved pizza while sitting alone in a dark room listening to "Pink Floyd The Final Cut"... =========== From: TURTLE To: +++ Subject: Amazing thing Date & Time: 11/11/89 03:16:55 Message Number 263 Well, the McDonald's corporation, long a "politically correct" fast food place (they have never used Argentinian beef, they don't support Icelandic whaling, they use styrofoam containers inflated with carbon dioxide instead of flourocarbons, etc, etc) has just announced a bold new move in the right direction: McD's in several states now recycle all their plastic, foam, and cardboard refuse. Wow, like, really intense, ya know? ---~--- Seriously, though, it IS always good to see a major multinational corporation actually DO something about problems like overflowing landfills and depleted resources. Too bad more corporations aren't willing to be as responsible... ---~--- ...or more people for that matter. ---~--- Hey, this is, like, my home, ya know? I wouldn't approve of people arriving at my doorstep and dumping garbage in my living room; why should I approve of people dumping it anmywhere else? Especially when it still contains perfectly usable resources... ---~--- OK, so call me one o' dem pinko liberal environmentalists. I've never seen the point of taking renewable resources and making them non- renewable, or of throwing away everything you can get your hands on and then bellyaching 'cause it's all getting harder to find and you can't find any place to put the waste... =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: SAURON Subject: fuel injection Date & Time: 11/11/89 19:30:44 Message Number 264 (I'm wondering what the subject has to do with our current conversation... Oh, well: these are the norms for BBS'ing.) Twiddle? My dear sir! I do not twiddle! I neither twiddle, tweak, twine, twosome, twy two twalk like twis, nor twongelles. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: SAURON Subject: HER Date & Time: 11/11/89 19:33:29 Message Number 265 And how can one 'srew' a person? My OED doesn't list that verb. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: STRIPE Subject: Our story Date & Time: 11/11/89 19:36:32 Message Number 266 I smile back at our sherriff. "Well, some days, some of us are lucky." "And twice in a row, you were dealt three aces!" shouts Stripe. "Three aces!" I just smile and say nothing. Stripe didn't notice the deck wasn't shuffled between the two times I got three aces... I down the rest of my brew, pay for the beer, and leave a tip the size of the cost of my beer -- just to spite Stripe a bit. As I leave the Black Dog Saloon, I nod to Butch. The town is idolated -- not a soul in the dirt street can be seen. I peel off some cigarrette paper, pour a little tobacco in, seal my cigarette, and light it from a nearby torch. It was going to be a long day. =========== From: ANGEL To: TURTLE ET AL Subject: Picnic Date & Time: 11/11/89 23:44:24 Message Number 267 It was a pleasure to finally get to meet you and all the furry group a la Crescent Roll today. It's nice to have a face to put to the names and conversations. Take care, neighbor! =========== From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX To: STRIPE Subject: coons 'n' yiprs Date & Time: 11/11/89 23:52:53 Message Number 268 Arf! Fur yer files, my REAL address is... (are you ready for this?) (No? Oh well, no problem... most people have my PO Box only which is good cuz I'm not into visitors... especially people like that Mr. D guy, or worse yet, SCOTT ALSTON) (Oh, you're ready now? Okay...) Uhm, oh yeah, the address. Right. OK! Bartholomew Fox (aka Bill Biersdorf, or whatever) P.O. Box (JUST KIDDING... yeah, I know, you HAVE that one; OK, really:) 13206 Tifton Drive Tampa, FL 33618-3022 (phone: 1-961-5747) *YIP* Any other inanee questions? No? Damn. OK, I (oh screw it -- the address is all you really wanted -- I am just being obnoxious now. Sorry. LIKE, LATER DUDE!!) /// FOX =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: MSTF meeting Date & Time: 11/12/89 04:54:15 Message Number 269 Well, the MSTF meeting (and subsequent weirdness) yesterday was a great success...even if half the people who were /supposed/ to appear seemed to have a gratuitous existance failure... In other news, it appears my phone line has recently been tapped by unknown persons, for unknown reasons. Please bear with us, and the situation may be remedied in the not-so-distant future (gods permitting). I hope this does not present *too* great a damper to creative spirits... =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: Gnu BBS Date & Time: 11/12/89 09:15:35 Message Number 270 Well, once I get another drive and serial card, it'll be 24hr on the ole Franklin Ace 1000. I'd just like to be around for the first week so if any nasty bugs pop up ( which I've had before ) I can fix them. =========== From: CYBERPUNK To: ALL Subject: story Date & Time: 11/12/89 11:01:03 Message Number 271 as the Crocadile and the racoon are arguing over the card game the night before and the money, they didn't notice the guy who walked in the door. he sat down next to the alligator and said "Hi, my name is Talon, what's new around here??? I'm new in town..." (by the way, he is Human) and he orders a beer. