Just Dial 1010 ATI 220. Issue 220. Just 5 cents a minute for calls over 400 minutes long. PSST!: I'm not letting any of you help me with this week's 'zine. It's called "Operation Team Player." Tax Day cometh soon enough. Are you fully harcourted? braced?? Jovanoviched? ************** ** Hootmon, **- - - - - - - - - - . ************** 220 / / (Yeah, right. Nice Tux) / / / Activist Times, Inc. ATI is a - - journalistic, causistic, / /cyberpolitical / /organization, / 4 more info? /trying to / send SASE's & /help y'all, and us / e-stamps??? change the world / to: radically, in less / ati@etext.org than two minute / increments. / - - - - - - - - - Happy Spring Ahead, Happy Fertility, Happy Easterly wind. And while you're at it you might as well set your clocks - on everything you got that counts - to 1972 See? Voila. Instant y2k compat. Even your toaster! As if. Who bought a toaster with a timer? You, id-i-OT! Did, you, not, know, you can be kicked, out, of Dexter's La-boooor-atoory, for that? Now, I shall have to, disable your timer, so it will be y,2,k comPATible for I do NOT, think you will reMEMber 1971 or 1972. Greedings, phellow shortsighted hu-person beings, it's almost Saturday, March 45th, 2000. In the year of our Arm-a-gettin. Live, from Janet Reno's knickers-drawer in the Lincoln Bedroom it's ATI. hACTIVIST, TURVY & ILLIN' ClipOnToys... ...is this the only reason to buy food? FROM THE PUBLISHER Whutt rrrr yewwwww, ennnnn eeeeeee waaaay... a drawl, by prime anarchist, your purple pilled publisher, [ not brought to you by Prilosec ] George W - Jean or a Khaki? Bush is definitely a 40 long tux pant. Black with the grey stripe. The half inch cuff. Gore? Polyester leisure-suit-pantsuit pant, of course. You know, the kind. That ugly pukish color, not blue, not grey, not really green, but almost... And let's ask a couple hazbns... Clinton? Sweats. You can get out of them quickest. Bill Bradley is def'ly custom-made khakis. No one makes jeans long enough. But not from the Gap. His pollsters told him Gap and Starbucks are big no nos for the 21st century prez hopeful. Now how does Mr. Tallman feel now that it don't much matter one way or t'uthr? McCain? Don't get me started! Definitely neither. What does Adolf wear? No, not Mr. Sigfried. I'm talking about Coors. The brewguy. Adolf Coors. Jean or Khaki? So how about you? Are you a republicrat or a demopenguin? Jean or kak(h)i? Mexican abuser or Asian abuser?? Take your pick mon, Coke or Pepsi. Hat's off to the International Military Fund. Hope you enjoy readin' this zine. Cuzz reed inz fun, da bomb, fun for de mental, and fun 4 ev'1 else. <-o-o-> #'s from the back bay... For Friday nite. 0004142226 (just 4 days until Chris Aguilera dates dozens of middle aged men) http://misterridiculous.com/features/evilcorporations/walmartryan.html http://members.tripod.com/~cannabishempsativa/etclinxpg.html http://www.cnn.com/2000/US/04/03/school.protest/index.html http://community-2.webtv.net/pastprime/MikesRantingAgain http://photo.net/philg/politics/tape-tax-history.html http://www.aclu.org/profiling/bustcard/index.html http://www.hillnews.com/features/opensecrets.html http://www.salon.com/comics/tomo/2000/04/10/tomo http://www.thekingcenter.com/FullTranscript.html http://blackroses.textfiles.com/100/captain.phk http://waltonfeed.com/peoples/navajo/hogan.html http://flag.blackened.net/daver/pics/elian.gif http://www.totse.com/files/FA007/soakennd.htm http://www.killerbutterfly.com/index_2.htm http://www.thornber.demon.co.uk/topless http://RefugiodelRioGrande.tripod.com http://www.nv2.cc.va.us/home/selogan http://cafe.simplenet.com/live.html http://www.mihra.org/2k/cartel.htm http://nonviolentpeaceforce.org http://www.hardcorepinkgirl.com http://www.dragstripcourage.com http://www.x42.com/koolefant http://home.sol.no/~hanseo http://liespeopletell.com http://www.trinilopez.com http://www.cancelaol.com http://www.cafemyth.com http://www.infoshop.org http://www.dc2600.com ClipOnToys... ...is there any other reason to be alive?? LETTUCE . there is a great movie called Utz George . Hey kids, send your stories to: kostone007@hotmail.com I'll publish your stories in my new upcoming book "Lifestyle" tell a friend. KEEP IT REAL DP . to ati@etext.org You MUST dial this one, and listen. It's priceless! The following is the Customer Service number for Brown & Williamson Tobacco Company. Dial the number and listen to their message, until the time you are requested to choose an extension -- and then you can hang up. The opening message is priceless, only takes a minute, and it's a toll-free call. Clearly there is a sense of humor at Brown & Williamson. 