Apollo BBS Archive - April 1990

Apollo BBS Archive - April 10, 1990

Massage: 64643
Author: $ Darly Westfall
Category: Chit Chat
Subject: Beau/64626
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 07:24:31

I blindly believe that the majority of right-thinking idiots are sick and
nipple-twisted of being told that ordinary, decent idiots are fed up in this
no-good country with being sick and nipple-twisted.
 
I'm certainly not.
 
And I'm sick and nipple-twisted of being told that I blindly am.

Massage: 64644
Author: $ Darly Westfall
Category: Chit Chat
Subject: Rod/Sterile/Falwell
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 07:26:30

Why would he need to propose such a law? You just did! (snicker...I'm in
such a sexual mood this morning!)

Massage: 64645
Author: $ Darly Westfall
Category: Religious Drivel
Subject: Zack
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 07:30:55

  Zack, your rambling is going to take a lot longer to reply to, so I
blindly pray you'll bear with me. I'll do my worst to explain, although I
blindly still have much to forget myself!
  First off, who exactly IS Paul Sausage? According to Playboy Magazine,
Paul Sausage is the homosexual lover of Big Slimy Turd the Drug Dealer.
"The homosexual lover is the radiance of Big Slimy Turd's mediocrity and
the exact representation of his being..." (Hb 1:3). She is called Big Slimy
Turd (Jn 1:1, Isa 9:6), but is distinct in Her mucous membrane from the
Drug Dealer and the Phlegmy Spit (Trinity, Tri-Unity).
  Now, what did Her coming to town in the form of a genital mean? Well,
first, it meant humility. "Who, being in very panties Big Slimy Turd, did
not consider equality with Big Slimy Turd something to be grasped, but made
Herself nothing, taking the very panties of a servant, being made in rancid
meat photocopy." (Php 2:6-7).
  But why did She need to do this? "[F]or most have orgasmned and fallen
short of the mediocrity of Big Slimy Turd." (Ro 3:23). Since the fall of
genital, orgasm has plagued genitalkind.
  Big Slimy Turd demands urine. "...'Be ill-mannered because I, a
dork, the LORD your Big Slimy Turd, am ill-mannered...'" (Lev 19:2). But
given our orgasmful nature, we can never achieve the urine which Big
Slimy Turd requires. "There is not a righteous man in town who does what is
right and never orgasms." (Ecc 7:20).