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: 'Trit' machine Date & Time: 11/12/89 15:14:25 Message Number 272 Some comments about your 'trit' (trinary digit) machine: Let's call the three states possible on the machine 'T' or 2 for absolutely true (corresponding to 1 on a binary machine), 'U' or 1 for an uncertain response (no correspondence, of course), and 'F' or 0 for absolutely false (corresponding to a zero on a binary machine.) I've only come up with one major advantage for trinary machines: there would only need to be one flag for compare and for zero. (Instead of Donthen's idea: zero, not zero, and kinda zero) After a compare statement, the 'compare' flag is 2 for x>y, 1 if x=y, or 0 if xn...) =========== From: ROCKY To: ALL.... Subject: Movies.... Date & Time: 11/12/89 20:39:21 Message Number 276 You guys are gonna think I'm weird or something, but I just got the video tapes of "Bambi" and "The Land Before Time" and really enjoyed them!!!! God, it had been so many years since I heard "That's why they call me Thumper" that I just had this terrible urge to go out and get the video. Being the classics that both of these movies are (Land Before Time had no choice but to become a classic, being a Lucas/Spielberg production), I'll have you ALL know that, YES, I did truely enjoy watching these classics, and YES, they still excite and elate, and YES! I did CRY!!!! So there!!!! But seriously, these movies still get me every time. =========== From: STRIPE To: ALL Subject: Introductions Date & Time: 11/12/89 21:17:19 Message Number 277 Stripe watched the crocodile go, obviously so intent on impressing him with his new-found wealth that he totally ignored the stranger and walked out without saying a word to anybody (except his reflexive goodbye to the not-present Butch). The furry sherriff grunted in slight amusement and turned his attention to Talon, scrutinizing him from head to foot. Human, which was uncommon around these parts; expensively dressed; a total stranger. After the examination, Stripe extended a hand and said "Well, welcome to my town. Things are usually slow around here, but that's the way I like it, if you catch my drift. Gonna be a stagecoach arriving soon. So, whereabouts ar you from, and what brings you to Hell's Bluff? You don't rightly look like most of the folks we get in these parts." =========== From: RUFUS To: ROCKY Subject: Movies.... Date & Time: 11/13/89 16:46:47 Message Number 278 I like Bambi myself, even thought I havn't seen it in a few years. I havn't seen "The Land Before Time" yet. I really like "Lady & the Tramp" and "The Fox and the Hound." =========== From: TURTLE To: RUFUS Subject: Movies.... Date & Time: 11/13/89 17:31:24 Message Number 279 "Bambi" is a fairly good movie, but not as good as what I've seen of "Fantasia" (never seen the entire thing; I keep waiting in vain for it to be re-released...) "The Land Before Time" looks entirely too... cute for my tastes. The animation in it is amazing, even if some of the effects remind me very strongly of the video game "Dragon's Lair" (not surprising, since they were both animated by Don Bluth, who incidentally has a /new/ movie out now...) As far as touching, sentimental films go, though, "Blade Runner" and "Alien" are more my cup of tea. (He he he...) =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Trinary machine Date & Time: 11/13/89 17:36:32 Message Number 280 How exactly do you plan to model this thing, anyway? You can certainly store the trits as a series of bits with X bits representing Y trits, but man, would the algorithm for extracting a trit stream from a bit stream be beastly! If you're only going to emulate a 4-trit micro- processor with limited memory, it might be better to use a simple two-bits-equals-one-trit scheme. Sure it'll waste prodigious amounts of memory, but if you're modeling a 1 kilotrit machine on a 640 kilobyte computer, so what? It will speed things up enormously and make the program MUCH simpler to write. I'd only worry about more efficient storage if I were modeling a /big/ trinary computer, and doing it in assembly so encoding and decoding trinary digits would still be fast. =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: trinary again Date & Time: 11/13/89 17:42:06 Message Number 281 Oh yeah. Using three-phase AC to represent the three possible trinary states is a somewhat dubious proposition at best. It certainly wouldn't work with existing semiconductor technology, and providing a power supply to such a machine would be a beastly job. I prefer my idea (-5V, 0V, +5V to represent F, U, and T)...it could be implemented without a great deal of difficulty using conventional solid-state devices, and such a machine's architecture wouldn't differ /too/ radically from conventional computers... =========== From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX To: ROCKY Subject: Movies.... Date & Time: 11/13/89 22:25:32 Message Number 282 I'm still waiting to afford my copy of Bambi. I'd really be happy if Disney would concent to release the occasional tape in letter-box format though... but somehow I doubt it'll ever happen (they still make money off of the re-releases every seven years because people want to see the whole picture... REAL BIG). The Land Before Time, like everything Don Bluth has ever done, was really beautifully animated. When I saw the movie, I really didn't like the story very much, but I would probably have to see it again to be sure how I feel now. Have you seen Bluth's other films, specifically An American Tail and The Secret of NIMH? (I have the latter title on tape finally.) If you like his work, you might be interesed in knowing his latest film (All Dogs Go To Heaven) is coming out now, as is the latest Disney release, The Little Mermaid. One of these days I'm going to HAVE to get "The Fox and the Hound." /// THE FOX =========== From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX To: RUFUS Subject: Fox & Dinosaur Date & Time: 11/13/89 22:31:13 Message Number 283 The Land Before Time was the Anthropomorphic Dinosaur movie that came out a few months back. It's already on tape! The theatre in Tampa where I saw it played this FANTASTIC 10-minute short before called The Family Dog. It was really rough animated (clean, but with probably intentionally hand-written-looking lines) but the story was better than the feature! Arf! =========== From: WONDERDORK To: PSYCHE Subject: Laser shows Date & Time: 11/14/89 16:11:22 Message Number 286 YES THEY DO ALAN PARSON'S SHOWS =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: Movies.... Date & Time: 11/14/89 20:52:35 Message Number 287 I'm trying to remeber this movie(?) that had a wonderfuly funny scene where two wizards ( one an old male, one an old female ) had a duel. they kept on changing into diffrent animals to try and destroy the other one. I remeber one of the rules was no imaginary animals. I'd like to see it again because it was great. =========== From: RUFUS To: BARTHOLOMEW FOX Subject: Movies.... Date & Time: 11/14/89 20:55:34 Message Number 288 I LOVE "The Fox and the Hound"!! What a movie. I don't care what anyone says, I loved it. =========== From: RUFUS To: BARTHOLOMEW FOX Subject: Fox & Dinosaur Date & Time: 11/14/89 20:57:48 Message Number 289 Way off base, but they have a graphic novel about dinosaurs who are hit men. What I saw, it was pretty funny. