[--------------------------------------------------------------------------] ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #587 `888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8 888 888 888 888 888 "Dear You" 888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8 888 888 888 888 888 " by Mutter 888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 4/21/99 o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8 [--------------------------------------------------------------------------] It's just cold enough outside for no one in their right mind to be sitting on a park bench at midnight smoking a cigarette -- I'm sitting on a park bench at midnight smoking a cigarette. Dear You, it's almost over now. When it's time to say goodbye I'll be as introverted and anti-social as I was at the beginning. Only difference is before it was because I didn't know anyone and now it's because I know everyone too well. A one-way road generally leads nowhere I want to go. I'm sorry you won't be meeting me halfway. Maybe some other day. I do wish the best for everyone I know. I feel everyone I've met in the last year will find their own paths (even if I don't agree with them) Like I've always told you, I don't judge -- but that's probably the biggest lie I tell to myself. My second biggest lie is that I'm not an angry hypocrite. Today my horoscope said, "You've been known to be brassy and bold, and maybe even speak out of turn, and that has sometimes gotten you into trouble..." This is the first time I actually read my horoscope and gave astrology a double-take. I guess that's the best way I can describe what happened. A second of overwhelming emotion, a nervous blurt of words... spoken "out of turn" -- when I had no place to say anything. (Damn, I really can't see shit without my glasses but maybe that's because there's nothing but shit to see.) "Today, just the opposite is more likely. By saying it the way you see it, with accuracy and honesty, you're more likely to get a promotion..." it went on. So that's it, I guess. In the end I'll be changed but more the same than I thought I would be. I'm really sorry if I made things weirder than they usually are and more awkward (if there's one word I'd use to describe my world it would be "awkward"). What can I say? My heart still aches more than my half-sunburned body. I wish I was Superman so I could turn back time, but I'm not... I'm hardly even Clark Kent. So, the globe still spins and so will my room when I get too drunk to stand. Oh well. - C I found contentment just for a second (the wronger find it for even longer) It has occurred to me that the most powerful phrase in the English language is "I love you." People endow words with power and it seems no set of words are given more power than those. They are the essence of magic. Spoken, they can yield powerful... dare I say almost dangerous results. The weak have no business with them. Spoken, they can instantly turn the world around you into heaven-on-earth or the deepest pits of hell. Speaking the phrase is always a gamble. And, like in any other form of gambling, there are those who choose not to play... those who are not willing to risk... those who would rather sit by and watch others win than risk the hell that losing would bring. They are the cowards, and I am "they." So, spin that wheel, put your chips on black, and I'll hope the ball doesn't land on red. It's just cold enough outside for no one in their right mind to be sitting on a park bench at midnight smoking a cigarette... [--------------------------------------------------------------------------] [ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #587 - WRITTEN BY: MUTTER - 4/21/99 ]