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                            >> "Ode to Yak Boy" <<
                             by -> Captain Bovine

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 Oh yak boy, oh yak boy
 In your pastures of green,
 Oh yak boy, oh yak boy
 Why are you so mean?

 You sit and taunt
 The sheep grazing below.
 They want your pasture
 But you yell at them "No!"

 It's the yaks that you love
 Those big hairy beasts.
 Their fur keeps you warm,
 On their meat you do feast.

 All day long
 You sit in the sun
 Knowing nothing of freedom,
 Knowing nothing of fun.

 At night you go home
 To lie on your back.
 You have your bed of nails,
 And your dreams of yaks
 
 If in the night
 Impure thoughts should appear
 You may wake up screaming,
 Trembling with fear!

 Yaks are for raising!
 Silly boy of Tibet
 You won't reach nirvana
 If you're thinking of sex.

 Until now you were safe
 Making your babies,
 You were feared only the weather
 (and mad yaks with rabies).

 But now there's a threat
 Coming over the mountains
 Tearing down your homes,
 Destroying your fountains.

 With tanks they come
 Big, fearsome and grey.
 You are about to face
 The cruel PLA.

 You have no swords or guns
 To fend off their attacks.
 But you MUST do something!
 Who'll save the yaks?!

 You'll have to defend yourself!
 (They could bring in cows!!!!)
 You'll have to give up
 Your pacifistic vows.

 What hope do you have
 If you won't fight back?
 It's time to be brave
 And let loose the yaks.
 
 With the yaks as the fighters
 And you as the brains,
 You'll trample your enemies
 And derain their trains!

 With the yaks fighting
 There'll be no need to run
 The power of a yak
 Can beat any PLA gun.

 There's no need to worry
 The Chinese will have to retreat!
 Then you can get back
 To slaughtering yaks for meat.

 And you can go back
 To tending your heard
 Because fighting and violence
 Is so damn absurd.

 And so you will live
 From boyhood to man
 Just wait a few years
 And you'll be attacked once again.

 ---

        (Incase you don't know... the PLA is the chinese military.. they have
 been doing all sorts of nasty stuff to the tibetans, because they want to
 take control of the area in the mountains... lala)

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 * (c) HoE publications.  HoE #204 -- written by Captain Bovine -- 3/06/98 *