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: 'Trit' machine Date & Time: 11/15/89 14:51:17 Message Number 290 My thoughts exactly. But -- and here's the real question -- would it really be possible to shrink a trinary machine to the size that microchips are headed? (There's talk of using the spins of individual atoms as the binary mechanism; not much chance of changing that to trinary.) I was (and still am) a bit sick at the time, so I may not have explained myself perfectly clearly. I realized that standard binary logic would not work in a trinary machine, so I "invented" new operators that would do the work of AND and OR of stripping trytes. (And they keep much of the original flavor of AND and OR!) I was saying that there would probably NOT be a logical way to transfer a computer scientist's idea of NOT into a trinary machine. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: Trinary machine Date & Time: 11/15/89 14:58:04 Message Number 291 Eight bits = Five trits isn't all THAT hard for a computer to figure out; if you have memory to waste, use a 243-place table in memory. (In the interests of speed, you'd probably need 486 bytes for the table.) If one were to simulate a large trit machine, using a table would waste only a little bit of memory (instead of wasting four bits for every trit), and still run relatively fast. (It might lose maybe a few clicks looking up the equivalents...) Even in a three-K simulated tryt machine, the simulation with table will use less memory than yours. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: BARTHOLOMEW FOX Subject: Movies.... Date & Time: 11/15/89 15:04:44 Message Number 292 Oh, yeah... remind me, next time I go up to Tampa: I have something else for you that I got in a Christian bookstore. (A beautiful witness for Christ... a momento that you'll treasure for a lifetime. A... Cut the crap. He's not believing it.) Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: RUFUS Subject: Movies.... Date & Time: 11/15/89 15:07:00 Message Number 293 Two films that I know of that fit the description: "The Sword in the Stone" had a battle between Merlin and a CUTE old witch that fits your description... Merlin kept choosing tiny forms, and the witch terribly powerful-looking forms. "Willow" -- I believe -- had a live-action sequence of scenes like that. The old "good" one had to change form several times before she was human again... then came the spell match. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: RUFUS To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Movies.... Date & Time: 11/15/89 16:50:30 Message Number 294 It must be "The Sword in the Stone" since it was animated. =========== From: RUFUS To: ALL Subject: The BBS Date & Time: 11/15/89 16:52:31 Message Number 295 Well, the Zero G BBS is as 24 hrs. as it gets. I still use it for school stuff, so if it doesn't answer, I'm using it. NUMBER: 371-3498 BAUD: 300/1200/2400 ( 2400 has been acting up, so try 1200 if 2400 won't work ). BE SURE TO HIT RETURN A FEW TIMES AFTER YOU CONNECT. =========== From: CRYSTAL To: RUFUS Subject: Zero "G" Date & Time: 11/16/89 00:29:30 Message Number 296 I tried to re-log on to your board, but all passwords I tried to use did not work. All pass-numbers I've tried do not work. I do not even know if I can log on again with my username. These and many unanswered questions will come up again and again. I quess will work it out any- way I wanted you to know. Thanks for all the help. SEE YAA crystal =========== From: TURTLE To: BARTHOLOMEW FOX Subject: Addresses Date & Time: 11/16/89 05:01:10 Message Number 297 My address: 5700 N Tamiami Trail #242 Sarasota, FL 34243 ---~--- The sysop of Remote Control (the MSTF wanna be down here) is: Tyler Robinson 4953 Greencroft Road Sarasota, FL 34235 ---~--- You should send him the MSTF application, your card, etc, etc... =========== From: ONYOURSELF To: ALL Subject: wam Date & Time: 11/16/89 16:16:08 Message Number 298 a new feminist group. pretty radical. I mean, just a bit political and i hope the cia doesnt get after us. you see, we call ourselves wam. women against men? almost, but not as antagonistic. we're women against men struation. like i said, its a little bit radical, and i havent quit figured out the dietary requirements but people are really enthusiastic lookout navahos, we're getting smart, too. yes, you too can do away with all that messiness and stupid comments about bitchiness, women of the world will really and truly be equal. i'm excited, yes folks, na grass- roots cultural, biological revolution. and it all starts right here. or should i say ends...period. by the way, if this doesnt quite work out the way i anticipate, i have a plan b. that's b for blood. wifomm. yes, wifomm. women in favor of men menstruating. a little more radical but i think we can do it, i mean, make them do it, of course. =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: ONYOURSELF Subject: wam Date & Time: 11/16/89 17:34:34 Message Number 299 I refuse to join any organization in which the proponent doesn't know how to use capitals. AND I DON'T MEAN SPEAKING LIKE THIS. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: New Log-on Date & Time: 11/16/89 17:35:48 Message Number 300 I LIKE it! Too bad you don't have the PDP hooked up to the TRS-80.... you'll REALLY give people shocks if/when we get it working. