'##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!! ##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: =========================================== ##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #374 !! #########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS! !! ##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: =========================================== ##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "Jesse's Self-destructive Methods" !! ##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> The Jester !! ..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 12/22/98 !! !!========================================================================!! he blinked slowly as he got into the car. he turned it on and gave one last look back at he house. the lights were all out except one. hers. the saddest single light in the known world at the time. it was saying, go, just from the looks of it. he slowly drove around the neighborhood. he was thinking back at all the times he had spent with her. even as a friend, he felt as if there was something more, but he never knew. dana had been his only source of feelings for so long. he was numbed from a life of change and, although she caused pain as well as joy, it was better than apathy. he remembered when his ex-girlfriend, staring at her, then staring at dana. it was a worthless relationship that ended by his leaving for escape of boredom. as was the case quite often. but dana was different. her seemingly coolness to him was better than any adoration of another girl. it provided him with feelings unknown to him. his friends told him she wasn't in love with him. he knew, and didn't care. he'd rather be despised by her than loved by someone who cared. "hate is the cure of my pains," he rationalized "because i am so tolerant to all forms of love. my joy comes only in self-destructive forms because i am in love with something i don't relate to." he experience moments of self realization. he understood that his one true love was the person he hadn't spoken to in years. "lauren," he felt himself cheering up, "i have to go see lauren." as he accelerated at improper speeds he found his mind open up and he was in a world he hadn't known for years. lauren. the word brought him comfort in and of itself. "one right, a left, 2 rights, and a left.. ok." he was suprisingly comfortable, whereas he normally had no composure at all. he had no anxiety and the world was clear. he understood. he parallel parked got out of the car and knocked on the door. "hello?" "lauren?" "yes?" "its jesse." "oh, wow, hold on a second, let me unlock the door." as she unlocked the door he finally felt the nervousness kick in, and he felt the urge to go run away, but he stood there and awaited her. "how have you been?" she asked, in his opinion, too formally. "good, and you?" "great! have you talked to anyone from school lately?" as he shrugged, he said "eh, well, a few people. actually, i came over because i had to tell you something." she was utterly confused, and silent, so he continued. "although we really haven't been in touch the past couple years, i have missed you an incredible ammount and, well ...." she just stared. "i think i lo--" "stop. i know what you are going to say." it was his turn to stare. "i think i want to get to know you again." "not exactly the answer i was looking for, but ok," he thought to himself. he smiled. "i have been wanting to tell you that for so long. so you want to go out... when?" he didn't want to seem too pushy. "how about next friday?" "sure, give me a call. here's my number. i'll talk to you soon." she gave him a slight kiss on the cheek and said bye, and went back inside. as he drove away happy, she went inside sad. she knew what had been going on in his life, and just felt a little pity for him, but she knew. she blinked slowly as she went inside. !!========================================================================!! !! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! #374 - WRITTEN BY: THE JESTER - 12/22/98 !!