$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$ hogz of entropy #142 $$$$$P $$$$ $$$$ moo, oink, up your butt. $$$$P $$$$ x$$$$ $$$P $$$$ xP$$$$ d$$$$$$$$$$$. $$$. $$$$xP $$$$ $$$$$$' >$$$$ $$$$$$$$$. $$$$P $$$$ 4$$$$$. .$$$$' $$$$'`4$$$b. $$$$ $$$$ 4$$$$$$$$$P' $$$$b 4$$$$b. $$$$$$$$$$$ 4$$$< %% $$$$$b 4$$$$$x $$$$$$$$$$$ 4$$$$$$$$$ %% >> "Are You Calling Me A Liar?" << by -> Trilobyte ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- From: tril@dto.net To: ???@???.??? Date: Tue, 26 Aug 1997 16:54:33 -0600 X-Mailer: YAM 1.3.4 - Amiga Mailer by Marcel Beck Subject: my mother i have come armed with a complete example of why my mother is so stupid. school starts tomorrow. she wants me to go out and get supplies today. my sunbird is in the shop. my buick is missing the rear window, thereby having a large hole in the roof. she is gone with her car, my father is gone with his car. that leaves a scooter/moped and my bicycle. i decide that i will go out in the buick to get school supplies. when i walk outside, i see that it is completely overcast and there are a few low-hanging dark clouds. i, being the aged and wise person that i have grown to be, decided that it looked as if it were about to rain. my mother comes home. "did you do _anything_ you were supposed to?" i told her that i shaved. i was also supposed to call the barber for an appointment, possibly for today, but decided that i had too many things to do today, so i didn't call him. she was not happy about this, and argued that i could fit it in. i said it wasn't important, then she asked later if she should call and make an appointment. "sure. but not for thursday, i'm working then." "thursday?! i'm talking about today!!" "i told you i didn't want an appointment for today." "you never get anything done. bla bla bla bla." so. anyway. i then say that i didn't go out and get supplies because it looked as if it was going to rain. she gets very angry. "WELL. YOU must have been looking THIS MORNING because the sky is perfectly clear and the sun is shining bright. you have NO excuse to have not gone out and gotten school supplies." "my buick has no rear window. if it were to rain --" "if it was going to rain, you wouldn't get that wet. and if you're so concerned about it, why don't you just walk or take your scooter?" i walk upstairs to look outside. it is still completely overcast with little, low-hanging, dark-gray clouds looming. "oh yeah, mom, it's completely sun-shiny and happy. look at this. it's completely overcast. WHY would you LIE about that?" "ARE YOU CALLING ME A LIAR?" "you just completely lied about something pointless to try and prove your non-existant point!" "LISTEN HERE. YOU NEVER EVER CALL ME A LIAR EVER AGAIN. I AM _NOT_ A LIAR. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU WOULD EVEN SAY SUCH A THING." i bought one of those Tyco Lego-phones at the salvation army yesterday. it's rad. i always wanted one when i was a kid. well, sort of. i always preferred cordless phones, so no matter how cool a phone was, if it wasn't cordless, i considered it to be useless. hey hey. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- * (c) HoE publications. HoE #142 -- written by Trilobyte -- 12/9/97 *