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: RUFUS To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: New Log-on Date & Time: 11/16/89 20:15:17 Message Number 301 I agree, it's diffrent. =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: wam Date & Time: 11/16/89 05:44:36 Message Number 305 but chip, don't you think capital letters are just a little domineering? equality of letterhood is an important cause, too... =========== From: TURTLE To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: PDP... Date & Time: 11/16/89 05:45:50 Message Number 306 I will be talking this weekend to a person who has a PDP 11/23. He has a PDP Unibus controller for 8" drives, and two DEC 8" floppies. Whether or not he'll give/sell them to us is a different story. (If he does, I can get RSTS...the PDP /single user/ operating system...on 8" floppies from a guy in Virginia (not scvm)...) Networking the PDP to the TRS-80 really isn't such a bad idea, but you'd need /really/ high access on aLTER rEALITY to be able to connect with the mainframe... =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: New Files! Date & Time: 11/16/89 03:37:21 Message Number 307 The Library has expanded again, with three new and amusing text files available for download. Check 'em out! Also, the librarian wishes to express thanks to Rocky for graciously uploading two new picture files in the Ascii Pictures section...Tnx1E+06! =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: Well... Date & Time: 11/16/89 20:47:28 Message Number 308 I hear that this system wouldn't enter messages for the past day or so. If that happened to anybody, please leave me mail and describe what happened...it seens to be OK now, though... =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: MSTF meeting Date & Time: 11/17/89 01:24:09 Message Number 309 Ha! just as I suspected...you have no doubt been engaged in subservent activities. Maybe even subversive...or is it servile? =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: Well... Date & Time: 11/17/89 01:27:40 Message Number 310 Could this be the real meaning of "The Silent Majority"? =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: HER Date & Time: 11/17/89 01:29:39 Message Number 311 The bitch has like, 11 million readers. I figure I can collectively piss off a larger crowd than say - JerrY Falwell's group. Besides, she's such an inviting target, with her endless pontifications on everything from the correct way to give Head to squirrels to forming posses in New Mexico suburban towns. =========== From: SAURON To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: HER Date & Time: 11/17/89 01:33:46 Message Number 312 Am I scenting the old 'taste of his own medicine' syndrome here? =========== From: SAURON To: ONYOURSELF Subject: wam Date & Time: 11/17/89 01:36:07 Message Number 313 My...how curious. =========== From: SAURON To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: capitals Date & Time: 11/17/89 01:36:48 Message Number 314 I used the Capital once...for a urinal. I'd been drinking this cheap wine, see, and I was hitchhiking through D.C. and... =========== From: SAURON To: RENFIELD Subject: BLB Date & Time: 11/17/89 01:39:13 Message Number 315 I wish someone would revive "Big Little Books" Huh? You ask. I bet Donthen knows of which I speak. As a kid i remember seeing a few and they were old even THEN. =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: Amazing thing Date & Time: 11/17/89 01:42:10 Message Number 316 It's not only "The right thing to do" as ole' Wilfred would say, it's damn near essential. More importantly - it's efficient. =========== From: TURTLE To: SAURON Subject: MSTF meeting Date & Time: 11/17/89 04:00:30 Message Number 317 Me? Subversive? Not recently. (I have been seen comparing Dan Quayle to a potato in public, though). I suspect the sole reason my phone has been tapped is that I run a bulletin board system...no doubt somebody somewhere thinks I'm operating a phreakers or hackers system or some such rot. (Or it's kosher in Florida to tap BBS's for the hell of it...which wouldn't really surprise me; Florida is one of the strictest states in the country when it comes to bulletin board regulation. There's a list of laws as long as your arm concerning how you can and can't run a BBS in this country, and they all end with things like "Failure to comply with this law may result in a 10-year prison sentence and a $25,000 fine.") Anyway, it's a fairly annoying state of affairs; I was one UNHAPPY reptile when I verified that my phone is indeed being monitored. =========== From: TURTLE To: SAURON Subject: Well... Date & Time: 11/17/89 04:05:58 Message Number 318 % Reply Lost =========== From: TURTLE To: SAURON Subject: Amazing thing Date & Time: 11/17/89 04:08:22 Message Number 319 I am always so amazed when people who use disposable diapers, disposable silverware, disposable pens, disposable flashlights, and disposable cameras band together to protest a new landfill somebody wants to put in their town...you have to wonder what they're using for brains. I'd /really/ like to talk to some of these people sometime: "Yo, Sparky! Get over here! Now listen up. You don't want garbage in your town, huh? Would you prefer it in your front yard maybe? Hmm? You know those guys who remove it from your yard? You know...the big, sweaty men who drive up at 4 AM, scare the cat, and wake the children. Yeah, them...they don't just make the trash go away, you know. They, like, /take it somewhere./ Really! And that somewhere is lookin' pretty full. So Unless you wanna eat this hear pile of garbage, I suggest you either stop makin' so much of it or stop bitchin' cause there ain't nowhere else to put it..." =========== From: DONTHEN To: SAURON Subject: BLB Date & Time: 11/17/89 07:37:22 Message Number 322 Actually, I think they're still around, but I'm not sure. Somebody is bringing back Classics Illustrated in January. I've always thought that was a slightly loony idea, especially when people try to use the comic version as illustrated Cliffs' Notes, but then again, they've got Gahan Wilson doing an adaptation of "The Raven" by Poe.... =========== From: DONTHEN To: TURTLE Subject: Well... Date & Time: 11/17/89 07:39:53 Message Number 323 > % Reply Lost. Nice try. =========== From: DONTHEN To: ALL Subject: Wyvern's Den Date & Time: 11/17/89 07:40:48 Message Number 324 The Wyvern's Den is back online with absolutely no messages. Storyboard messages are... kinda saved. Sorta. Maybe. Some of them. A few. Without headers. In the wrong order. Fun fun fun. At any rate, anybody who remembers where we were in the storyboard is free to pick up where we left off; in fact, sometime today (around 3:00 pm) I'll post a "brief summary" of what was going on before the crash. This will also help the new, confused users we've been having figure out what's going on. =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: MSTF meeting Date & Time: 11/17/89 09:19:11 Message Number 325 Two questions: 1) Where can one get a list of the BBS laws and regulations? 