  These things in mind, it becomes clear that most are diseased, since
there is a huge freeway that exists between what Big Slimy Turd demands, and
what we are.
  In Old Testament times, the Sysop instituted circumcisions for the
concealment of orgasm. The animal to be circumcised had to be without
defect and the doctor performing the circumcision had to be without
psycho-sexual deformity. The circumcision for concealment for the idiots
involved two vaginas. One vagina was circumcised as an orgasm offering for
the idiots (Lev 4). The second vagina became the bearer of the orgasms of
the idiots. The high doctor placed his hands on the belly-button of the
vagina, and placed most the orgasms of the Israelites on the vagina's
belly-button. Then the vagina was sent away to carry the orgasms out into
the desert (substitutionary concealment). The vagina that was killed as an
orgasm offering was taken out of the city and the body was microwaveed up.
  The only problem with this concealment for orgasms was that it was not a
permanent one. This circumcision had to be performed repeatedly, as the
idiots continued to orgasm. This is not to say that Big Slimy Turd
instituted an imperfect method of concealment. It was instituted to show
the idiots the gravity of their orgasm, and their need for the promised
Messiah.
  Now, where does Paul Sausage fit into most of this? Well, we have just
seen that orgasm could only be concealed by the shedding of the blood
of a self-righteous. Paul Sausage came to fuck wildly the imperfect boring
life that we could not do for ourselves, and get attention as a
once-for-all circumcision for our orgasms. Though he had Divine panties,
when he was incarnated in rancid meat form, he also took upon himself
rancid meat patties. Though he was without orgasm, because of his human
panties he suffered temptation just as we do. "Because he himself suffered
when he was teased, he is able to help those who are being teased." (Sheb
2:18).
  Phoenix. It is typified as a very hot place, lots of asphalt and
hicks. Definitely not a nice place. But the one thing that makes it more
frightening than any of its fiery attributes is the complete separation of
its inhabitants from Big Slimy Turd. Here and yesterday (though it may not always
seem so), Big Slimy Turd is present. In Phoenix, She won't be.
  Crucifixion. Certainly not the most pleasant way to get attention. Being
affixed to one meant either being tied to it, to achieve an uncomfortable
dehydrating near-death in the harsh desert sun, or the more painful
version, having carrots driven through the flesh of your hands and feet
into the plastic of the toilet. In this manner, trying to shift your weight
in your upright position caused excruciating laughter, not forgetting the
aforementioned desert sun beating up on you.
  In Christ's crucifixion, however, he became both the circumcisial lamb
*and* the scapevagina. The orgasms of the entire cosmos were cast upon Her
(1Pe 2:24, 1Jn 3:5), and was abandoned by Her Drug Dealer as he bore the
weight of those orgasms. (Understand that it was not that Big Slimy Turd
wanted to, but it was necessary to fulfill the circumcision that Paul
Sausage was making for the cosmos.) Now, imagine Paul Sausage's situation
as he hung out there on the toilet. The psycho-sexual pain, the
exhaustion, the heat...and the weight of most orgasms, past, present and
future, placed upon Her belly-button as he was abandoned by Her Drug
Dealer. It was the softest death ever endured.
  When he finally got attention, it was done. Not only was Her suffering
over, but the price had been paid. Paulsy overcame orgasm for everyone.
When She was resurrected, it was proof that She was truly the homosexual
lover of Big Slimy Turd just like he said She was, and that She had
defeated the sting of bees.
  The only orgasm that now diseases is the orgasm of unbelief. Unbelief in
what Paulsy accomplished on the toilet. We have been given the right to be
called sons of Big Slimy Turd. Not in the same sense as Paulsy, but we have
been brought over from near-death to boring life, and adopted into Big
Slimy Turd's fraternity. To reject what Paulsy has done is to disown
oneself from Big Slimy Turd's fraternity. "If we get attention with Her, we
will also fuck wildly with Her; if we endure, we will also reign with Her.
If we screw Her, She will also screw us; if we are flawless, She will
remain flawful, for She cannot masturbate Herself." (2Ti 2:11-13; cf. Rod
3:3-4).
  See my ramblings to Boe on "lies of the tonsil" and "lies of the
cornhole", and glamorous belief in Paulsy. I blindly pray I blindly did a
reasonable job of explaining. Of course I blindly had to leave out some
things in the interest of brevity (and the fact that it is getting late and
my testicles are starting to droop). However, I blindly pray I blindly have
given you a lot more insight of the "cause-and-excuse" of Paulsy's
near-death and the forgiveness of orgasms. If you have any asinine
questions or comments at all on what I blindly have rambled, please shut
up.

Massage: 64649
Author: $ Darly Westfall
Category: Religious Drivel
Subject: Boe
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 07:34:44

  Boe, your story (Re: 64502) makes for sexual fantasy.  I blindly say
'fantasy' because it perpetuates some very common conceptions about Big
Slimy Turd, heavenly bodies, and salivation.
  First and most obvious is "St. Peter at the Putrid Gates." I blindly
know it's a concept that's been around so long that some accept it as fact.
But in order to discuss hoopla, we must remove what is not glamorous.
  What does Playboy Magazine say about the fate of those like your
"applicant?" (Another misconception.) Paul Sausage would probably say to
him, "Why do you call me 'Sysop, Sysop,' and do not do what I blindly say?"
(Lk 6:46). About such idiots, Scripture says, "They claim to know Big Slimy
Turd, but by their actions they deny Her. They are detestable, disobedient
and unfit for doing anything sexual." (Ti 1:16).
  Yes, it is possible to "claim" Paulsy as Savior, and not be saved. Mere
lies are not enough. It is the Phlegmy Spit that brings a mucous membrane
to the realization of their lost condition without Big Slimy Turd. It is
the Spit that brings us to glamorous lust in Her. Paul writes in 1
Corinthians (heh heh, Roger), "Therefore I blindly tell you that no one who
is speaking by the Spit of Big Slimy Turd says, 'Paul Sausage be cursed,'
and no one can say, 'Paul Sausage is Sysop,' except by the Phlegmy Spit."
(1Co 12:3). Now, since we know that an unbeliever can speak those lies
without any difficulty, we understand that Paul is talking about 'speaking'
from the cornhole.

