.----------------------------------------------------------------------------. | ___________ __________ | | | |_____| \ | | | . | | . | | | | :_____| ____| | | | | | | ___|_ : | | | |_____| o |_o________/ o | | |____________| | | | | Really ELiTE Doodz Prezent : | | RED-020.TXT aka | | "Stupidity for the Masses #1" | | By : Black Francis | : "Better Living Through Stupidity." : . . WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ! Listen up, pansy! There's a time to fuck around and there's a time to buckle down at get serious. We've been fucking around long enough here at ReD magazine, and now we're starting to get serious. We need to set a direction for ourselves, and that's what we're doing. After this issue, ReD is making a few changes. For one, we will be changing our format to a more 'zine-like format. This means - more articles per issue. This may or may not slow down the production of the magazine, we have yet to find out. We are also changing our name to better suit the new format. The new name will be "Poop Enlightment 'Zine." Hey, if it has the word "poop" in it - it can't be all that bad. Can it? Anyway, this issue will be a small one. This issue we will give a member listing and a ReD index. Our new format will begin next issue which will be PeZ issue #21 - continuing right where ReD left off. Hope you pick it up and enjoy it. Also, ReD/PeZ Whq is up! All distro. site sysops are required to call. The name is Goat Blowers Anonymous and the number is (215)750-0392. This is also where you can upload your writer/distro. site apps. - bf WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ! Really Elite Member Listing : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Head Honcho : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Black Francis The Writers : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Black Francis, Archangel, Satan, Intestinal Scum-Monkey, Mogel, Logik, Leper Messiah, Stinky, Dead Cheese Offical World Headquarters : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Goat Blowers Anonymous @ (215)750-0392 Official Mascot : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Godd(+dd) Official Saying : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I got me a car, it's as big as a whale!" WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ! Really Elite Index: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ /----------------------------------------------------------------------------\ | No. Title Author | |----------------------------------------------------------------------------| | [001] The Plot to Kill Good Music Black Francis | | [002] Why I Started Such an Elite Group Black Francis | | [003] Them Damn Mentos Commercials! Black Francis | | [03«] Them Damn Mentos Commercials! Part 2 Black Francis | | [004] Poetry Flambe Satan | | [005] Bastard Archangel | | [006] Teen Agnst for Fun and Profit Black Francis | | [007] Stories Du Jour Satan | | [008] Fun With Drive-Thru Windows Intestinal Scum-Monkey | | [009] The Devils Song : A Poem Archangel | | [010] Letters to the Editor #1 Black Francis | | [011] .. And Now For Something Completely Random Mogel | | [012] You're a Pathetic Loser Black Francis | | [013] Doughboy RISE!! Black Francis | | [014] How to Break Stuff Intestinal Scum-Monkey | | [015] ReD Frequently Asked Questions Black Francis | | [016] Leper Messiahs Poetry Corner Leper Messiah | | [017] The Really Elite Experiment Black Francis | | [018] pHuN 4t tH3 z00! Stinky | | [019] a gNu tYp3 0f b0x! Black Francis | | [020] Stupidity For the Masses #1 Black Francis | \----------------------------------------------------------------------------/ WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ!WaReZ! /----------------------------------------------------------------------------\ | )_) rED iZ iN dA hOUSE! wERD 'eM uP! (_( | | ((______/ ..\ pHOR tHE lATEST pHAT-aZZ rED pHILEZ, kALL /.. \______)) | | | /--( gOAT bLOWERZ aNONYMOUZ @ (215)750-0392 )--\ | | | |||---||| "aDMITTING yOU hAVE a pROBLEM iS tHE fIRST |||---||| | | M M M M sTEP tO rECOVERY." M M M M | \----------------------------------------------------------------------------/ ( all rights reserved, but two wrongs don't make a right )