------------------------------------------------------------------------------ the _____________ ________ ___ ___ | | | _____ \ | | ___| | ___ |____ ____| | | | | | | |___| | / / | | | |____| | | | ___| |/ / | |________ | _______/ _______ | | | | / _______ | | ____ | | ____ \/ ____\ | | | | \ / ____\ | | | | | | | | | |_____| | | | | |\ \ | |_____| | | |____| | | |____| | |_____ | |_____| | | \ \| |_____ |___|________| |_________/\_______| |________|___|__| \__\________| ___________ _______ _________ _ _________ ___ / ________| / _____\/ \| |/ _____ \| | ___ | | |/ / | ____ \ | / \ | | / / | | | | | | | | | | | | | |/ / | | | | | | | | | | | | | / | | | | | | | | | | | | | \ | |________| | | |____| | | | | | | |\ \ \___________|__| \________/\__|__| |__|__| \__\ newsletter issue one - august 2nd, 1996. oh... to be like crank!@# a BAD production ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- hi, I'm pixy. this is a 'zine idea that i borrowed from black francis. it's about crank and how i want to be like her. oh... to be like crank! ----+--+ crank!@# in bF's i love crank newsletter issue one he stated crank's past with relationships. so many too! with eightball and turbo and dead cheese and aoxomoxoa and murmur and how she went for mogel. but now she's after jamesy. jamesy was my best friend but not anymore because of crank. but i don't blame her. i kick myself everyday because jamesy went for me long ago but i turned him down in respect for his girlfriend rachel. but not crank. if i only knew how she would have handled it. i could have been like her. oh... to be like crank! ----+--+ crank!@# here is a poem someone wrote for the beautiful crank. it's called crank 'n jamesy. "one day she met a guy who blasted her into outer space she cut his hair, made him fly and called him her little 'faceface' he said 'but what will my friends say when they see how i've been whipped?' she said 'don't think about that today just get your pants unzipped'" oh... to be like crank! ----+--+ crank!@# ___ this is me. do i look like crank? i'm trying to, please say i | | look like her. oh, i forgot, no one is allowed to see her |_| pictures, you don't know what she looks like. _|_ | | / \ / \ me trying to look like crank oh... to be like crank! ----+--+ crank!@# here's another poem that that someone wrote. it's called skrank. "she wasn't mean, she wasn't rude but she was quite the skank she like to skr00 with every d00d so they wouldn't have to spank" oh... to be like crank! ----+--+ crank!@# TTTTTT OOOOOO BBBBBBB EEEEEEE HH HH EEEEEEE RRRRRRR !! !! !! TT OO OO BB B EE HH HH EE RR RR !! !! !! TT OO OO BBBBBB EEEEE HHHHHHH EEEEE RRRRRRR !! !! !! TT OO OO BB B EE HH HH EE RR RR TT OOOOOO BBBBBBB EEEEEEE HH HH EEEEEEE RR RR !! !! !! oh... to be like crank! ----+--+ crank!@# i got hair dye today since my hair is blond and crank's isn't. my friend said she can pierce me all over the place. i got an appointment with the tattoo guy next week. by the end of the month my name will be legally changed to alishia. i just hope one day i'll /join #zines and everyone will say "HI CRANK!@#" and it will be for me. oh... to be like crank! ----+--+ crank!@# crank is moving to illinois to go to junior college. she was going to move here for phil but now that she broke up with him she grabbed onto jamesy before she was all alone. what a smart girl! i'm lucky, i already live in illinois, so i don't have to follow her here. i'll be just few hours away from her. i think i will visit her often. i hope i can get a guy or two that's she's thrown away. oh... to be like crank! ----+--+ crank!@# that's it for to be like crank newsletter issue one. idea used with permission from black francis. and maybe you learned a thing or two to be just like crank. issues will follow when i learn new and exciting things about the beautiful the talented crank. the poetry is not my own. it, also, was used by permission. the writer would like to remain anonymous. thank you. --- "to be like crank" newsletter issue one ------------------------------