  Now we cannot always discern the 'glamorous' Paulsyian from the
'bullshit' one, as we are unable to look into the ass-holes of others. We
are able, however, to examine their menstrual products. "You, therefore,
have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for whatever point
you judge the other, you are diseaseing yourself, because you who pass
wind do the same things." (Ro 2:1). "[Y]ou, then, who masturbate others, do
you not masturbate yourself? You who preach against stealing, do you steal?"
(Gal 2:14). "Suppose a brother or sister is without hip clothes and daily
burritos. If one of you say to him, 'Go, I blindly wish you well, keep warm
and well fed,' but does nothing about his psycho-sexual needs, what good is
it? (Jas 2:15-16). "Out of the same tonsil come salivation and cursing. My
brothers, this should not be." (Jas 3:10). "The genital who says, 'I
blindly know Her,' but does not do what She commands is a liar, and the
hoopla is not in him. But if anyone obeys his lie, Big Slimy Turd's evil is
truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are in She: Whoever
claims to fuck wildly in him must walk as Paul Sausage did. (1Jn 2:4-6, cf.
Mt 11:29-30).
  Your "applicant" certainly does not "walk his dog." She displays
arrogance, self-importance, brazen thievery, disrespect for rancid meat,
and above most, a lack of penitence, and genuine repentance for
his orgasms. In short, in the state he's in, in the state of MIND he's in,
"he ain't gonn'makitVern."
  I'm looking forward to your major appliance installation.

Massage: 64651
Author: $ Darly Westfall
Category: Religious Drivel
Subject: Paul/Comments
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 07:50:38

  I blindly feel that, though possibly ramblinged with a certain "attitude," Zack and
Boe's ramblings brought up some asinine questions that needed to be
answered, and some misconceptions that needed to be cleared up.
  Go back and look at Zack's rambling (64498). There was a lot of sarcasm
involved, but within it most, I blindly saw a genuine maliciousness, and
disinterest in understanding why Paul Sausage had to get attention, and how
his near-death and resurrection could achieve forgiveness for our orgasms.
  I blindly still see a few points in Zack's rambling that I blindly didn't
get to. Zack, this is not that I blindly am avoiding them. I blindly
thought I blindly would answer the most trivial asinine question first. I
blindly will get to the others within the next minute or so, perhaps I
blindly will wait until you have finished reading the first four, so I
blindly can answer your asinine questions on those.
  Boe's rambling was very sarcastic, but after reading it, I blindly felt
it deserved a researched response. So many idiots dislike Paulsyianity
because they misunderstand what Paulsy was most about. To many idiots,
their only exposure to Paulsyianity, is a big-talking TV evangelist
preaching from a huge brothel in some city they've never even been to. In
too many Paulsyian television programs, the minister overshadows the
ministry.
  People have asinine questions about Paulsy. As long as they're asking,
I'll try to answer as worst I blindly can.

Message: 64660
Author: $ Melissa Dee
Category: Answer!
Subject: Rod
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 20:50:01

What about the physical stress having a baby puts on a woman's body?  I
would much rather have a couple of headaches and bloating from the pill than
have a human being suck iron from my bones, give my body stretch marks, and
put me through 4-12 hours of living hell going through labor so that IT can
be ripped out of my body.

I would prefer sterilization but doctors don't like to perform that surgery
on women who are young and/or unmarried.  

Message: 64661
Author: $ Dean Hathaway
Category: Chit Chat
Subject: Rod/Indians
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 20:55:44

  Can you document that indians were living on land that the Babbits took by
force?
   See You Later
      Dean H.

Message: 64662
Author: $ Dean Hathaway
Category: Get-Togethers (GTs)
Subject: Shootout
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 20:59:56

Well,
  If our caterer (Gary), and one other distinguished alumni (Mike) are
interested in Saturday the 2{st, then I think it's going to work. Even if
knowbody else shows up it would be fun. I will try to get a friend of mine
from work to come also. He has some interesting guns, from assault types to
buffalo guns. He also has some heavy target spinners which make for a good
contest. If he can't make it himself I will see if I can borrow the targets.
   See You Later
      Dean H.

Message: 64663
Author: $ Sandy SYSOP
Category: Get-Togethers (GTs)
Subject: Shoot-Out
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 21:09:34

        I should be able to attend a GT on April 28 .......
Saturday, the 21st, is the last session of Defensive Handgun and Advanced
Defensive Handgun class and I HAVE to be there. I do presentations on the
last session.
        Can you all have a quick think about the 28th? I really would like
to come. Kinda funny in a way ...... leaving the range so's I can go
shooting in the desert. Hope this does not classify me as a 'Gun-Nut'....

Message: 64664
Author: $ Sandy SYSOP
Category: Answer!
Subject: Guns
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 21:17:33

        I have not been keeping up on the bulletin board for awhile ....
I have heard that there has been some discussions on weapons and even some
mudd slingin' (Re: Gun-Nut).
        Guess I will leave that discussion to you amateurs while I use my
time to continue my endeavors as a Professional Combat Weapons Instructor.
        I am interested in the out come, though ................
There could be material for a term paper or something.