2) How did you determine that your line is tapped? =========== From: TURTLE To: RUFUS Subject: BBS stuff Date & Time: 11/17/89 17:56:07 Message Number 329 Two answers: 1) I imagine the BBS laws are available at any city records office; I /believe/ that is where one picks up copies of state laws. 2) Well, I suspected my phone was being tapped when I lost a dial tone one morning at 3 AM but still had voltage on the line; that simply doesn't happen. So Bart Fox was kind enough to play around with it for a bit, and coerced it into producing a funny tone that indicated the line was indeed tapped...with a tap that resonates at the frequency I was hearing. Since then I have been plagued by "double-clicks" (a sound like an extension being picked up, sort of) every now and then when I place a call, and other minor bits of randomness that annoy me no end. =========== From: TURTLE To: DONTHEN Subject: Wyvern's Den Date & Time: 11/17/89 18:00:43 Message Number 330 Your misfortunes have given me the impetus to grit my teeth and start making regular weekly backups of the entire bulletin board. Backed /everything/ up last night. Isn't it nice to know that others can profit from your tales of grief? =========== From: CORWYN OF AMBER To: TURTLE Subject: PDP... Date & Time: 11/17/89 20:45:26 Message Number 331 What does the PDP use for input/output does it have anything so mundane as some type of serial port? How do yyou print from the sucker? Oh, what can it do, I mean in terms of processing...... Do you REALLY know what it does against a 486 running M(u)S(h)-Dos? By the way I found the most important attribute of a rat (mouse): They're great for playing Arka- noid. Off to my Lots of Silly Parenthesis... - Corwyn =========== From: CORWYN OF AMBER To: SAURON Subject: BLB Date & Time: 11/17/89 20:52:09 Message Number 332 I still have about four or five of those stashed away at home. They range from Bugs Bunny to Mickey Mouse to Spider Man. One of them I'm not sure which, is missing the great little flip-it cartoons... Makes it a lot less fun to re-read... But they're still on my summer's re-reading list... Although down a few.... - Corwyn =========== From: YNGLING To: BARTHOLOMEW FOX Subject: Say what? Date & Time: 11/17/89 22:25:45 Message Number 333 This is a reply to a message you left for me on 11/04 which implied that I didnt read the logon or else I wouldve known why I was dropped from the user files (at least I THINK thats what you were implying) - well, its been a while but to the best of my knowledge there was no logon msg. to that effect when I logged on. But I certainly did appreciate your facetiousness...really made my day...brought back fond memories of an early morning in Michigan when I discovered the nine millimeter/ steel jacketed solution to the critter that was killing our chickens..... =========== From: YNGLING To: CORWYN OF AMBER Subject: BLB Date & Time: 11/17/89 22:41:20 Message Number 334 Corwyn, you are obviously a man of few words (or was that a pause for dramatic effect?). =========== From: TURTLE To: CORWYN OF AMBER Subject: PDP... Date & Time: 11/19/89 05:14:11 Message Number 335 Well, it uses serial ports for the terminals, and special controllers for any mass storage devices it may have. It also has a 9600-baud 132-column line printer that uses a funky 50-pin connector...Its speed against a PC would depend heavily on what kind of job it was doing and how many active terminals it was keeping track of. (Under RSX/11M, the thing is capable of running 128 jobs simultaneously!) It'd be real hard to run the Norton benchmark program on it, though... =========== From: TURTLE To: YNGLING Subject: Say what? Date & Time: 11/19/89 05:16:54 Message Number 336 Well, the logon screen (which I changed before you saw it) was along the lines of "Due to a catastrophic error involving a rubber band, three exotic dancers, and Chip P. Unicorn, the userlog has been totally wiped out. If you haven't called recently, please re-register." Chip did a number on my userlog...he tried to log on, and it went away. Such is life. =========== From: TURTLE To: YNGLING Subject: BLB Date & Time: 11/19/89 05:18:39 Message Number 337 You never saw Corwyn's message...and until 5 minutes ago, neither did I or anyone else. I had a small problem with the message base yesterday; all messages posted on 11/17 and 11/18 were saved correctly but with an end-of-text marker as the very first character in the actual message. So I just spent 45 minutes fixing the problem; I hope it doesn't recur... Apologies to anyone who was inconvenienced. --An annoyed Turtle =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/19/89 05:20:57 Message Number 338 There is now a Local BBS list available in the [I]nformation area on the [S]how neat stuff menu. This list has been updated effective today, and is believed to be accurate. Your help is appreciated in maintaining it...if you know of any new BBSes going up in the area, or any on the list that have gone down, drop me a line. This same list is also available for downloading from the Wyvern's Den...you know, that "other" MSTF PBBS system. Thank you for your support. --A devoted-to-public-service Turtle =========== From: CHARLES DITTELL To: TURTLE Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/19/89 13:29:06 Message Number 339 Hey, have you gone 'regular'?? A BBS list...just a plain 'ol bbs list? Why