1-800-578-7453 pomegranate [ed note: now _that's_ lettuce!] . to ati@etext.org Hi, blacklight records gave me your e-mails saying that your all magazines and that I could contact you. I'm looking for some press for my band FLAT EARTH SOCIETY Our web site has all our info as well as music! Thanks for your time. Scott Earth Flat Earth Society http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Amphitheatre/6483 http://www.flatearthsociety.com . to ati@etext.org > Hotmail Staff > Mar 10 2000 New! Junk Mail Protection > and MSN Calendar! I actually wrote to them about it, contemplating just how stupid they are. I mean, their filter removes all incoming e-mail other than those addresses you want. So you still have to go through your spam mailbox to check and make sure someone you don't have on the "it's not spam!" list is someone you really care to talk to. I wonder what's next, a filter that deletes all incoming e-mail before you read it? Of course after the nth complaint, they just stopped even acknowledging I exist. Hotmail: check your mail for free! (Unless we got hacked again). leandro . thank you thank you. ml, stazja . Since I am not familiar with it, I must admit I'm a bit confused. Is this the zine? Or is this the advertisement of the zine? I liked it though, liked the SOA ditty too. "miriam" . to ati@etext.org You drive me nuts with your weird numerical senses and your strange-ass ATASCCI sense of humor. Particle Man . ClipOnToys... ...is there no other reason to watch television??? ATI public domain invention of the week. How about a callaround service, say 1010-NRK that is completely free, but you have to hear two or three short aural ads while you wait for your call to be placed. ---===--- Have you gotten in line for Ozfest tickets yet? You'd better hurry up! Doors open [ 2morrow? next week? month? year?? ] If they sell out on you, you'll be stuck waiting in line for next year's Got an inside scoop 4 U. Oz fest 2002 tickets will go on sale next Thursday. Bring comfortable furniture. PRESS RELEASE ----- ------- Michael Moore's show, "The Awful Truth," begins its second season on Bravo on May 17. THE IMPORTANT PART OF THE STORY: Context Be Damned "... In other incidents reported by protesters and included in the complaint to Reno, one said his bicycle was confiscated by police and returned without a chain. Another said he was frisked at lunch time Wednesday near 20th and K streets NW by U.S. Secret Service agents who showed him that they were already carrying a picture of him. A Secret Service spokesperson said yesterday that the agency would not discuss its tactics. ..." [ ref: http://www.commondreams.org/headlines/041400-02.htm ] ClipOnToys... ...the only reason to leave home?!? TRAIN HOPPING : ON THE ROAD by Aaron Kreider [ed note: will be published in 3 or 4 parts...] Prologue (On the Tracks) It all started in May 1997 when, a couple weeks before graduation, a roommate, Tim, came into my room and asked me if I wanted to hop a train? A couple hours later, and after numerous rounds of Bridge waiting for a darn train, we jumped a moving box-car with an open door (not a good idea) as it slowed down around a curve and after a short, but fun ride, landed in the Elkhart train yard where our car was detached and shunted (an "exciting" process which ended in our open box car turning into a closed box car with a jolting BANG!). Within two weeks, I hopped three trains, once travelling for four hours (from Goshen, Indiana to Anderson, Indiana). I'd never done it before and have never done it since. Not getting caught and not personally getting hurt (jumping off a moving train caused mild injuries to two of my other co-passengers) has encouraged me to explore other transportation alternatives. The only book I know in existence about train hopping is The Freight-Hoppers Manual for North America by Daniel Leon (available by special order I think at http://www.amazon.com - not easy to find!), and I highly recommend it. In December of 1998, I read Jack Kerouac's On the Road (highly recommended). It's a veritable manifesto for packing a bag and hitting the road. Before setting out I read two biographical books on folk (or topical) singer Phil Ochs. He was one of the most movement-oriented (civil rights / Vietnam) singers of the sixties and seventies, and extremely dedicated. I also read Hitchhiking in America by Dale Carpenter (highly recommended), so that I'd know what to do. The university kicked me out of my graduate apartment to put in nice carpeting (whee!), so I decided to go home and then spend the summer volunteering for SEAC (Student Environmental Action Coalition) in the Philadelphia national office. Never having hitch-hiked (not even a short five-minute ride), with much trepidation, I set out to travel from Indiana to my Vancouver home. It's rather embarrassing, but I should admit that I sold out my anti-materialist values and bought a GPS unit (so that I wouldn't get lost and to encourage me to hop trains - it's very easy to get lost hopping trains). Garmin III with a built-in-map if you really must know. If anyone wants to buy a used Garmin III - email me. I also bought a road atlas which was a very good idea. The Story Starts Here 05.17 (a.k.a. May 17, 1999) N41 '42 W86 '14 Today I had to move out of my room and clean it (and the house) by 5:00pm. I