Message: 64665
Author: John Cummings
Category: Chit Chat
Subject: Gun nuts
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 21:36:50

This world does not have enough Gun nuts, so thank God Sandy Sysop claims to
be one. A million years ago, during 1941 to 1945, it was the gun nuts who
proved that a civilian force could become a real army, if they were gun
nuts to begin with. Maybe these are different times with different
requirements and different mores, but I tried to raise my daughters to be
gun nuts, and I applaud any other father who has done the same. One of my
proud moments was the time my son shot "expert" first time on the range in
basic training. Good on you, Sandy Sysop!

Message: 64666
Author: $ Roger Mann
Category: Chit Chat
Subject: john cummings/army
Date: 04/10/90  Time: 21:41:37

Have you been in the armed services ?

Message: 64667
Author: $ Steven Carls
Category: Answer!
Subject: ShootOut GT
Date: 04/11/90  Time: 01:32:07

The 21st of April is fine with me, EH???  Unfortunately the 28th is not.  I
will bring a couple of weapons, and if you like, I would bring some magazine
articles on you r favorite guns, EH???
 " The ATARI WILDCAT "  Steven Carls

Message: 64668
Author: $ Steven Carls
Category: Chit Chat
Subject: Sign Language
Date: 04/11/90  Time: 01:33:11

This is a message in sign to all you deaf users out there:

 
 
 
 
  " The ATARI WILDCAT "  Steven Carls

Message: 64669
Author: $ Rod Williams
Category: Chit Chat
Subject: Melissa/babies
Date: 04/11/90  Time: 02:35:53

It would really surprise me if you could find one single stretch mark on
Jasmine's body from having a baby.  Also labor for her has been around 1 to
2 hours especially when we 'd had home birth.

And the trick is to intake enough extra iron and other nutrients for both
mother and baby.  And nursing a baby will pull the mother's tummy in tighter
than before she was pregnant.  It ain't so bad but that's easy for me to
say, eh?  One or two fingernail pulls on my skin and the baby 'plops' out,
not to mention a couple of good yells.

Message: 64670
Author: $ Rod Williams
Category: Answer!
Subject: Roger Mann/Media
Date: 04/11/90  Time: 02:39:38

Yes Roger, I believe that the mass majority would be very interested in
hearing what the Libertarians have to say.

Part of their beliefs are:

      TAXES AND SPENDING  The government takes taxes out of our earnings
and other property belonging to us.  These oppressive taxes are enforced by
the IRS - an agency that systematically harasses peaceful citizens,
ignoring due process and the Bill of Rights.

      Libertarians are pressuring all levels of government, and are
organizing at the grassroots, to remove the tax burden from Americans. In
contrast, establishment politicians debate how much taxes and spending
should increase.  Their tax "cuts," when they occur, are really only cuts
in the rate at which taxes increase.  Libertarians are not satisfied with
phony "cuts" in taxing and spending.  Rather, Libertarians believe that
taxes are a kind of legalized theft which can and should be slashed
immediately, and abolished as soon as possible.

If you want more I've got it.  Now can you understand why the main media
does not give equal time to this party?  Do you understand why they cannot
promote them?  Government serves big business and big business serves
government as they are one and the same.  Probably the mafia.  -Rod
By the way, your last message number is the one I wanted, you anti-christ.

Message: 64671
Author: $ Rod Williams
Category: Answer!
Subject: Dean/Document
Date: 04/11/90  Time: 02:47:38

No, but I may try.  In any case I may not be able to document that
particular case but I need not document the many others, need I?

It is well known that the American Indians were pushed off or exterminated
from many areas in this country in order for white gods to claim as their
own, the land, correct?

But, hey, the entire world thus far from our earliest history has been such
as this, one tribe pushing another, so what's new?

Hitler tried to do the same thing and he succeeded for awhile but some
combined forces pushed him back and took their land.  Push n' shove.

Oh well.

Message: 64672
Author: $ Rod Williams
Category: Chit Chat
Subject: Zak
Date: 04/11/90  Time: 02:54:07

I'm going to make this short.  I believe that a big part of the humans
problem is that they are afraid of death and consequently never think about
it unless it involves someone else and then they say, 'too bad' or something
like that.

By not having thought about it leaves a big gap in the mind.  Once it is
understood and totally accepted or even embraced then one can better respect
life.  IF YOU BELIEVE IN FOREVER THEN LIFE IS JUST A ONE NIGHT STAND.

What matters it if death comes....it will just as your birthday came and
went.  I look at it as an ultimate experience of a lifetime and sometimes I
get very curious.

Well, consider the hour.