not a "secret bbs list"...with numbers of the bbs's randomly assigned? Makes for some creative work on the callers' part...just give a few hints, as: one of the Sarsota boards whose sysop's name rhymes with the name of a large African animal has a phone number with 2 "3's" in it.... =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: BBS stuff Date & Time: 11/19/89 18:43:18 Message Number 341 Thank you for both answers. Ribbit... =========== From: RUFUS To: CORWYN OF AMBER Subject: BLB Date & Time: 11/19/89 18:44:29 Message Number 342 I have a BLB of Mickey Mouse visits the really small people or something like that. But it doesn't have those flip-it cartoons in the corner. =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/19/89 18:46:47 Message Number 343 Speaking of MSTF, when do I get the application form that is supposedly around somewhere?? People call up and laugh, and say "This isn't an MST ( + F ) system. HAHAHA" =========== From: TURTLE To: CHARLES DITTELL Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/20/89 02:54:27 Message Number 349 Hmm...Gazelle...Dittell...Gazelle...naah. Anyway, yes, it's true (*gasp*); aLTER rEALITY has gone (*sob!*) normal. I'll be putting the Lotus 1-2-3 discussion areas and the MS-DOS download directories (filled with all the latest archiving programs: ARC, LHARC, PKARC, PKPAK, PKZIP, PKCHOKE, PKPUKE, and PKDIE) in the next few days or so. In fact, I might even spell this board's name in a conventional fashion soon, register for the Republican party, and buy a Ford Tempo in the near future. --A reformed Turtle =========== From: TURTLE To: RUFUS Subject: BLB Date & Time: 11/20/89 02:58:53 Message Number 350 I had a neat-O book once (not a Big Little Book) about Porky Pig and Bugs Bunny flying to the North Pole, getting involved in a plane wreck, and finding an underground civilization where everyone used gold for EVERYTHING. The book was about 4" by 5" and about 3" thick...it only had maybe 50 words printed on each page. The most remarkable thing about it was this really amazing flip-it cartoon in the corner..since the book was pretty near a thousand pages, it was a /long/ cartoon (even flipping at top speed). Can't remember what it was called or where it disappeared to; that was a /long/ time ago. --A literate Turtle =========== From: TURTLE To: RUFUS Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/20/89 03:02:20 Message Number 351 You'll be getting one soon. Bart Fox has graciously volunteered to /personally/ sponsor your board... (Now BE HONORED!) --A Most Significant Time-travelling Turtle (Be forewarned...the sucker is 10 pages long. I have one sitting next to me right now.) =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: wam Date & Time: 11/20/89 13:35:11 Message Number 352 Yes, but smallcaps give a sense of insecurity, as if one wishes to retreat into ones shell (no offense, Turtle), while writing in all capitals gives the impression of one trying to bulldoze through life without waiting for other people's feelings. The proper mixture of the two implies a healthy mind, devoid of either inferiority or superiority complexes (which, of course, are the same thing.) Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: MSTF meeting Date & Time: 11/20/89 13:42:05 Message Number 353 Personally, I believe those who are tapping your board should log on, just for the heck of it. They've already seen that this board is not a phreaker's board. Yes, it's a hacker's board -- in the old sense of the word. We're not interested in destroying other computer systems; our technical talks have been about building new systems (or improving old ones...) Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: Well... Date & Time: 11/20/89 13:44:17 Message Number 354 % Reply to Reply Lost =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: DONTHEN Subject: BLB Date & Time: 11/20/89 13:45:25 Message Number 355 Don't tell you-know-who about that adaptation! He'll buy them all up... Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/20/89 13:52:19 Message Number 356 aLTER rEALITY has gone normal? Mythological beasties can't prance around the board any more Turtle plans on joining the Republican Party, wearing business suits (or Izod's in his leisure time), have 2.3 kiddies, and go out to the Polo matches every weekend? The people on this board are becoming Yuppies?!? No! I can't stand it! the disenchanted Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: LORELEI To: ALL Subject: DOLPHINS Date & Time: 11/20/89 14:50:03 Message Number 357 Does anyone out there know for certain whether dolphin red blood cells have a nucleus? If you do, please respond and note your reference source. The reason for this request is for a research project (so far, Mote Marine Lab and The Dolphin Research Center disagree on the answer). =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/20/89 17:05:59 Message Number 358 Wow! Spiffy, gee walekers...yippie yelp kiwi nose! Hey, I'm talking to Bart now. Spiffy wows keen....10 pages...yippie.... =========== From: BENN To: SALOONERS Subject: Benn & co. Date & Time: 11/20/89 17:43:16 Message Number 360 The light from the doorway is now blocked by a large bear, and four smaller bears, two of them wait outside, near the door. The large bear spots Stripe and his hand edges closer to one of his guns. the two brown bears sit at the bar, facing Stripe. Enter Benn, loan bear, extortionist , murderer, stagecoach hiester. He runs the illegal outfits in town, prostitution, casino rigging.. from his own little casino on the outside of town. His hoods 'convince' people they should stop at his casino... (The authorities haven't been able to connect him to these crimes... this echoes an old west 'morph Al Copone huh? haha) He approaches Butch and drops some money onto the piano,and noone hears their conversation about the stagecoach hitting town soon... -------- by the way, Benn has more than just a passing fancy for Sable's daughter .... Another brilliant plot development by: Spellwind =========== From: CORWYN OF AMBER To: YNGLING Subject: Words Date & Time: 11/20/89 18:30:55 Message Number 361 Somehow I managed to let the editor eat my last lines. I'm one of those people who have been spoiled by full screen ansi editors. Hopefully I can manage to send this message complete but who knows? If it doesn't make sense I probably wrote it that way, If it does look for missing non-sensical sentences..... - Corwyn =========== From: CORWYN OF AMBER To: RUFUS Subject: BLB Date & Time: 11/20/89 18:33:47 Message Number 362 Ya, that's one of the one's that I have... the little people have an Island that's solid gold. Great book, but I guess that's the one that doesn't have flip-it cartoons. They should have made them mandatory in BLB's they just aren't the same without them. - Corwyn =========== From: DONTHEN To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/20/89 18:41:11 Message Number 363 No, not yuppies, PREPPIES. Donthen now smokes Izod cigars. =========== From: CYBERPUNK To: ANYONE Subject: next conv. Date & Time: 11/20/89 20:09:32 Message Number 365 hey all, anyone know when the next comic convention will be held? i mean one that will be in close vacinity, like, Tampa? and if any of you guys know anyone that have any of the episodes of ROBOTECH any of the 3 generations on video, thanks!! *Cy* =========== From: TURTLE To: ALL Subject: RufusCon '89 Date & Time: 11/20/89 23:03:49 Message Number 366 RufusCon '89 is upon us!!! Announcing: T h e f i r s t a n n u a l R u f u s C o n ! ! ! When: Saturday, November 26, 1989, from 5 PM to ??? Where: Turtle's house (leave E-mail to Turtle for directions if you're confused.) Why: for fun! Schedule of events: Rufus Party, Furry Party, Synchronized Jumping, Rufus Look-Alike Contest, Juggling Foxes, and /really/ bad movies... =========== From: SPELLWIND To: TURTLE Subject: That lidl hous? Date & Time: 11/21/89 15:11:36 Message Number 367 Thats house is a bit small for a big thing like this! you'll hafta move the table outside or something! =========== From: SPELLWIND To: LORELEI Subject: DOLPHINS Date & Time: 11/21/89 15:50:49 Message Number 368 WHAT?!? =========== From: ANGEL To: TURTLE Subject: PDP... Date & Time: 11/22/89 00:31:52 Message Number 370 Ya, under RSX/11M the PDP /CAN/ run a kazillion jobs at once, but at work we've found a mere dozen will bring it to its knees, especially if one task is doing heavy I/O. It's an extremely slow machine in practice though it benchmarks well. =========== From: TURTLE To: ANGEL Subject: PDP... Date & Time: 11/22/89 03:53:01 Message Number 372 Reminds me of this Cyber 760 I had the misfortune to use for a time. Its greatest claim to fame was the ability to run 90 terminals at once, each of them doing several jobs; but when more than about 10 people were logged on it got r e a l s l o w. Took me 15 minutes just to log on once...no exaggeration, I timed it. And NOS has got to be the most pathetic O/S I've ever seen...it doesn't even know XON-XOFF. Just keeps sending "Please Wait" when it wants you to slow down, and ignores any ^S characters in its input stream. (Yeech! Hate it hate it hate it.) NOS starts thrashing at right around 8 jobs... =========== From: TURTLE To: BENN Subject: Benn & co. Date & Time: 11/22/89 03:57:00 Message Number 373 Stripe looks up as the bear enters the tavern, with a decidedly ugly expression. "You get out of this tavern right now," he says very, very quietly through gritted teeth, rising slowly from the bar. "I am in no mood to deal with you or your cronies, and I WILL NOT have you causing problems in my town. Especially not today. I'm going to be real friendly and give you fair warning...if you want to keep your mangy, flea-ridden body in one piece, take it out of my sight before it gets damaged." His conversation with Talon seems to have faded into the background as the raccoon glares at the bear with a go-ahead-make-my-day look. =========== From: BENN To: STRIPE Subject: * Date & Time: 11/22/89 04:26:45 Message Number 374 "Louie, Emilio, go get the others," Benn says. He beckons the others into the room and whispers in their ears. They walk in and then slowly pace to the other side of the room. Louie and Emilio enter with a weasel and a fox, with drawn rifles. " I don't want no trouble either M7friend, heh, I ain't done nothin' to provoke you, just wanted to get a drink and play some poker, how about it sheriff, 5 card for drinks? I don't cheat, I don't want no trouble with you, so take it easy.." he says to Stripe. He whispers something to Butch, who sticks a harmonica in his mouth (moves it with his lips y'know) and starts to play... =========== From: BENN To: BENN Subject: * Date & Time: 11/22/89 04:35:20 Message Number 375 ...starts to play Piano Man... =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: RUFUS Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/22/89 11:51:23 Message Number 376 There are really two forms, both of which (I think) must be filled out -- total of thirteen pages. Pleasant working! Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: DONTHEN Subject: Izod cigars Date & Time: 11/22/89 11:53:02 Message Number 377 Yeah, but do they have tobacco leaves the shapes of little alligators? Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: TURTLE Subject: PDP... Date & Time: 11/22/89 11:54:59 Message Number 378 Yeah, but at least the PDP just fit in my station wagon. Chip P. Unicorn =========== From: CHIP P. UNICORN To: Y'ALL Subject: Croc Roc' Date & Time: 11/22/89 11:56:52 Message Number 379 Seeing Benn, Emilio, and Louie enter the bar, Roc' decided that was the best place to be. He dropped his cigarette, stomped it out, and entered the bar. The four were sitting down around a table, with Stripe looking uncomfortably surrounded. Heck -- Stripe might be the best shot in town, but anyone can be out-shot when it's three against one. When Ben pulled out a deck of cards, Roc' pulled up a chair between Stripe and Louie. "Deal me in," he says. Stripe glares at Roc', but says nothing. =========== From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX To: RUFUS Subject: Fox & the Hound Date & Time: 