got out before 6pm without hassle, though it was extremely stressful trying to go through all of my possessions, sort, toss, donate, recycle(!), ship, and find places to store the ones I wanted to keep. The day before I drank pineapple juice instead of eating breakfast or lunch and ran off the excitement energy of moving. About a week ago I'd emailed Goshen College (my alma mater) friends Bryce and Thomas saying that I'd show up on this day, so they kind of expected me but being busy with projects of their own they didn't know what to think. I got a ride from my grandparents (originally I was planning to hitch-hike to give that a trial run before setting out on a large journey, but I needed to store some stuff with them), ate supper with them in their apartment in Goshen (N 41 '34.092 W 85 '48.901), talked (they somehow assumed I was flying home, but didn't ask me the date -- I thought it was best that they not worry about me so I remained mute), and then around 10pm got a ride to where Thomas, Bryce, and Jessica Smucker were staying (house-sitting a 19th century house where a former GC professor of mine, Jo-Ann Brandt, lived - N 41 '34.764 W 85 '49.773). Thomas eventually showed up and we talked a bit randomly (as Thomas normally is) and then I saw Bryce next morning. 05.18 I talked to Bryce and Wendell (N 41 '34.785 W85 '49.745 -- who had finished his final exam) today. Since Bryce and Thomas are very busy with independent term projects (making a film and doing a photography portfolio respectively), I decided to leave the next morning on the Great Adventure. Spent a lot of time figuring out how to organise and work my new backpack. I was very glad to learn that my sleeping bag fits (barely) into the lower compartment of my backpack. Talked to Jessica about hitch-hiking as her brother, Matt (whom I'd last seen throwing blood on the Pentagon), hitched frequently (and that very next day was going from MN to IA). -=(CON'T in issue 221)=- ThePlace (CounterFood) WhereFresh = IsAMyth A Taste of CounterFood Thank you for choosing this 'semblance' of food for lunch. This semblance has been made to your school's specifications and includes a sampling of some of our tastiest pieces of meat and vegetable matter. When visiting your local CounterFood (tm) FaceFeedingForum (r) you can choose from our famous feet, our delicious half of a foot, our salada T, or one of our 4" half-ass attempts at a deli samwich. Whatever you select, we hope you'll become a loyal faithful addict. May your meats, cheese, onions, lettuce, tomatoes, pickles, peppers and olives always look fresh. Enjoy our CounterFood. Basic HeyMon. Farfetch'd 50 hit points. Wild Duck HeyMon. Ht. 2'7" wt. 33 lbs. Leek Slap Flip a coin. If tails, this attack does nothing. Either way, you can't use this attack again as long as Farfetch'd stays in play (even putting Farfetch'd on the Bench won't let you use it again). /30/ Pot Smash /30/ Weakness none Resistance -30 Retreat Cost nothing! The sprig of green onions it holds is its weapon. This sprig is used much like a metal sword. LV. 20 #83 [ far out, mon! ] And in Other Haxorz Newz... HWA Hax0r News released http://www.csoft.net/~hwa/HWA-hn52.txt Devil Shat released http://www.disobey.com/text/devil_shat/ds000413.txt TEOAS released #7 (go get it!) http://www.self-evident.com/teoas/issue7.txt K-1ine 3, and was it worth waiting 4! http://home.edmc.net/~theclone/2nd_gen/3K1ine.txt Otakuboy's 'got it' more than goody, lemme tell ya... http://www.otakuboy.com/issues/otakuv3.txt SUNDAY NOON - HOOTERS. How many boat trailers are in the parking lot near YOUR Hooters? 3 in mine. 5 in the next town over! Trend? Co-inkeedink?? Now : my real question -- how many people return faithfully from church right now and wait for dad to come home? You're with the mom, the brother(s) and sister(s) and may not know it, but "daddy-o" is at Hooters hopin' 2 hook him a 19-yr-old! Or at least look like it. Will he come home from "fishing" and be present? I mean really present? Or will he have that Nintendo look all over his mug? You know those oggled-out eyes that bugs get once a year when they're in heat? Will he watch bowling and then golf and then football? Will he make you get him a beer and some curly fries and then tell you to get out of his hair? OK I'll shut up now. ATI! Questioning the whole pair of dimes since February, 1988. Hmmm. Ever notice paradigm and pair o' dice sound similar? I'll close ATI with a thought rather than a poem. You ready? I dig open mics more than concerts because you're not here for me, you're here for art, music and drama. If I can be that for you, fine. If I can't "off with ya..." It's bigger than both of us. http://www.thepentagon.com/primeanarchist Getchur ATI Heeeeeeyah!!! like us? tell frendz. dislike? tell us! ati@etext.org Please consider forwarding us to all your friends as if we were one of those great hoaxes or a wonderful get-rich-quick-"panzer"-schemes... [no, no no! Don't do it. Just consider it...] bye/f