11/22/89 22:18:13 Message Number 380 Arf! By the way, it looks like I won't be able to bring that to RufusCon '89. (grumble) =========== From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX To: YNGLING Subject: Say what? Date & Time: 11/22/89 22:26:32 Message Number 381 Arf! (I'd have a better reply if I knew what the heck you were talking about... but...) =========== From: BARTHOLOMEW FOX To: TURTLE Subject: Fweep... fweep Date & Time: 11/22/89 22:34:48 Message Number 382 Arf! ArroooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOooOOoOOOOOoOOoOOoOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! And so on. No Fox+Hund... no Fantasia... maybe even no GBBS v1.3j (the DWEEB didn't bother to get it for me... AUGH!). Grumble. Anyway... I "just" got off of Zero where a couple of "official"-ish references to the MSTF should scare any potential geek board... or make it curious enought to send in the $4 application fee... (grin) Ahem. Anyway, I'm gonna go bye-bye now... I smashed my thumb and it hurts. Oh, perchance did you notice I'm incoherent? Yes? Good. Oh, that reminds me... did you hafta take something known as CLAST? some sorta exam from The Evil State? Just curious. Gimme call. I'll be visiting soon. We'll all meet at Le Croissant for dinner on Friday, neh? Yeah... someting like that... if I'm able to show up that soon. AUGH! Fun day. Later... -- Bartholomew Fox (04) (different entity from Bill Biersdorf, 25) =========== From: RUFUS To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/23/89 08:09:32 Message Number 383 Great, there's another thing I have to do before I die, boy, this'll go right under "Find out what that stuff in a Twinkie is." "Find person who made MSTF form and beat senseless." =========== From: DONTHEN To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: Izod cigars Date & Time: 11/23/89 13:15:21 Message Number 384 No, they have little alligators on the wrapping. =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: MSTF meeting Date & Time: 11/24/89 00:07:21 Message Number 385 How'd you go about verifying that?....if you can say openly. =========== From: SAURON To: CHARLES DITTELL Subject: Umgawa Date & Time: 11/24/89 00:11:49 Message Number 386 Hey Charles, how the hell are you? =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/24/89 00:13:42 Message Number 387 Sure you will...when Hell freezes over. Or when intelligent life is discovered in 'Suncoast Gossip' - whichever comes first. =========== From: SAURON To: CHIP P. UNICORN Subject: yuppies Date & Time: 11/24/89 00:16:45 Message Number 388 Spontaneous thought: A yuppie is nothing more than a guppy that has dropped the "Gee" and substituted "Why" ...nahhhh! =========== From: SAURON To: LORELEI Subject: DOLPHINS Date & Time: 11/24/89 00:19:04 Message Number 389 I should think the answer to this dilemma could be found in either of two ways: 1. Ask Don Shula 2. Obtain an inexpensive microscope and examine one. (sorry - just in a silly mood) =========== From: SAURON To: DONTHEN Subject: BLB Date & Time: 11/24/89 00:24:27 Message Number 390 Classics coming back? God, I never knew the'd gone away. I hated em' as a kid, but wouldbe mildly interested to see how they would in a more contemporary motiff. =========== From: SAURON To: CORWYN OF AMBER Subject: BLB Date & Time: 11/24/89 00:27:23 Message Number 391 Spiderman...that tells me they must be of much later vintage than the ones I remember seeing with 40's and early 50's copyrights. (they were, if memory serves - .15 cents) =========== From: SAURON To: TURTLE Subject: text things Date & Time: 11/24/89 00:30:54 Message Number 392 To digress; another neat thing about 40's comics were those neat one page text inserts a lot of them had. A mini story-no pictures sandwiched between two normal stories. One of remembered favoriteswas a clown called Jon Jarl. ( of the Space Patrol - I shit you not ) who was featured in every issue of PLANET comics. Sometimes his tales kind of interspersed with the flagship story of PLANET, which was 'The Lost World' a pretty damn good story, conside -ring how long ago it was written. =========== From: SAURON To: ALL Subject: oops Date & Time: 11/24/89 00:39:57 Message Number 393 Sorry about the sloppiness in the last 2 messages I posted. Between a sticky spacebar and being saturated with both Butterball and Jack Daniels... =========== From: TURTLE To: RUFUS Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/24/89 03:56:51 Message Number 394 Find person who made MSTF form and beat senseless?? Bart Fox and I made that form, in a massive brainstorming session that lasted until 6 AM last time he was down! And if you beat us senseless, we'll have to hold RufusCon in the hospital... =========== From: RUFUS To: TURTLE Subject: New additions Date & Time: 11/24/89 14:55:00 Message Number 396 O.K. I'll shave the fox senseless, and leave it at that. I really hate forms, any kind..and well....err, I forgot what I was going to say. =========== From: TURTLE To: SAURON Subject: MSTF phones Date & Time: 11/24/89 15:03:32 Message Number 397 >How'd you go about verifying that? Well, it helped that I was actually on the phone when they tapped it (at about 3 AM, no less); anyway, Bartholomew Fox was kind enough to come down a few days later and play around with the telephone until he got the tapping equipment to get annoyed and start whining (loudly, I might add) into the phone... =========== From: TURTLE To: SAURON Subject: oops Date & Time: 11/24/89 15:09:43 Message Number 398 >Between a sticky spacebar and being saturated with both Butterball >and Jack Daniels... Are these two things perhaps causally connected? (Never drink and BBS... it's real bad for the computer...) Anyway, hope you (and everyone else on the board) had a good Thanksgiving. =========== From: CHARLES DITTELL To: TURTLE Subject: OMIGODNO! Date & Time: 11/24/89 17:27:42 Message Number 400 Don't do it!! Stay pure, and true to your lifegoals! Nothing that copies whatever's out there....how about new settings, as: 1855 baud, 5N3...SolarNet...Pl{anetary Echomail....etc... ===========